"THE 'BURBS" (1989)

I -.. -rr-

Rev. 04/27/88 (Blue)

THE 'BURBS

Written by

Dana Olsen

Production Office: IMAGINE PICTURES, INC. COMPOSITE DRAFT Universal Studios Bungalow 466 April 15, 1988 100 Universal Plaza Universal City, CA 91608 Phone: (818) 777-6725

THE 'BUR!S

FADE IN:

of a quiet, tree-lined, cul-de-sac in any suburb, U.S.A. Seven modest, middle-income dwellings are spaced evenly along the street, with a woodsy marsh just beyond a wooden guardrail at the dead end. It is early, the wee hours, and all is still but for the CHIRP of the CRICKETS and the light PATTER of a LAWN SPRINKLER watering the yard of a meticulously landscaped split-level undercover of darkness.

located between the split-level and a compact two story Colonial. The oldest house on the street, the Tudor is singular in its dark, neo-Gothic design and also stands out from the others because of its disarray. The lawn is overgrown with wild, uncontrolled shrubbery, shutters hang loose, paint cracked and peeling. These people aren't gunning for a House Beautiful award. PUSH IN for a CLOSER look, careful not to disturb anything, and suddenly the nocturnal peace is shattered by a THUNDERING NOISE!! Churning up from the bowls of the Tudor, vaguely machine-like in nature, it sounds like maybe ...a big garbage disposal unit being dragged across a stone floor with heavy chains.

As the NOISE continues to rock the neighborhood, we PULL BACK and see a light go on in the Colonial next door.

The front door opens and a disturbed man in a ratty bath- robe comes out onto the porch. This is RAY PETERSON, our hero, late thirties, pleasant middle-class looks. A good neighbor. Right now, though, he's a bit annoyed, wonder- ing why this jerk next door woke him up with this alien racket. He walks down the three porch steps into the yard. A window slides open across the street and he looks over.

4 RAY'S POV 4

The orange dot of a cigarette ember hovers in thewindow of the split-level across the street, theone with the flagpole in the yard.

5 RAY 5

Now that he's not the only one on the street that's been disturbed, he decides to take affirmative action.

So he goes in for a closer look, walking across his drive- way to the property line.

It's downright eerie in the moonlight, the twisted branches of a neglected elm throwing shadows on the house as the mysterious NOISE CONTINUES.

7 RAY 7

stands tentatively at the edge of his neighbor's lawn. Is he bold enough to walk across the grass and ring the door- bell? Or would that be breaking the unspoken suburban code -- "Live and let live"? He looks across the street for guidance. The cigarette ember glows motionless. The ball's in Ray's court. He purses his lips, stuffs his hands into the pockets of his robe, and steps onto the lawn.

Immediately, the NOISE STOPS.

8 TIGHT ON RAY 8

He freezes, like a soldier who's just heard the click of a landmine arming itself under his foot.

stops also, milliseconds after the sudden ominous silence.

10 RAY 10

He gulps. Has he been spotted? Perhaps this wasn't too such a good idea after all. Besides, the noise has stopped, right? And this house is awfully creepy-looking in the dark. Gingerly, he removes his foot from the grass and backs up a couple of steps into the sanctuary of his own driveway.

The cigarette disappears and the window slams shut.

heaves a sigh. Looks up and down the block once more, scratches his head. The other houses on the block doze on, undisturbed.

13 LONG SHOT OF RAY 13

standing alone in his robe, in the driveway, staring perplexed at his next door neighbors.

We're TIGHT ON a spinning bicycle wheel as the CREDITS BEGIN. PULL BACK to see the rest of the bike and its rid- er, a twelve-year-old NEWSPAPER BOY, starting off on his route in the bluish pre-sunrise light. He plucks a rolled-up paper out of his basket, back-hands it beauti- fully onto the front porch of a ranch-house, and hangs a left in front of a street sign reading "MAYFIELD PLACE."

This is Ray's street. The first thing we see this morning is WALTER, the grouchy old man with the beautiful lawn. He's wearing an undershirt, baggy pants belted at the sternum ...and the world's worst toupee. A real Sy Sper- ling "one-size-fits-all" piece of shit. He tugs at his crotch and spits. As he bends over to inspect his pet- unias, a yappy white poodle zips out of his house, dashes across the street to the house with the Cadillac in the driveway, and arches her spine. Walter doesn't notice, though, standing at the edge of his property, staring at the grubby front yard of the Tudor right next door.

16 PAPER BOY 16

pedals up the street and hooks a morning edition at the poodle as she kicks grass over her package. He delivers to the house next door, a bungalow with a front porch scraped clean of old paint, then a ranch at the end of the block where a strange youngster named BARKELOW rides his bike in concentric circles, then turns to do Ray's side.

steps out of the house in time to get a paper lined into his shin, watches the kid skip the Tudor place. Walter growls something at the kid and then yells at his dog.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 4.

The poodle runs back across the street.

Walter says nothing, takes his dog and goes in his house. Ray shrugs, goes inside, opens the curtains and sits in the window to read.

TIGHT ON a tarpaulin, several unopened paint cans and some brushes. WIDE to reveal RICKY BUTLER, a slightly rumpled, spaced-out seventeen-year-old "setting up" to paint the porch. Actually, he's leaning past a huge stereo speaker in the window to put on side two of the "Physical Graffiti" album. And also ravaging a family-size box of Dunkin Doughnuts. Backhanding some jelly off his face, he looks over to ...

19 FLAGPOLE HOUSE 19

next door where MARK A. RUMSFIELD swaggers out of the front door, slamming it behind him.

LOW ANGLE SHOT, looking right up into his nostrils as he surveys his yard this fine morning. He's a militarist, all right. Close-cropped hair, square jaw, rippling pees underneath the Army issue T-shirt, tattoo on right bicep reading "Death Before Dishonor." *

His wife, BONNIE, a voluptuous knock-out fifteen years his junior, follows him out and hands him a tri-folded American flag. He marches to the pole, hoists the flag, salutes and snapsa rigid about-face.

Rumsfield nods to the freak.

Ricky notices Rumsfield's foothovering dangerously close to the doggie-doo-doo.

Too late. Bull's eye.

He hides a smile. CREDITS END.

Ray watches from his window as Rumsfield storms across the street to Walter's house, stopping briefly to scrape his defiled boot on the curb.

Rumsfield stands in the lawn,absolutely livid.

No reply from thehouse.

Now Bonnie is at his side, tugging his elbow.

The DOG appears in the front window and YAPS at him from behind the glass.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 6 .

He advances on the window. Bonnie grabs him around the waist and tries to pull him away.

watching all this with great interest. His wife, CAROL, a handsome, wry-looking woman, scuffs into the living room in fuzzy slippers, belting her robe.

Across the street, Rumsfield hauls up his garage door with one massive arm.

Carol leans over next to her husband and peers out. As the garage door bangs shut, Rumsfield curses, removing the poodle's greeting with a snow shovel anda stick. Ricky watches, delighted. Carol straightens up,pats Ray on the shoulder absently.

And scuffs into the kitchen.

A sunny little eating area that looksover the yard. Carol sits at the tablewith paper whileDAVE, their * eleven-year-old, inhales his breakfast. Ray stands at * the kitchen window with coffee,peering out at the Tudor house.

RAY

'- What's their name? Klopek?

{CONTINUED)

Carol looks up and taps her cheek pensively.

He snorts, shakes his head.

He stares at thehouse with narrow eyes, thinking hard.

Carol studies her husband tiredly. Ray catches her look. notes half a smile beginning. Then she looksdown at her paper.

-------------------------

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 8 .

She shakes her head, stifling something. He sits down at the table, lowering his head almost to his breakfast dish so he can look up into her eyes.

He grabs her wrist. She straightens up.

Ray retaliates in a flash; they've had this discussion before.

Dave catches this last line and finds it uproarious. Ray * silences him with a look. *

llY (to Carol) I'm still on work time! My body clock hasn't adjusted yet, that's all. Honey, I've been looking forward to this for weeks. Come on, we've been in the house three years, we've been working our tails off to get it right and I've never had time to enjoy it. I want to relax around my house, for once. Do some yardwork, maybe fix that old brick barbeque in the back, lay around and listen to the ballgame and drink beer ...

23 CONTINUED: ( 3) 23

Carol sighs.

He winks at her. Now we look past Carol out into the back yard where VINCE the dog is BARKING at something in the bushes.

VINCE BARKS at a section of shaking bush on the south property line. We hear the CRUNCH of TWIGS snapped under- foot and then, slowly ...a rifle barrel slides out of the hedge.

VOICE (O.S.) (from bush) Ssh! Quiet, Vince!

The rifleman exposes himself. This is ART WEINGARTNER, Ray's other next door neighbor. He's a soft, wacky- looking middle-ager, with a paunch and a slight overbite. Leaves stick in his thinning hair as he sights the rifle on...

25 BIG FAT CROW 25

squatting on the Klopeks' fence. Art takes a deep breath and squeezes the trigger. POP! The CROW SQUAWKS and takes off as the PELLET SNAPS into the FENCE six inches below him. Art curses and breaks from the bush, PUMPING the RIFLE furiously to try and get another SHOT off be- fore it's out of range.

Carol freezes when she sees Art.

Ray bolts for the door instantly.

Art's swinging the rifle in a long arc, tracking the crow. Ray steps out on the back porch.

liY Art!

The arc stops in Ray's direction and the GUN POPS again. Ray dives to the ground as the PELLET PLUNKS THROUGH the porch LIGHT, busted GLASS raining down on him.

He watches the CROW swoop off into the sanctuary of a tree, chiding him with a series of SQUAWKS. Then he looks over at Ray.

llT Was that your porch light?

We're TIGHT ON Art's air rifle leaned against the wall. GO WIDE to see Art has joined the Petersons for breakfast, wolfing down an English muffin as he talks.

llT Well, you know how Suzette is about her bird feeder. Goddamn crows start showing up out of nowhere and raid the thing, she's on my back to do something about it.

He slurps his coffee. This guy eats likea machine.

He injects a piece of bacon into his face.

Ray looks at Carol. Carol looks atRay.

As if on cue, the strange noise from the Klopek house CHURNS up again. Art pushes his plate away and brushes crumbs off his shirt.

Art shakes his head.

Art widens his eyes and wags his brow.

Carol laughs into her coffee. Ray winks at her. Art goes to the window, strikes a dramatic pose as he gazes next door.

Art detects an exchange between Ray and Carol.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 13.

DAVE

There's three of 'em. They only come out at night. Ricky Butler says they're nocturnal feeders.

All heads turn to Dave. Ray shakes his head.

DAVE

(to Art) Last week I was up on the roof looking at the full moon with my telescope, and I saw 'em in their back yard.

No one says anything for a beat. Carol smiles.

DAVE

Well ...they were digging.

Art's eyes go wide as saucers. Carol puts her hand over her mouth and starts laughing.

Ray pushes away from the table and stands.

He pecks Carol on the cheek.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 14.

AltT Where're you going?

Art hops up to follow him.

AltT Hang on, I'll help you.

They exit. Dave looks at his mother.

DAVE

~ not the one that woke up in the middle of the night.

Walter observes as a Chem-Lawn truck sprinkles his turf. Over at Ricky's house, Ricky and Dave stand in front of * the porch, arms folded, minds working.

DAVE * I thought your parents wanted it white.

He steps back, holds up a thumb like an artiste.

30 RUMSFIELDS 30

Bonnie, in a mind-blowing bikini, is on her hands and knees planting bulbs at the base of the house. Rumsfield has his lawnmower up-ended and wipes down the detached mower blades with gasoline, staring across the street.

Bonnie looks up.

standing on the edge of his lawn, staring with concern at the Klopeks' wild overgrowth creeping dangerously close. The Chem-Lawn truck pulls away.

32 RUMSFIELD'S POV 32

Now Walter digs at a clump of crabgrass on his property line.

Bonnie into her garden.ing again.

As Rumsfield turns to face his wife, he notices ...

34 RICKY BUTLER 34

staring mesmerized at Bonnie's shapely ass. The lid from a primer can drops from his hand and clatters on the driveway. Then, Ricky catches her husband glaring at him ...and a broad, shit-eating grin spreads across his face.

35 RUMS FIELD 35

to Bonnie, out of the corner of his mouth, as he twirls the sharpened mower blade in his hand:

turns at the sound of Ray's GARAGE DOOR ROLLING noisily up. Ray and Art, in shorts and ratty golf shirts, see Rumsfield and wave.

He smirks and waves back, drops to his knees and plunges the blade back onto the mower.

37 RAY'S GARAGE 37

Ray pokes around under his workbench as Art leans against the car chewing bubblegum.

He produces a shiny red toolbox, sets it on the bench.

He opens the box. Art whistles.

He picks up a tool, studies it.

Art shrugs, turns to look out at the street. Ray looks at his tools.

He closes the toolbox, checks his watch.

He joins Art at the edge of the driveway. They watch the Barkelow kid ride his SQUEAKY BIKE in the cul-de-sac for a beat.

He turns away.

Ray folds his arms, thinking hard.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 18.

Then he shakes himself out of it.

Now Art grabs Ray's shoulder.

Ray turns and Art nods over toward the ...

as the front door opens.

All work on the block stops and all heads turn to stare as HANS, the boy, steps onto the porch. He's a gaunt, pale lad, of a rather indiscriminate adolescent age, with stringy hair, a caved-in chest. He looks around a bit self-consciously as Walter to his right, Ray and Art to his left, Ricky Butler, Dave, and the Rumsfields across * the street all stare wordlessly at him. Keeping his eyes moving from one comatose neighbor to the next, Hans shuffles to the edge of the porch and squats down to pick up the mail packet.

39 ART AND RAY 39

transfixed, watching the kid's every move. Art nudges Ray.

Ray looks at Art tentatively.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 19.

40 RUMSFIELDS 40

watching Hans from their vantage point.

41 WALTER 41

reaches down and scoops up the poodle as she's about to charge into Klopeks' yard.

42 RICKY BUTLER 42

snaps his gum, a keen eye on the action. Dave's eyes are * on Art and Ray.

43 HANS 43

straightens and backs up slowly for the door.

44 RAY AND ART 44

Art shakes Ray by the elbow.

45 HANS 45

slips back into the house and closes the door, a weasel retreating to his den.

THE 'BURBS -Rev. 4/27/88 20.

Ray gives Art a shove.

47 RUMSFIELDS 47

watch Art and Ray quibble, taking turns pulling each other toward the Klopek house.

He shakes his head and turns back to his lawnmower.

~8 ART AND RAY 48

Now Ray's grabbing Art and pulling him toward the house.

Art hesitates, looks across the street. Ricky Butler jumps up and down in his driveway, yelling ...

... and pointing at the house.

They start for the house. Ricky Butler breaks into enthu- siastic applause. The Barkelow kid even glances over. The Rumsfields stop to watch, Walter glares from his front picture window and Dave nods to himself. *

We study their faces, INTERCUTTING, as if they were the townspeople and Art and Ray were Gary Cooper meeting evil - Roy Slade at the O.K. Corral. Tense MUSIC BUILDS. They reach the front walk.

Dead vines, dirty windows, leavesblowing across the brown grass ...A loose shutter with aCREAKING HINGE BANGS on an upper window. It's creepy.

50 ART AND R.AY 50

Look at each other. Step onto the porch.

I don't think the bell works.

He reaches for the door knocker, a big brass affair in desperate need of a good polishing.

(grabs knocker) They have what?

Art repeats the word "bars" but it's obscured when Ray knocks the knocker, because the vibrations loosen a big old shutter that drops with a sharp BANG!, breaking open a nest of suddenly pissed-off WASPS. BZZZZZZ!!

Bees!

51 WIDE ANGLE 51

to see Art and Ray dash from the porch, screaming and waving their arms like lunatics, as a mass of wasps attack them. They run around in circles, jump over bushes, gradually twisting toward the street.

RAY/ART Bees! Wasps! Aaaaagh! Help!

52 ANGLE ON RUMSFIELD 52

Immediately, the soldier in him surfaces. He screams at his wife:

THE 'BURBS- Rev. 4/27/88 22.

She dashes off to do that while he runs to grab the nozzle end. With Art and Ray still screaming, Rumsfield grabs the hose and breaks for the street.

53 ANGLE ON COIL OF HOSE 53

uncoiling as Rumsfield runs for the street.

54 RUMSFIELD 54

still running. We see Art and Ray start for him. The WATER HISSES on full force.

55 HOSE COIL 55

It's out of coils. It goes taut.

56 RUMSFIELD 56

still running at high speed, he suddenlycomes up short of slack. His feet fly up over his head, his body pauses in mid-air for a millisecond, then he slams down on his ass.

57 RICKY BUTLER 57

running from his garage with a can of Raid, sees this and collapses in hysterics.

58 BARKELOW KID 58

stops riding his bike in circles to watch the madness.

59 BARKELOW KID'S POV 59

Three grown men run around the yard screaming, waving their arms, rolling in the grass, spraying each other with the hose.

60 DAVE 60

sits down on the porch and watches, shaking his head. *

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 23.

They've sprayed things up pretty good. The wasps have dispersed. Rumsfield wields the hose like a weapon yet, blasting Art and Ray full force from point blank. Winded, soaked, stung and exhausted, they raise their arms in surrender.

Art falls down in the marsh, gasping for air and choking. Rumsfield turns off the hose.

Ray gets down on one knee, panting and nodding his head.

Ricky Butler comes running over with the Raid can, excited as hell.

-..,

Ricky goes to Art, grabs a wet hand and pumps it vigor- ously.

Art and Ray look at each other. Rumsfield stares across the street. After a beat:

He stands there shaking his head. Soon, everyone is quiet, looking at the Klopek house.

TIGHT ON Rumsfield, steely-eyed. -'

We go WIDE. Sad men. Defeated men. Staring wetly at the house, the victor in round one.

Smug in its impenetrable formidable-ness. A curtain moves in a second story window. Maybe it was because of the wind. Maybe not.

A62 INT. KLOPEK HOUSE - DAY A62

We're inside a dark room on the second floor looking THROUGH a dirty window TO Art and Ray in Rumsfield's yard. A hand pushes the curtain back into place.

Carol steps out of the house onto the patio carrying a platter of meat. She immediately spots something O.S. and bursts into loud, spontaneous laughter.

At the barbeque in apron and chef's hat. Greasy bee-sting ointment smeared over two lumpy red bulges on his fore- head. He glares at his wife's cruel taunting.

65 CAROL 65

gets a hold on herself, starts to arrange the table. But she can't resist zinging him.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 25.

Her voice starts trembling, she's losing it.

She bolts into the house, EXPLODES O.S. Ray sneers, turns to look at Dave, standing mutely beside him.

DAVE

I didn't say anything.

Ray looks back at the fire.

DAVE

I thought you were gonna fix the 214 barbeque today.

Dave turns and leaves, moping.

DAVE

God ...

He lets the screen door close with a healthy whap!

66 RAY 66

self-consciously presses one of the lumps, winces. Then he sees --

67 CROW 67

squatting on the Klopeks' fence. It SQUAWKS at him.

68 RAY 68

scowls at it, pissed.

He sneaks a piece of charcoal out of the bag and heaves it at the crow. It takes off. Nodding to himself, he defiantly squirts a stream of lighter fluid at the fire. It flares up and he jumps back, losing his hat.

The moon is up and the wind is blowing as Ray comes out to the front door to take Vince for a walk. Vince chooses Walter's yard for his first stop, making Ray very nervous.

He tugs at the leash but the dog won't budge. Then a voice:

VOICE (0.5.) Hey. you with the dog!!

Ray jumps a foot, looks over and sees Art beckoning with a beer can from Ricky's house.

Ray and Art stand in the yard, leaning on the porch rail. Ricky sits in a patio chair, chugging beer, then cranes his neck up at the night sky.

Ray and Art flick a glance upward.

Ray snorts. Art turns and stares intently across the street at the Klopeks. Ricky notices.

Ray shakes his head. Ricky follows Art's stare across the street.

71 RICKY 71

looks to Art for a reaction. A breeze kicks up, blowing through the trees, then -- BANG! -- we hear a DOOR SLAM SHUT over at the Klopeks. Art's eyes narrow keenly, like a dog on a scent.

72 RAY AND RICKY 72

look at each other. Art stares into the night sky. EERIE MUSIC begins as he starts a morbid reminiscence.

~T (gravely) It was a summer night like this when they found him.

~T Oh, itwas before your time. Way back ...Hinckley Hills was much smaller then,everybody knew everybody,never had to lock your door ... Imusta been ... sixteen, seventeen. Anyway, uh ... there was a soda fountain in the drug storewhere the library is now. Guy that ran it, the soda jerk, was a rotund guy with glasses named 'Skip.' Had a bungalow over on Elm. Wife, couple of kids. (MORE)

ART {CONT'D) Nice enough guy, pleasant ...not real sharp, but ...whaddaya want, he was a soda jerk. Guy's forty years old wearing a paper hat making cherry cokes, safe bet he's not gonna be running for governor, right? So there was this heat wave. A real scorcher. I think the record still stands from that summer, it was in the hundreds for days. And the people over on Elm started to notice this ... nasty, rotten stench in the air and ... itwas coming from Skip's house. Well, nobody did anything for a while. What do you do, ring the guy's bell and say, 'Hi,your house stinks'? So they tried to ignore it. But it got worse and worse, finally one of the neighbors called the cops, they go to his house, he tells them he's got a sump pump problem, he'll clear it up, they say fine, they leave. Next thing you know, there's smoke coming out the-windows. Fire department shows up, breaks into the house ...There's Skip, lying dead in the kitchen with the gas on. They go in the basement ... wife and kids clubbed to death weeks before. The bodies are decomposing in the heat. After he did it, he just threw a sheet over 'em, kept going to work as usual. Cops showed up; he figured he was caught. Offed himself. Torched the house. Made one too many lemon phosphates one day and just (snaps his fingers) -- snapped.

72 CONTINUED: ( 2) 72

Art nods morbidly.

Ricky wrinkles his brow, thinking hard.

Someone swallows hard. In the distance, a DOG HOWLS at the moon. Vince's ears prick up and he starts GROWLING.

He unties the dog.

He's wide awake. It's late. Carol sleeps soundly next to him, but his eyes are like saucers. We PAN OVER TO the window, curtain blowing in with a calm night breeze. It's dead quiet in the street ...or is it? We begin to pick up a NOISE... almost like footsteps, but daintier ...like tiny little elves in tap shoes trotting back and forth in Ray's driveway. TIC-TIC-TIC-TIC ...TIC-TIC-TIC-TIC...

74 RAY 74

He hears it, too. What the hell is it? Imagination? Vince, asleep at the foot of the bed, suddenly pops his head up, ears erect. It's not imagination if the dog hears it, too. TIC-TIC-TIC-TIC... VINCE muffles half a BARK, hops off the bed and trots over to the window, his nails on the hardwood floor going "TIC-TIC-TIC-TIC..." Ray sits up. It's an animal out there. VINCE is at the window and GROWLING. Ray swings his legs out of bed and is halfway across the room when-- ROWROWROWR!!! -- ter- rible, horrible ANIMAL SHRIEKING pierces the night! Ray, startled out of his jock, vaults straight into the air and lands in a crouch on the bed as Vince goes nuts BARKING and trying to jump through the window. Carol's upright and trembling, clutching the sheet to her chin.

ROWROWROWR!! HISS! SHRIEEEEEK!

Vince claws at the screen, baring his teeth. Carol snaps out of her sleep mode and rolls her eyes at her husband, still crouched on the bed. She crosses to the window and pulls Vince away, scolding him.

Vince obeys. The PANDEMONIUM in the street STOPS.

3l.

LOOKING UP AT Ray's window. We hear Carol's voice as the window slides open.

76 ANOTHER ANGLE 76

And the window's closed. But now we hear HEAVY BREATHING and notice something on the bottom of the FRAME, right at ground level. It's hard to tell what it is in the dark but ...now it starts moving and it looks kind of like ...a carcass being dragged across the cement. As the BREATHING CONTINUES, we PAN LEFT TOWARD the Klopeks.

Over on the side of the house facing Walter's place, the gate slowly swings open. CREE-E-E-EAK... and the thing that's doing the breathing and the carcass-dragging makes its way for the opening.

in Rumsfield's yard LOOKING UP AT his picture window. The bottom third of the FRAME, however, is blocked by a blurry, dark mass with FLIES BUZZING all over it. We see Rumsfield come to the window and look straight AT us. He spots the mass, his eyes widen and we see him mouth the words, "Jesus Christ!" We PUSH UP as he throws open the front door and jumps onto the porch.

78 ANOTHER ANGLE 78

SLAM! We STAY WITH Rumsfield as he crosses to Walter's yard, ranting and raving the whole way.

He stops. We GO WIDE to see Walter just standing there with his hands in his pockets, staring at his lawn. Ricky Butler stands with him, mutely.

79 WALTER.' SLAWN 79

It's all torn to shit. Looks like the Rams just scrim- maged on it. The old man's devastated.

Walter mumbles something unintelligible. Rumsfield gets down on his haunches to survey the carnage, hefting a lump of sod in his hand. He looks up at Ricky.

Walter stumbles over to the property line, a bit dazed. His eyes lock on the flagstone path leading to the fenced-off portion of the Klopeks' back yard.

Rumsfield hooks a thumb toward his own yard.

Whatever it was paid me a visit, too.

Ricky shakes his head.

Rumsfield nods grimly.

80 WALTER 80

is now on his haunches, staring at the Klopeks' flag- stones. He stands and brushes off his hands.

-------------------~--- --

Then he marches into the house.

He looks at the wrecked lawn, shaking hishead. Ricky turns to peruse the Klopeks' property,around where Walter was squatting.

Paper boy comes pedaling up the street, whistling. Then he hits his coaster brakes and sucks in his whistle as he sees:

82 PAPER BOY'S POV 82

Ricky, Rumsfield, Art in his shorty pajamasand Ray, with coffee, standing on Ricky's lawn having an anxious discussion.

83 GUYS 83

Ray has the upper voice at this point.

Ray starts laughing. Art smirks.

The Paper Boy approaches apprehensively. The men spot him.

This whole exchange goes rapid fire and overlaps from here.

83 CONTINUED: ( 2) 83

84 ANOTHERANGLE 84

SLAM! The discussion is halted by the sudden appearance of a new Klopek, standing on the front porch staring at the cluster of frenzied neighbors. He's a short, squat, dark, European-type fellow in baggy pants and a greasy sleeveless undershirt. Call him UNCLE REUBEN.

Reuben wades into the bushes and pulls out a coil of dirty garden hose. As he does so, our attention turns to ...

85 WALTER'SHOUSE 85

as the oldman stomps down his front steps and picks his way across his mangled yard to confront Reuben.

86 GUYS 86

watch with amazement.

The Paper Boy, a relative newcomer to the pack, shakes his head slowly.

Walter, hands on hips, berates Reuben, occasionally pointing to either lawnand the flagstone path. We can't exactly make out what he's saying, but we catch a few expletives. Reuben stands there without reacting for a bit, then hits the spray nozzle on the hose and turns it on the flagstones, wetting Walter's legs in the process. Walter jumps back, shakes a fist and storms into his house. Reuben twists off the hose and drops it. TIGHT ON Reuben as he turns toward the group across the street.

88 REUBEN'S POV -GUYS 88

They stare at him for a long,uncomfortable beat. Then, slowly and in mechanical unison, they raise their hands and wave in a quasi-neighborly,zombie greeting.

89 REUBEN 89

unsure of what to make of this,waves back, and goes into his house.

90 GUYS 90

watch him go. A beat.

Everyone looks at him.

ON his look, we ...

It's real dark. We hear a PERSISTENT SQUEAK and spot the Barkelow kid's bicycle headlamp going around and around.

Ricky and a te~nage girl (GAIL) are dragging folding chairsout onto the porch.

They setup their chairs so as to have a perfectview of the neighboring houses.

Art's garageDOOR RATTLES up and Art skulks out in old sneakers,

···-·TED: 95

RAY (CONT'D)

Like t~ =·-~theMarquisdeSade, with a rack a ·nd thumb-screws and ...and coffi ·ns with nails in 'em that poke yo"..c..__________·-·-----"---your eyes out!Isn't that silly? ?

It's ve-:-"_----,----------verysilly.

RICKY

The hoc=============~uselights dim ...

---------ks his lu~~==============uminouswatch and points across the

RICKY

Anc·==============~nd...curtain.

----·-----Art'sgaz:::======·z- arage DOOR RATTLES up and Art skulks out ~-----.old sneak ers, cutting through the hedge into --~ard .

..._:_____~__._?'5LIVIN\.L·------NGROOM - NIGHT 97

RAY

I can': -'t believe these guyshave nothi ng better to do than spyon the nev=-u=-"---·"m.eighbors! Like the Klopeks brough ~t ~ into the neighborhood! Well, : I'm a grown man. I'm not sinkini ng to their xenophobic level. I'm no ~t about to get involved ina bunch c=:-..=-:::::==:.::..:.::==:.:.:::=.of childish games ...

- NIGHT 98

_ front w:...::--·------------------::.window.

---.______._-_·'SLIVIN,--------~;GROOM -NIGHT 99

~====-ts as thE=·===========ney CLATTER on the GLASS.

He puts down his drink and bolts for the door.

As Art and Ray confer in low tones, Ricky explains to Gail.

Ray and Art start to cross the street to Rumsfield's, glancing over their shoulders at the Klopek house.

Rumsfield charges outside, slams the front door. BANG! Art and Ray wince. He joins them out front, tossing Art a large rifle scope. Art puts it up to his eye and smiles.

liY What's this?

liY (taken aback) What arewe gonna do with ~?

Ray looks across the street.

liY I don't know if I'm up for this, guys. Carol spots me crawling on their lawn at night, I'm a dead man.

liY No! I just think~ is taking it a little too far. Jesus, infra-red scopes ...What's next, tapping into the phone lines?

liY Oh, for -- why don't we burn a cross in their yard while we're at it?

Art shushes him and holds up a hand, looking across the street.

liY Come on, guys, nothing that's happened so far merits this --

Rumsfield shushes him, holds up a hand. He cocks. his head at an angle, listening.

We begin to realize that for the last couple of moments, there's been a LOW, barely detectable HUM, vaguely electronic in nature, permeating the still of the neighborhood. It MOUNTS a bit in VOLUME and suddenly becomes quite noticeable. They all look at each other.

Ray nods, cocking his head aside. Art sticks his pinky in his ear.

llT Yeah, I thought it was just me.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 41.

Rumsfield starts to look around at the tree tops.

The BUZZING getsLOUDER.

Ray cranes his neck, scanning the trees with Rumsfield. Art's focused across the street.

Goddamn power company.

They look at Artand follow his stare across the street. We PAN OVER TO the Klopek house. It's definitely the source of the HUM and it's beginning to reach an ALARMING PITCH.

It sets LOUDER and HIGHER until they have toclamp their hands over their ears and then-- ZAP!!! A big, blue electrical charge goes off from the Klopeks', lighting up the basement windows white hot for an instant, like all the juice in the county was tapped and blown with one big shock. The noise knocks the three guys out of their socks and the brilliant flash temporarily blinds them. Then all the neighborhood lights flicker and dim to half-intensity and some smoke curls out of the Klopeks' basement window.

Both chairs now empty. One is turned over on its back.

An aroma accompanies the dissipating smoke. Rumsfield takes a few sniffs.

Art squats and yanks Ray down to the ground.

Before he can protest, Art clamps a hand over Ray's mouth. Rumsfield drops to his knees and points across the street. We LOOK. The Klopeks' garage door is opening.

They crawl, commando style, up behind Rumsfie1d's garbage cans, the big aluminum kind, set on the curb for morning pick-up. Excellent cover.

105 ACROSS STREET 105

The garage door is up all the way. It's pitch black inside. We hear a CAR ENGINE START. Then, slowly, a big black Pontiac slides out head first, cruises to the end of the driveway, and stops.

Peering out from behind the cans, they pull their heads back and look at each other. Art mouths the words, "No headlights?" then they peek over the cans again.

107 BACK TO SCENE 107

With the ENGINE IDLING, the front door opens and Hans Klopek, the gaunt, beady-eyed teenage son,gets out. He looks left, looks right, looks left again. Then he plucks the lid off of one of their curbed garbage cans. He opens the back door of the car, reaches in and pulls out a big green garbage bag, stuffed with something very bulky and very heavy. It plops on the driveway. He drags it over, hefts it up and dumps it into the can.

We can see the whites of their eyes quite clearly. Art gulps.

109 BACK TO SCENE 109

Hans stuffs the bag down in the can,then goes back to the rear of the car again. He reaches inand pulls out what appears to be a large hoe, but with oneend flattened out like a potato masher.

He carries it over to the can, sticks in theend and starts tomash the garbage bag down. Really getting into it,he pounds the shit out of that garbage bag, making mush of whatever was inside of it.

110 REACTION -GUYS 110

Art's blanching. Rumsfield and Ray are glued to the macabre scene.

Ricky and Gail look at each other,fascinated.

112 ACROSS STREET 112

Hans puts the lid back on the can,tosses the hoe into the car,gets in and backs it intothe garage. The DOOR RATTLESdown and closes. Overhead,some THUNDER CRACKS.

113 GUYS 113

stay frozen behind the cans,trying hard to make sense out of what they've seen as the firstfew drops of rain peltthem. Finally, Art breaksthe thoughtful silence.

The rain intensifies.

114 GUYS' POV 114

The Klopek house, looking nightmarish in the rain. Next to it, Walter's house is quiet and dark.

115 GUYS 115

Art stands.

Now the RAIN is really coming down. Ray looks up.

They think about this for a beat.

He and Gail stand, open the door.

117 GUYS 117

They split up. Art and Ray splash across the street, ducking out of the rain onto Ray's porch, where they pause.

Ray says nothing, looks through the rain at the Klopeks' garbage cans. Art reaches out and claps a damp hand on Ray's shoulder.

Art winks, delighted. Then he jumps off the porch and trots into the rain.

118 RAY 118

stands pensive for a beat, then snaps out of it and opens the front door, shaking his head. He's not going to give this another thought, right?

The raging THUNDERSTORM douses the street. Rain comes down in buckets, lots of lightning and THUNDER. We MOVE IN ON Ray's bedroom window. As we get closer, some lightning illuminates it long enough for us to see a figure standing there, looking out.

Ray stands at the window as the RAIN DRUMS on the GLASS. He's just watching the storm, deep in thought. Or so we think.

121 RAY'S POV 121

As the STORM rages on, we stare into the blackness of the Klopeks' yard. Another lightning bolt flashes, illuminating the yard for an instant, giving us a brief glimpse of what it actually is that Ray's staring at: in the middle of the Klopeks' lawn are three shadowy figures in rubber ponchos. Standing there in the rain. In the middle of the yard.

And they're digging ...

on the back of the truck, as it WHINES obnoxiously, SCRAPING the latest load into the hull.

PULL BACK to show two GARBAGE COLLECTORS, hauling the Barkelows' cans across the pavement toward the bin. These guys are professional noise makers. They gotta wake up early for work and they want everybody in the neighborhood to know it. They slam the cans against the truck, scrape them along the cement, skim the lids down the street, etc. They finish at the Barkelows', hop on the truck and one of them sticks his fingers in his mouth and whistles:

The TRUCK CHUGS into a U-turn at the cul-de-sac and pulls up in front of Art's house.

Art's alseep on the couch in his robe with the TV ON. Outside, the garbage TRUCK makes enough noise to wake up the dead. We hear the WHINE of the SCOOP again. Art rolls over and opens his eyes. It takes him a second to shake off the sleep, then he sits bolt upright.

~T Garbage men!!

Art comes tearing across his yard, his robe whipping in the wind.

125 ANGLE ON GARBAGE MAN 125

about to empty the first Klopek can into the truck. He hesitates and looks back to see what all the yelling is about. Art bolts INTO FRAME, takes the can out of the Garbage Man's hands and dumps it out into the street.

Art wades through the trash in his slippers, spreading it out furiously with his hands. Not finding anything in that can, he lunges at a second one. The other Garbage man, a black guy in a leather hat, has hold of one of the handles. Art tries to wrench the can away from him.

2ND GARBAGE MAN Hey, man!

Art rips it from his grip and dumps it over. Then he kicks over a third and starts rifling through that, too. The Garbage Men sidle up to one another and exchange furtive glances as Art tosses trash around like a madman.

Carol grips the phone protectively, angling away from Ray, who's reaching for it. She barks orders at him.

He lunges again, she twists away and starts punching numbers furiously.

THE 'BURBS -Rev. 4/27/88 48.

You call going to the lake restin&? Drive three hours on a crowded expressway sowe can sit in that

sour cabin with the ratpoison and the horrible bathroom,while that man next door with the enormous head gets drunk and beats his wife? God, Ihate that place! There were teeth marks in the soap last time!

127 ANOTHER ANGLE 127

Now Dave comes trotting into the kitchen with big news. *

DAVE * Hey, Dad! Art's throwing garbage all over the street! I think he's having a stroke!

Ricky leansa ladder against his garage, watching over his shoulder as Art climbs into theback of the truck and the twoGarbage Men yell at him.

Now Rumsfield comes charging out of his house, clad only in a bath towel, his hair wet and his face half- lathered. He pads up to the truck and cranes his neck into the hull. Art looksup and shakes his head.

The two Garbage Hen look at each other.

2ND GARBAGE MAN (to partner) I don't like these fucking cul- de-sacs, man. There's only one way out and the people who live in 'em arealways weird.

Ray comes out the door, Carol at his heels, pointing a finger.

Carol stops at the edge of the porch as Ray advances on the rapidly heating discussion at thegarbage truck.

130 GARBAGE TRUCK 130

As Ricky and Ray join the discussion, these lines collide and overlap:

2ND GARBAGE MAN (to partner) Let's take a break, man. I need a cold drink and a Twinkie after

- this.

Bonnie spots Queenie, Walter's poodle, sniffing around the yard. She hurries down the steps and scoops her up.

Now she looksmore closely at it.

She heads across the street to Walter's house.

132 GARBAGE TRUCK 132

While Bonnie knocks on Walter's door, we notice all the guys at the truck staring at Ray.

Everybody shakes their head and mumbles.

They all look at the house.

A beat of morbid silence.

{CONTINUED)

2ND GARBAGEMAN Wait a second. (to Art) Buried ~ in the yard?

Bonnie walks over, smiling, Queenie under one arm.

Dunh-dunh-duuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnh!

Rumsfield, on Ricky's ladder, presses his forehead against a 2nd story bedroom window and peers inside. Ricky foots the ladder while Bonnie, Art and Ray observe.

SMASH!

{CONTINUED)

Art has wandered into the center of Walter's back yard. He stands with feet apart, arms folded,watching the Klopek house with the steely determination of MacArthur re-invading the Philippines.

He's forced the window upand we see hisass and legs slide in.

Bonnie gasps and puts her hand to her mouth.

Ray sighs, shakes his head.

134 BACK DOOR 134

We hear a RATTLING at the back door and everyone jumps. The door opens and Rumsfield comes out.

Ray frowns, shrugs. Art joins them, staring at Rumsfield expectantly.

He swings a hand out from behind his back and tosses Ray something small and hairy. Ray catches it, grimaces as he examines it. Ricky peers over his shoulder.

Bonnie gasps.

Ray turns it over, looks at the adhesive side.

Now we hear Art shriek at the absolute peak of his vocal capacity:

Bonnie jumps out of her socks. Ricky, Ray and Rumsfield look at each other and bolt for the yard.

135 ART 135

his face beet red, shakes his fist.

He starts to run for the fence. Rumsfield knocks him down with a flying tackle. He struggles.

Art tries to restrain himself.

Now Art's eyes flick up to the house and he shrieks:

The guys snap their heads to the Klopek house.

136 REVERSE ANGLE 136

One of the dormer windows is open and the curtains billow out.

137 BACK TO SCENE 137

Rumsfield drags Art away from the fence.

Suddenly, he bolts into the street directly in front of the Klopeks' and points a finger.

They drag him around the corner. Ricky turns to Ray.

As they share a look,we --

Ray, Queenie on a hunk of clothesline at his feet, com- poses a note, mumbling to himself as he writes.

He goes to put the pen back in hispocket, gets a hand- ful of hair.

He stands there with the toupee in hishand and, awkwardly, pushes it through the mail slot in the front door. As he does so,we notice QUEENIE GROWLING gutturally at the Klopek house and backing up to cower behind Ray's legs.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 56.

139 1EVERS! -KLOPEK HOUSE 139

Uncle Reuben is perched in an upper window, staring malevolently at Ray.

140 RAY 140

suddenly very clumsy, slides the note in the door jamb, clears his throat, then tries to smile and wave.

ButUncle Reuben disappears into the house and the cur- tains close. Ray reacts.

Dave crouches at the basement door, his ear pressed * against a water glass held flush to the panel. Nearby, Queenie vies with Vince for dog food.

MVE * They said they were going to play canasta. And then they locked themselves in.

Carol finishes loading the dishwasher,walks over to the basement door and rattles the knob. Then sighs and shakes her head.

No enswer. She bangs a couple of times. Still nothing. Then:

Go get me a butter knife.

TIGHT ON an old, black book with gold embossed letters reading "The Theory and Practice of Demonology." After a beat, we notice the book start to tremble slightly and as we PULL BACK, it falls flat on a card table, revealing Ray, bug-eyed and pale.

Art notes his friend's reaction from the other side of the card table and nodsgrimly.

He jumps up, runsaround the table to Ray and begins to leaf furiously through the book.

He grips Ray's shoulder.

Various disturbing illustrations of goat-headed demons, pagan gods, bizarre ritual ceremonies, etc.

144 BACK TO SCENE 144

Ray clucks his tongue, rubbing his forehead.

Art doesn't hear him, he's already plotting.

Suddenly Art springs on Ray and clamps a hand shut over his mouth.

llT Don't be a fool! It's the non-believers that are the most vulnerable! The walls have ears!

O.S. the basement door opens, FOOTSTEPS hit the stairs and Carol's VOICE ECHOES in the basement.

Art screams, Ray rips his hand off of his face and, trying to retain some semblance of calm, answers.

Carol turns into the basement from the stairs just as Ray yanks the demonology book off the card table and plops it into his lap. Ray meets her furtive glance with a shit-eating grin.

ON her reaction, we --

& &

Ray lies rigidly in bed, gnashing his teeth, trying to watch television while Carol reads the devil worship book next to him. She clucks her tongue and shakes her head.

Ray nods rigidly, chewing a thumbnail. Carol snorts, turns a page.

Ray doesn't respond, trying hard to concentrate on the television.

No response.

He's watching Poltergeist.

149 BACK TO SCENE 149

Carol claps the book shut and swings out of bed.

She ducks into the master bath and closes the door. Ray, eyes wide, clutches the sheet to his chin and watches the tube.

150 INTERCUT TO RAY AND TV 150

151 TV 151

A huge, revolting skull pops out of the closet and snaps at Craig T. Nelson.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 60.

152 RAY 152

grimaces and changes the channel.

153 TV 153

Mia Farrow gets raped by the devil in Rga!:milo'l~aby.

154 RAY 154

changes the channel.

155 TV 155

Linda Blair pukes up green shit and casts aspersions at Father Damien's mother.

156 TIGHT ON RAY 156

freaking out.

157 CAROL 157

comes out of the bathroom, looks at the bed.

Ray is a lumpy, quaking mass under the blankets. HOLD ON Carol's reaction and ...

158 DREAM SEQUENCE 158 thru thru

Dave watches Ricky stir a can of paint in the driveway.

DAVE

My dad's grounded.

They look over at Ray's house.

THE 'BURBS- Rev. 4/27/88 61.

Ray sits on the edge of his bed in his bathrobe, watching Bugs Bunny. He's unshaven and he's got big bags under his eyes. Restless as a kid in detention, he goes to the window and watches, dejectedly, asRicky and Dave * shoothoops in Ricky's driveway. Then he hears something in hisown front yard and looks down to see ...

171 ART AND RUMSFIELD 171

on his lawn,waving their arms at him. He opens the window.

Rumsfield smirks.

But he's cut off as Carol comes out, fuming. She points to Ray.

Ray frowns, ducks back inside.

She yells across to Dave: *

your mother with the shopping, please?

Ray watches forlornly as Art and Rumsfield cross to Ricky's porch.

Rumsfield sits on a lawn chair nursing a beer. Ricky watches, amused, as Art paces the porch.

Ricky nudges his friends. They're loving this.

He pauses. Rumsfield shrugs. And coughs.

ZOOM INTO a CLOSEUPof Art, hatching his scheme.

Vince the dog digs furiously at the base of the fence. Ray dozes in a lounge chair, fourcans of Budweiser and a carton of cigarettes on a table beside him. He's snoring.

Art and Rumsfield stand nervously on Klopek's front porch. Art reaches up, presses the bell -- DING-DONG! -- and the two of them tear ass like bats out of hell, Rumsfie1d bolting across the street to his house, Art vaulting the bushes into Ray's yard.

From Ricky's porch, we hear EXPLOSIONS of HYSTERICAL LAUGHTER.

Art breaks through the bushes and rolls into the yard, perspiring and breathing heavily.

Ray shifts on the chair, still dozing. Art jumps onto the patio and shakes him.

Ray wakes up screaming, falls out of his chair.

Ray looks at Art. Twigs and pieces of grass stick to his sweaty face. His eyes bulge.

177 VINCE 177

Now we see Vince pull a bone out from the hole he's been burrowing under the fence. He proudly trots to the patio, dropping the bone at Art's feet.

Ray jumps out of his chair.

178 RAY 178

While Ray yells, Art tosses the bone back into the yard and Vince darts off to fetch it.

179 VINCE 179

Now the dog's on the patio again, dropping the bone at Ray's feet. Ray picks it up.

Art snatches it out of Ray's hand and examines it.

180 RAY 180

looks at the dog. Vince sits patiently, staring at the bone, waiting for someone to throw it again.

Ray stutters and then -- his eyes lock on the fence and he blanches.

Art looks once at the fence and hisjaw drops.

He holds the bone in front of hisface.

Involuntarily, Ray screams.

181 MEN 181

PSYCHO PANIC MUSIC SHRIEKS. CAMERA ZOOMS IN AND OUT REPEATEDLY ON the bone and the screaming men in a dis- orienting acid-fright nightmare effect. Then...

Suddenly, Art springs on Ray and clamps a hand over his mouth! Art's eyes are wide and trained next door, where we hear a SCREEN DOOR SLAM. We start a SLOW, SUSPENSEFUL PAN OVER TO...

182 FENCE 182

All we can make out through the slats are shadows, but we can hear FOOTSTEPS on the grass within the yard ... and they're coming closer...

183 PATIO 183

Art and Ray stand frozen, petrified, as the FOOTSTEPS CLOSE IN on the fence.

184 FENCE 184

Now the shadow and the footsteps are nose-to-nose with the fence, a puff of smoke curling upward from just the other side. The WOOD CREAKS as a couple of slats bend inward, indicating the smoker is leaning on the fence, peeking through a crack.

185 ART AND RAY 185

hold each other, paralyzed with fear.

186 FENCE 186

CREAKS a little more. Then, up over the top, comes a crumpled piece of paper. It lands softly in the grass, and the smoking presence retreats. The SCREEN DOOR SLAMS again.

187 ART AND RAY 187

Art breaks from the patio, leaving Ray frozen stiff. In a crouch, he runs to the wad of paper and furiously opens it. His expression turns dark and he looks at Ray.

Ray's eyes bulge and he breaks for the back door just as ...

188 CAROL 188

opens the back door. WHAP! Ray falls back, toppling over a patio chair, sending beer cans and ashtrays flying. He's bleeding from both nostrils. Carol looks at him, sees Art standing sheepishly in the yard. She folds her arms.

The Rumsfields have joined the Petersons and Art on the porch. Ray holds an ice pack to his face, his head tilted back.

She thumps him on the chest.

JlAY (rehearsed) Yes, Carol.

Art snaps his fingers.

Art shuts up.

thru thru

DRUM CADENCEUP as the welcome wagon marches up the Klopeks' frontwalk with Bonnie in the lead holding a tray of brownies. The men trail the women somewhat apprehensively. They reach the dusty porch and Ray grabs Carol's arm.

She rings the bell while Bonnie raps with the knocker.

196 DOOR 196

We hear MOVEMENT from within. FOOTSTEPS APPROACH. Carol looks at the group.

The curtain in the door window moves, an eye peeks out. Rumsfield, in trying to affect normalcy, leans casually on a rusting wrought iron chair. The arm crumbles under his weight, however, and he drops, yelling. This startles Bonnie. She yells and drops the brownie tray. Rumsfield curses.

He takes a mighty kick at the mess,sending the tray and chunks of fudge slamming into the wall of the house just as Hans opens the door.

Carol recovers immediately and offers Hans her hand.

She sticks her head and front leg through the door, bracing it open as Bonnie charges in. Hans looks unsettled.

Ray follows the girls in, smiling politely. Rumsfield brings up the rear, handing Hans the bent tray piled with a dusty, crumbling brownie mass salvaged from the drop.

The place is done in sort of a "nouveau Vincent Price" motif, very dark, old-looking furniture, dusty velveteen wall-covering, weird etchings, etc. Carol and Bonnie immediately set about casing the joint professionally, combing every detail like a couple of Presidential advancemen.

Bonnie picks up a vase and reads the labelon the bottom while Carol scratches a nail on an ancient silver service. Rumsfield backs Hans against the wall and smiles at him, nose to nose.

198 RAY 198

examines a circular blade from a table saw he found lying on a coffee table. It's rusty and stained.

Ray kicks Rumsfield in the leg, cutting him off. Bonnie starts for the dining room.

-------------------~~--- ---

THE 'BURBS -Rev. 4/27/88 71.

199 ANOTHER ANGLE 199

Hans goes to stop her, but she stopsanyway, yelping in surprise as the little squatKlopek we saw with the garden nose appears in the archway to the diningroom. He's in the same dirty sleeveless T-shirt and he's smoking. Bonnie puts ahand to her chest.

He nods curtly, marches into the room and stands directly opposite Ray, staring up into his eyes. Ray tries to smile and nod, tugging at his collar. An awkward pause.

Ray opens his mouth to say something, but all that comes out is a squeak like a rusty hinge.

He sweeps the cake out of Carol's hands and ducks out of the rooa. Everyone stands there for a second, then Rumsfield thumps Reuben on the back.

Dave hurries over to Art and Ricky, scudding to a stop on his knees, out of breath.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 72.

Art is applying black shoe polish to his face for this night raid.

He and Ricky look hard at Art.

Simultaneously, and without hesitation, Dave and Ricky

shake their heads.

Art flips over and drops six feet -- RRIP! -- leaving a portion of his pants dangling from the fence.

He lands roughly, torso-first, in a noisy, dried-up old rose bush with a lot of thorns. As he rolls in the dirt, cradling his shoulder and trying not to scream, we can hear Ricky and Dave laughing in the other yard.

He turns to survey the yard. It's dark, butwe can see clu.pa of dug-up sod and turf scattered about.

A shovel comes up and over the fence and nailshim squarely on the head. He drops to his ass. More laughter from Ricky and Dave.

Everyone sits awkwardly in the living room.

Reuben's seated directly across from Ray, their knees almost touching. He continues to stare, working a tooth- pick in his mouth. Carol and Bonnie watch him, then look at each other, trying not to laugh.

Reuben says nothing. His eyes bore into Ray, assessing him from head to toe, perhaps estimating his coffin size. Rumsfield gets anxious, rises from his chair and stands over Reuben, giving him a cold, interrogating look as he lights a cigarette with his Zippo.

Reuben shifts to return Rumsfield's stare.

Rumsfield smiles and nods, as if expecting that answer. Then he changes subjects.

Rumsfield bangs his fist on the wall.

He stomps on the floor three times. Ray shifts in his chair. A beat. Then THREE ANSWERING STOMPS from the basement shake the room. Ray freezes.

203 HANS 203

entering from the kitchen with the coffee and cake, hears this last question and looks at Reuben. Reuben shakes his head slowly. Hans puts the traydown and starts to pour the coffee. Rumsfield presseson.

Reuben cuts him off with a sudden -- ahem! -- then turns to Rumsfield.

Rumsfield raises his eye~rows.

Ray coughs loudly.

She gets up to help Hans, hesitating as he picks up a carving knife. Rumsfield folds his arms and leans against a wall, in a staring contest with Reuben.

Rumsfield inspects his nails.

Rumsfield takes a step toward Reuben.

Reuben stands.

Carol wedges herself between Rumsfield and Reuben with a piece of cake on a plate.

And she jams a forkful into his trap.

Art, crouching near the base of the house where he's ex- amining a freshly dug hole, freezes as he hears something. SCRATCHING NOISES from inside the basement windows ... like a prisoner clawing at the glass. Trembling, he backs away from the house and stumbles over a trip-wire, strung with tin cans and varous racket makers. He goes down noisily, tangled.

Everyone sits around drinking coffee. Hans pokes his head up, hearing the NOISE.

Hans gets up to do his uncle's bidding.

Hans hits a two-pronged electrical switch.

Art stops in his tracks as, somewhere in the yard, a GENERATOR of some kindWHEEZES INTO LIFE.

Ray rubs his temple, staring at his coffee, as the neighbors converse.

Hans shrugs. Ray sips his coffeeand makes a face like he's got a mouthful of battery acid.

She looks at Ray.

Now a DOOR SLAMS off the entry hall and FOOTSTEPS APPROACH the living room.

209 ANOTHER ANGLE 209

All eyes turn to the hall as DR. KLOPEK, a dark, fortyish, harmless looking chap, enters, perspiring and wiping his hands on a rag. He smiles.

Dr. Klopek steps into the room and offers Ray his hand.

He looks at Carol. She grins smugly.

210 DR. KLOPEK 210

goes around the room introducing himself. He stoops to kiss Carol and Bonnie on the hand. They look quite pleased with themselves and would probably, if they could, thumb their noses at their husbands. The good doctor pours himself some coffee and smiles again.

Everyone laughs politely. Except Rumsfield.

Ray spills his coffee in his lap and yelps. He hops up and starts to blot it with a napkin. Rumsfield isn't phased.

Over his shoulder, to Ray:

REtmEN (quickly) I'll bet you were.

Now it's clear Reuben and Rumsfield are facing off.

210 CONTINUED: ( 2) 210

Ray bails out.

He goes to a door off the hall and reaches for the knob.

But it's too late. He opens it.

211 RAY 211

jumps back, knocking over an end table, as a Great Dane the size of a race horse flies out of the basement, lopes across the living room in two giant steps and turns toward the back of the house.

Hans runs after it as Bonnie grabs her heart.

A huge, canine shadow dances on the wall for an instant, then -- RRIP! -- the dog flies right through the screen.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 80.

213 AltT 213

craps as the huge, GROWLING BEAST vaults the porch rail. He drops everything, tears ass for the fence, leaps and -- SClEEEEEEEEECH! A horrible, piercing ALARM goes off and floodlights snap on, bathing the entire yard in a painful white glare. Art scrambles to get over, the gaping jaws of the Great Dane inches away.

Dave and Ricky scatter as Art flies over, catching a heel * between two slats. He dangles there, helplessly.

Everybody but Ray stands at the rail watching as Hans tries to wrestle the dog away from the fence.

Part of one shoe protrudes from the gap in the wood fence and we can hear SHOUTS and struggling from the dangling intruder.

Reuben reaches into the kitchen and turns off the alarm. Now all we hear is ART'S SHOUTING and every DOG in the neighborhood.

Reuben nods.

He moves off into the yard. Rumsfield follows at his heels.

Carol turns awkwardly to Dr. Klopek, tries to smile.

And now Ray's in the kitchen door, sweating and breathing heavily. Carol frowns at him.

She glares at Ray.

He holds out his hand. It's shaking.

He looks out in the yard as Art falls from the fence and drops on the other side.

Art sits with his foot propped on an ottoman while Rumsfield administers an ice pack. Carolpaces angrily, Bonnie sits quietly and Ray is pressed into a corner observing.

216 CONTINUED: ( 2) 216

Art chews on this for a while. Rumsfield smacks his fist into his palm.

Bonnie turns to Ray.

Everybody looks at him.

Ray opens his eyes, purses his lips pensively. He waits a beat. Then:

216 CONTINUED: ( 3 ) 216

Carol starts to protest, but Ray shoos the girls out of the den.

217 ANOTHER ANGLE 217

He closes the den doors behind them and turns to Art and Rumsfield.

Ray reaches into his trousers ...

... and pulls out a familiar hairy object. Art gasps.

Ray smiles maniacally, tossing the wig up and down in his hand as he lays it out.

{CONTINUED)

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 85.

Rumsfield finishes the thought:

Ray nods morbidly, goes to the bar, pours himself a belt and slugs it down.

CLOSE ON Ray as he looks hard at his two comrades.

HOLD ON him for a beat, then...

The Barkelow kid does his laps and Ricky has progressed to actually spreading a few strokes of blue paint on the porch.

--

THE 'BURBS -Rev. 4/27/88 86.

Both of them stop to watch the Klopeks' Pontiac slide out of the garage and up the street, the Great Dane's head hanging out the rear window.

219 RUMS FIELD 219

shirtless, opens his bedroom window and watches the car turn the corner. As soon as it's out of sight, he ducks inside and slams the window shut. Ricky smiles.

Art's practicing chipping on Ray's lawn as Ray hustles Carol and Dave into the car.

He leans down to pat Dave on the head.

DAVE * I hate 'em, Dad. Rudy's a moron and Diane smells.

He pushes Dave into the car. Carol stops at the driver's * door and gives Ray and Art a long, long look. Art obliges with a chip and a gleeful

llT 'Fore!

Carol nods slowly.

Art and Ray wave from the yard. As soom as the car's up the street -- SLAM!

221 RUMS FIELD 221

is on his porch with fire in his eyes and both fists clenched.

222 RICKY 222

pulls a phone with a long extension cord onto the porch as Rumsfield crosses the street to confer with the guys.

223 RAY'S BACK YARD 223

Ray and Art stand at the base of a telephone pole next to the tool shed at the corner of Ray's property. Rumsfield sits on the lawn loading batteries into a pair of walkie-talkies. Art wears a yellow hard hat and a tool belt and glances up at the top of the pole. In addition to the phone lines up there, there's a wide cylindrical power transformer.

Rumsfield snaps a walkie-talkie closed and hits a button. RUUURR-RUUURR-RUUURR! A metallic SIREN SQUAWKS.

He tucks the blueprints in his pants and bends over to adjust his lineman climbing spikes. Then he digs in and starts the ascent.

Art nears the top. Ray and Rumsfield observe from below.

Art is at thetop now, high above the neighborhood, fastening himself to the pole with a length of gaffer's tape. He flashes Ray the high sign, takes the blueprints out of his pantsand peruses them.

He takes a closer look at a small trap dooron a hinge in the middle of the transformer. Then he pullsa screw- driver out of his belt and starts to pry it open.

225 GROUND LEVEL 225

The guys watchhim anxiously.

Rumsfield looks over at the house.

226 TRANSFORMER 226

Suddenly, we hear a LOUD BRAAAAP! A puff of smoke pops out of the transformer and they all scatter as Art drops, screaming, right through the roof of the tool shed like it was cardboard. White, powdery dust billows out from the shed on the thud of impact.

227 BACK TO SCENE 227

The two of them scramble around to the door of the shed, gagging on the dust. Ray rips the door open and dashes in. He tosses out a couple of rakes and a tangled garden hose, then backs out, hauling Art by the armpits.

228 ART 228

is covered with the dust (it looks like quick-lime), and his head's nodding back and forth.

llT Wow! What a jolt! Look, it turned my fingernails black.

He probes a finger into his mouth.

He starts to get to his feet shakily.

~T (to Ray) Can I stand under your hose?

Rumsfield trots off to get the hose while Art knocks fertilizer off his body, looking up at the pole.

229 ANGLE ON RUMSFIELD 229

pulling the hose away from the house toward the guys. Then he stops and looks at the fence. He drops the hose, takes a few running steps and leaps onto the fence. He hangs on it like a monkey, shaking and kicking his feet as the FENCE CREAKS and sways under his weight. He looks over his shoulder at the guys.

230 GUYS 230

Ray claps Art on the shoulder.

llY Nice work.

Art smiles and nods. Rumsfield consults his watch.

Rumsfield trots off. The game is afoot.

Rumsfield slides open an upper window and peers out of his house. Down below, Ricky sits on a section of scaffolding in front of his garage with an army helmet on his head. A few streaks of blue paint dry on the house as he looks up and down the street through a "He- Han-Masters-Of-The-Universe" toy spyglass. Satisfied, he takes a swig from a plastic liter bottle of Coke, spots Rumsfield and shoots him a thumbs-up.

232 RUMS FIELD 232

shakes his head, sticks a leg out and climbs out onto a section of roof. The walkie-talkie hangs on his belt, binoculars dangle from his neck ...and there's a semi- automatic rifle slung on his shoulder. Ricky spots the gun and gasps.

233 RUMS FIELD 233

EQUIPMENT JANGLING, Rumsfield pulls himself onto the top-most portion of roof which offers a nice overview of the surrounding neighborhood. He takes a quick 360 degrees recon of the area and reports into the walkie- talkie.

standing at the fence in Ray's yard. Art replies.

Art tucks the radio into his belt, motions to Ray. Ray gives him a leg up and over he goes. We hear him THUD DOWN on the other side. Ray starts handing tools over the fence: a pick-axe, two shovels, some wire-cutters.

235 RUMSFIELD 235

leans against the chimney, scanning the tree-tops with his binoculars. He puts them down, unslings his rifle and lays it on the roof within easy reach.

236 RICKY 236

in his driveway, stands next to a grubby seventeen-year- old (STEVE) in mirrored sunglasses and a black T-shirt. They slap five and Ricky yells up:

237 RUMS FIELD 237

looks down at the leering burn-out in the driveway.

Rumsfield grumbles something unintelligible.

Steve nods compassionately.

working on a nice hole in Klopeks'yard, about two feet deep and four across.

They're working up a nice sweat in the heat, really laboring hard.

Ray nods, mops his brow with a forearm.

Ray grunts, concentrating on his digging.

Ray climbs out.

Art nods, goes back to digging.

239 RUMS FIELD 239

smoking a cigarette on his perch. Below him, the window he crawled out of opens and Bonnie sticks her head out.

Rumsfield rolls his eyes.

He frowns and picks up the walkie-talkie.

240 ART AND RAY 240

Art's waist deep in a hole now. Ray is two holes away. The yard looks like a mortar testing range.

Ricky and Steve hang on the fence from Ray's side, causally observing with a bag of potato chips.

242 ART 242

rests on his shovel.

He and Steve split. Art turns to Ray.

He picks up his shovel again.

243 RUMS FIELD 243

drops half a ham sandwich in his lap, opensa jar of sunblock and creams his nose.

244 RICKY AND STEVE 244

shoothoops.

245 ART AND RAY 245

Ray, all muddy and sweaty, stops to catch his breath.

Art swats at a fly.

246 WIDE 246

to see the whole yard has been unearthed for the most part. Big, gaping holes and mounds of freshmud everywhere.

Ray looks over at the house for a beat, deciding.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 96.

247 ART 247

wipes his face on his shirt and nods. Ray tosses his shovel out of his hole and climbs out.

They approach the house. Art gets to the back door and jiggles the handle.

248 RAY 248

sighs, pulls his wallet out and flips it open. Art helps himself.

Art takes another one, slides it into the jamb and starts working it. Ray watches intently as Art concentrates, pulling and pushing and turning theknob.

He wiggles it and bends itsome more and ...SNAP! The card breaks off in the door and Art is left holdinga plastic sliver. Ray grits his teeth.

Art backs up to the house nonchalantly and,very calmly, swings a shovel and SHATTERSa first floor WINDOW. Ray covers his ears. Art stands up on a lawn chair and starts to knock the shardsout of the pane, making a lot of NOISE.

Ray stands look-out while Art hauls himself upand into the house. He fallsinside and BREAKS something else. Ray winces as we hearhim STOMP AROUND to the rear door, unlock it and open it.

It's dark and quiet as a tomb inside. Art and Ray stand at the kitchen entrance, covered in mud and sweat, their chests heaving. They stand motionless for a beat, just listening to the ominous silence.

Ray nods.

Ray gulps. They move shoulder-to-shoulder across the kitchen.

251 BASEMENT DOOR 251

swingsopen with a real haunted-houseCREAKING HINGE, REVEALING the uppermost basement stepsleading down into the blackened maw. Art hits the light switch. Nothing happens. He works it back and fortha few times.

Rumsfield's bummed. There's two cars in Ricky's driveway now and four guys on his porch, blasting tunes and smoking cigarettes. Steve leansover the railing, really wasted, and yells up at Rumsfield, pointing to his watch. -

253 ANOTHER ANGLE 253

Now Bonnie sticks her head out of an upper window.

Rumsfield stands up and points a finger.

Pitch black. And now, down the stairs, creep Art and Ray, Art hunched over in front gripping a kerosene lantern that throws their eerie shadows on the wall.

They reach the landing and-- WHANG!! --Art hits his head on a low pipe.

255 ANOTHER ANGLE 255

Holding up the lantern, he follows the pipeup to a spot where it goes right through the ceiling.

Now he follows the big pipe back to its point of or1g1n, where his lantern illuminates a curious tangle of conduit and insulation stemming from a big, black, turn-of-the- century furnace.

256 ANOTHER ANGLE 256

Meanwhile, Ray rips a black curtain off the far wall and a dusty shaft of grey light comes in through one of the barred windows, giving us a better view of the dank, mostly empty subterranean room. Ray sneezes on the dust from the curtain.

Art examines the thing with great interest. Ray seems strangely drawn to it also, crossing to it slowly, looking at all the dials and pressure gauges.

Ray puts his hands on a couple of pressure valves.

257 ANOTHER ANGLE 257

And he spins the handles, opening the valves. We hear AIR HISS into a tank and then -- RUMP! RUMP! RUMP! The whole place vibrates with the by-now familiar mysterious noise.

The shock knocks both men off their feet, Art bounces off a wall and Ray stumbles back onto the floor ...and knocks loosea hunk of linoleum.

Rumsfield and Ricky react as the NOISEgoes OFF.

He vaults off the porch and runs into the yard to yell up at Rumsfield:

loses his footing and starts to slide down the shingles. The rifle starts to slide, too. Rumsfield lunges for it, misses, then grabs the gutter to keep from dropping. He hangs from the drain pipe as the RIFLE hits the lawn, MISFIRES, and BLASTS the driver's WINDOW out of his Cadillac. Ricky hits the dirt.

260 TIGHT ON STEVE 260

And the other kids.

261 RUMSFIELD 261

dangles helplessly from the drainpipe.

262 RICKY'S FRIENDS 262

break into a smattering of applause.

263 BARKELOW KID 263

watches intently.

Art has a steel door on the shell of the furnace open and stands there, awed at the intensity of the blue flame jets inside.

265 ANOTHER ANGLE 265

But Ray is busy pulling up loose floor tiles, moist with fresh adhesive. The ground beneath them is moist, also, and crumbles easily as Ray digs it up with his fingers. Art comes over as Ray sits back on his heels, his dirty hands trembling.

Art kneels next to him, looking at the divot.

Art grabs the back of a chair, pulls it back and tosses it into a corner.

Art starts heaving loose furniture into odd corners as Ray rips up the linoleum.

Ricky's ladder is leaned against Rumsfield's house. Rumsfield and Ricky's friends stand before the Cadillac.

Ricky calls down from the roof, where he holds the walkie-talkie.

Rumsfield pokes his head through the busted window.

Rumsfield looks up the street.

Rumsfield motions up the street.

267 POLICE CRUISER 267

has turned the corner and is crawling toward them. Rumsfield kicks his rifle under the car.

268 KOPLEK'S BASEMENT 268

We see the shadows of the grave-robbers flickering eerily in the light of the kerosene lamp. They're working on a large hole, about knee deep, and making good progress.

Rumsfield and the kids affect casual innocence as a COP leans against the Cadillac.

Now, across the street, we hear a DOOR SLAM and Art flies out of the Klopek house, filthy as a pig and excited as hell.

He stops yelling as he spots the Cop, trips on a bush and goes down hard. Ricky waves him off and Art gets up and goes into Ray's garage.

The Cop takes this in and Rumsfield chuckles nervously.

271 GARAGE 271

We hear Art BANGING AROUND in there for a beat, then he appears with a heavy duty flashlight, a can of kerosene, and, staring at the Cop the whole time, trots back into the Klopek house.

272 ANOTHER ANGLE 272

Now, from the walkie-talkie that Ricky's forgotten is still dangling from his belt, we hear Ray's voice:

Rumsfield closes his eyes. Ricky gives the Cop a half- smile and picks up the radio:

Cop looks fromRicky to Rumsfield to the Klopek house to the stoned teens. He thinks for a long, uncomfortable beat, then shrugs.

Rumsfield and Ricky watch him get into his car and drive away. Then Rumsfield rips the walkie-talkie out of Ricky's hand and makes like he's going to hurl it against the house.

Now they're waist deep, standing in about ten inches of gooey, wet mud.

Ray grunts.

Art spits in his hands.

274 ANOTHER.ANGLE 274

He starts swinging that axe like his life depended on it. And now we MOVE PAST them TO the furnace, where the intense gas fire is raging, and the needle on the tempera- ture gauge is inching ever closer to the red zone.

The sun is beginning to sink in the west, casting long shadows. Rumsfield, on the roof, checks his watch, frowns and picks up the walkie-talkie.

It's really dark in there now. Art's been collecting kerosene lamps and a torch or two to throw a little light on their work.

Ray leans back in the hole, panting heavily.

Ray nods, looks over at the furnace. It's still roaring.

Ray climbs out of the hole and goes over to the furnace.

Night is falling. Ricky's friends light candles on the porch. Ricky stands at the foot of the driveway, looking up the darkened street.

Rumsfield fumbles with the radio on the roof.

Steve leans out from the porch.

278 ANOTHER ANGLE 278

He runs inside. Rumsfield fools with the radio. None of Ricky's friends pay any attention as the Klopeks' black Pontiac crawls up the street.

The FURNACE NOISE racks the block again. Immediately the Klopek car stops, pauses, and reverses back up the street.

Art takes another mighty swing with his axe and CLANK! -- strikes something hard and metallic. He and Ray freeze.

fiT The crypt ...

He swings several more times, each one landing with a CLANK.

fiT They got him in a steel box or something. (looks up at Ray) I'm gonna go get my blowtorch.

Art hauls himself out of the hole and dashes up the stairs. Ray slides down into the goo and starts to work loose dirt from around the metal piece. He leans toward it and sniffs.

Art dashes over Ray's lawn for his house, yelling at Rums field:

fiT We found it!!

281 RUMS FIELD 281

smiles to himself.

282 ART 282

disappears into his garage. Ricky and his friends are in the house. And now another car turns down the street ...and pulls into Walter's driveway.

283 RUMS FIELD 283

sees it, frowns, and slides down toward the lip of the roof for a closer look.

A middle-aged man gets out of the driver's side and walks around the rear of the car to the trunk. Then a woman, presumably his wife, gets out of the passenger door. The man hauls an aluminum walker out of the trunk and brings it up to the back door of the car. Then he and the woman help Walter out of the back seat and onto his feet. He grips the walker, obviously weak.

285 RICKY 285

comes out of his house with a can of Budweiser hanging from the plastic grip.

He stops as Rumsfield points a shaky finger across the street. Ricky stops.

Rumsfield, his hands trembling, stutters into his radio.

And now here comesArt trotting down the sidewalk hauling a five foot tank of butane with a blowtorch attachment.

287 FRONT WALK 287

At the foot of Klopeks' frontwalk, Art catches Ricky's eye. Ricky points to Walter's driveway. Art looks at Walter's driveway. Sees Walter. And his world falls apart. Rumsfield craps a brick ashe spots the Klopeks' car rolling up the street. Followed by a police cruiser.

Ricky spins to Art.

And he tears ass into the street,waving his arms.

Both cars stop. Walter watches from his driveway. And the Barkelow Kid breaksfrom his laps to geta closer look.

Ray chips away atthe dirt, paying no attention to the MANIC SQUAWKS coming over theRADIO. Now we hear a BREATHY, HISSING SOUND from somewhere in the basement. Ray drops his troweland wipes his shirt over his face.

289 ANOTHER ANGLE 289

He tries to claw his way out of the muck. Art charges the basement steps.

Art does an about-face and charges back up the stairs. Ray, halfway out of the hole, knocks over a couple of torches, trying to extinguish them.

TWO COPS, the Klopeks, Ricky and Rumsfield stand in front of the house, while Ricky's friends watch from the porch. Art comes blasting out the front door.

291 KLOPEK PLACE 291

BLOOEY! The Klopek place is devoured in a hideous, concussion-packed FIREBALL. All the neighborhood WINDOWS BLOW OUT, splinters of wood and debris rain down as everyone crouches behind the police car.

292 NEIGHBORHOOD 292

The explosion is followed by an ominous silence, save for the sound of a couple of BOARDS DROPPING in the street and Ricky's friends commenting on the grand finale. -

And various pieces of house settle to earth.

293 POLICE CAR 293

as five or six heads slowly poke up, looking at the - carnage.

294 llEVEllSE-HOUSE 294

What's left of it, anyway. About three walls and the entire second story are history.

295 RICKY AND RUMSFIELD 295

look at each other. Art peels himself off the cement.

296 WRECKAGE 296

Now, from behind a section of wall, staggers out a blackened, smoldering man.

He jumps up.

297 RAY 297

in a different zone entirely, stunned by the blast. He's clutching a doorknob.

298 COPS 298

look at Reuben Klopek.

Reuben nods, dazed.

299 RAY 299

Art runs up to him and grabs him by the shoulders.

Ray sees nothing, hears nothing, stumbling through the debris like a zombie. Art trots alongside, trying to get through to him.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 111.

300 RUMSFIELD 300

turns to Jleuben.

Reuben looks at him. HOLD a beat, and ...

Carol and Dave turn down the street. Carol gasps.

302 CAROL'S POV 302

Three firetrucks, half a dozen squad cars, helicopters with floodlights hovering overhead, an ambulance, fire hoses, the bomb squad, the gas company and about fifty curious onlookers all holding flashlights and torches trample the block.

CAROL {0.5.) Oh God. Please don't let it be our house. Please ...

303 ANGLE ON ART 303

handcuffed and bent over the hood of a squad car, argues with two plainclothesmen, MULROONEY and BURR.

Art cranes his neck around to look at the Klopeks as they talk to a uniformed cop with a notepad.

304 KLOPEKS 304

As Burr wanders over to get part of the statement.

305 RAY 305

sits up on a gurney with an ace bandage around his head and over one eye.

Mulrooney stands over him reading a list of charges.

Ray stares straight ahead, wordlessly.

Carol breaks through.

306 ART 306

is being led, handcuffed, to a squad car. Rumsfield follows, while Ricky and his friends watch from outside the police line. Art yells at the Klopeks:

And now they pass Ray.

Ray leaps off the gurney, clutching Art's shirt.

Rumsfield tries to separate them.

Ray pulls away from the paramedic and continues.

Ray's speech is ended. Everyone's quiet.

THE 'BURBS - Rev. 4/27/88 115.

Ray sighs. Falls back on the gurney. The paramedics strap him in and start to roll him toward the ambulance. Carol trots alongside.

307 STREET 307

They load him in. Everybody on the street starts to break it up. Reuben and Hans stand in the rubble of their house. Rumsfield puts his arm around Bonnie, looks down and sees Ricky at his side as the cops load Art into a squad car. Ricky smiles broadly.

As the paramedics START the ENGINE, Ray just stares at the ceiling, totally wiped out. A doctor squats nearby, his back turned to him. The DRIVER turns around.

As the ambulance pulls off, he watches Hayfield Place fall away, perhaps relieved that he's finally escaping. The Klopek house smolders, sending a greasy black cloud up to hover over the street.

The fire trucks, the squad cars, the neighbors, the madness all get smaller and smaller. He lays his head back down on the gurney. It's calm and quiet in the ambulance, the first peace he's known in a week.

310 RAY 310

Relax, yes. Relax. Ray sighs, starts to forget every- thing. It's all history now. He can start over. Then, suddenly, he frowns. "You just relax, Mr. Peterson?" Gee, that voice sounded familiar ...He looks to his right.

It's Werner Klopek. And he's loading a horse syringe with a clear liquid. He looks at Ray and smiles knowingly.

Squirt!

Ray craps. Dr. Klopek dabs some alcohol on his arm. Panicked, Ray jerks his head up. Out the back window, his world gets farther and farther away.

The ambulance, with Ray trapped inside, pulls around the corner and disappears into the night.

313 ANGLE ON KLOPEK HOUSE DEBRIS 313

Hans pokes through the carnage and finds something of interest. He picks it up. It's a bone. He nudges Uncle Reuben.

Reuben snatches the bone out of his hand, hides it behind his back, and looks around to see if anybody's spotted him.

314 STREET 314

And at the end of the street, the Barkelow Kid gets back on his bikeand starts doing his laps again.