"PORKYS" (1981)

MUSIC CRASHES in over a black screen; heavy, sensual,

rhythm and blues with a hard sexual beat. We FADE UP on a i full screen SHOT of a pulsating red neon sign which is

tilted diagonally across the screen. The sign reads:

P

It undulates and throbs like a living sexual being. MUSIC CONTINUES as CAMERA PULLS BACK to see Porky's, a wicked- - looking redneck joint which is built out over the waters of a swamp. A little bridge leads to Porky's main entrance. The wild throbbing MUSIC comes from within. CAMERA BEGINS TO MOVE IN a slow dreamlike manner TOWARD the front door,

WARPING WEIRDLY as it does sc. .As we approach the entrance, [4

the MUSIC SWELLS in volume and intensity. CAMERA MOVES THROUGH the door and inside. The club is filled with bizarre people; full-bearded hillbillies, mean-looking crackers in overalls, bad asses and honky tonk women all leering and threatening. CAMERA LOOKS UP to see a huge pig-like face lunge INTO VIEW. The face grins lewdly and beckons the

CAMERA to come on in: The face begins to back away as CAMERA.

MOVES IN TOWARD the bar. Finally the pig face steps aside and above us we see a wild, absurdly buxom woman in G-string and pasties. She is flanked by other equally lurid sirens. They undulate and throb exactly like the Porky's sign. The effect is both comic and provocative. The pig face keeps popping IN AND OUT OF THE FRAME beckoning; the lusty women writhe madly in step with the MUSIC which is ever building in intensity. Now we start to hear a LOW RUMBLE OF VOICES. We can barely hear them, but we finally realize they are all chanting: "Get it at Porky's," "Get it at Porky's." This phrase builds in volume until the end of the scene. Now the wild ladies are beginning to thrust themselves against the CAMERA which somehow seems to welcome the action. Finally the MUSIC and CHANT build to a climax, and the women give themselves over to the CAMERA in a convulsive sexual ritual. We are spared overt lewdness by the darkness of the bar's dim lighting. The crescendo holds as the bacchanal cor ~inues

until we make an inexplicable... .

y

2s

DAY ; ; . _ . ;

sleeping, obviously in the throes of a dream. A smug little grin lights up Pee Wee's face and he moans softly. We still hear the pulsing MUSIC and the CHANTING from Porky's and we realize we have been seeing Pee Wee's dream. Pee Wee is seventeen and five feet four inches tall and continually the butt of short jokes. That fact dominates his life; that and the fact that he is the horniest little bastard who ever. lived. As the dream continues the CAMERA PULLS BACK FROM Pee Wee's semi-comatose face to TAKE IN his whole body length. About mid-section of Pee Wee's body, underneath the blankets, we see a suspicious protrusion, a slight rise. Could it be? The CHANTING and SINGING from Porky's BEGIN TO FADE until it's only a murmur. 0O.S. we hear a voice:

Pee Wee doesn't stir. CAMERA STILL HOLDS. A sly little sleepy grin spreads across his face. _Obviously the dream continues. Our suspicions deepen.

With a little BUZZ, the CLOCK RADIO beside Pee Wee’s bed

HUMS to life; a sonorous VOICE speaks: "Good morning, Port Auburndale, this is Gene Morrison here on Florida's fabulous Gold Coast. The temperature this morning is seventy degrees and... etc." Pee Wee stirs from his stupor. He blinks and tries to awaken. Finally he throws the blanket off and our suspicions are confirmed. The bulge in Pee Wee's pajamas reveals the adolescent's eternal affliction; the unfulfilled wet dream erection known in the vernacular as a piss hard-on. Pee Wee looks down at his affliction. He grunts and plops his head back on the pillow. Suddenly the bedroom door flies open and his MOTHER's cheerful face pops into the doorway. Startled, not to say embarrassed, Pee Wee does a half Leap, half roll over to land flat on his stomach, there- by pranging his erected penis fiercely into the bed with his

full weight.

She stops, seeing Pee Wee's contorted face. | (CONTINUED)

)

va

aaroneananeel

CONTINUED: ZA

omen

&>

Pee Wee..

is something wrong?

Pee Wee, in agony, plants a frozen little smile on his face

and covers up.

No, Mom, j

little mug nothing. Oh well, t you to drq His car wd way --

His mother drones of Wee lies frozen in yf Finally his mother ]

up agony. He rolls hands. His face te]

Aggggrrrry Ohhhhhhhhh

Finally the hurt sta his disaster and moda

t

} for another thirty seconds while Pee lace, the little smile set like Jello. eaves and Pee Wee gives vent to his pent- on his back, grabs his crotch with both ls the story.

rts to go away.

Pee Wee looks down at ns.

‘PEE WEE.

(cdntinuing)

_ Instant eynuch! Argh! _ 2a

Pee Wee snaps to. He throws the covers bff and starts to

get up. the bedside drawer.

reaches BELOW CAMERA with the object. tently on what he is doing for a moment then pulls the object up in front of his face to examine it. It is a

ruler. Pee Wee looks discouraged as he sees by his finger Mark on the ruler that he has measured off only four inches). ‘PEE WEE (continuing)

Shit!

He throws the ruler little height chart

He leans over quickly and takes| something out. of 9¢.

He lies back down on the bed and He concentrates in-

2.0 es

down and turns to thej/ wall. There is a for Pee Wee's penis.

OD 2. CONTINUED: -(2) 20 oh _ 1954 «1955 1956. [1957 6" : 5" 4" . . . _ . 3" _ . = . : 2" - ~ ~- 1" | LE PEE WEE ——— —| (continuing) Jesus... it is. It's getting

Shit!

shoxter.

only hung up about his height. He marks t size and bolts OUT OF FRAME. CAMERA HOLDS or a moment, then PANS UP TO the wall behind hich is covered with photos of Pee Wee's school days. ITLES BEGIN as we PAN these photos which give us a glimpse of Port Auburndale circa 1950. We see the team basketballl picture which shows us Pee Wee and some of his pals who will populate our tale. We see Pee Wee's basketball teammates, Billy McCarty, Tommy Turner, Tim Cavanaugh and Brian Swartz. The Port Auburndale Flying A's football team shows us Anthony "Meat" Tupperelo and Mickey Jarvis. The title sequence gives us a feeling for the early 50's period on|Florida's Gold Coast and introduces us to - our principal layers. We END on a SHOT of Port Auburndale

High which mesons ANIMATED and we find ourselves at:

Pee Wee is no down the curr on the chart

Pee Wee's bed

CAMERA HOLDS on the school for several beats, then pulls back to find BILLY McCARTY pulling by in foreground in a 1950 two- door Chevy. We recognize Billy as one of the basketball players we saw in Pee Wee's team photo. - _——

3A. ne ‘TOMMY TURNER comes wheeling up beside’ him. Tommy is a winner, cool, shrewd, well-liked, a natural under-achiever, mischievous,

irresponsible, and completely unpredictable. They yell at one another.

Cy , TOMMY ee a Does a fat dog fart?

: / : | | (CONTINUED)

BA . 5,

eo 3 CONTINUED: -— . BILLY * Whak's he look like? TOMMY

Like a fuckin' Zulu man. He's six four

with two huge gold teeth!

BILLY : of

No shit! BB:

They pull intp the parking lot and into paring spaces. BILLY (continued)

Where'd you find him? TOMMY - Works for my old man's construction

company, dumb as a turd, but willing to kill for ten bucks.

-_ | aan

MARVIN, known as Highpockets, is a parking lot monitor. Highpockets is the classical teenage toady. His every waking hour is devoted to pleasing the power structure, the adult world. Thus, he is the natural enemy of everv other kid in school. Symptomatic of Highpocket's betrayal is the fact |Ithat he wears his pants where every mother wants them worn,| above the hips, just below the belly button. He walks toward our guys. . 7 . my BILLY ... it's a plane, no! It's Highpockets! Lf NN

As if on.cue, Billy and Tommy pull their low-slung Levis up above their navels, the seams riding ridiculouslly into their crotches and the cuffs above their ankles. They look quite - comical. This is an old routine. They walk along be- ‘ude Highpockets. ~ ‘

(- . TOMMY . . Hi ya, Marvin, how they hangin’? NV

ar

Vareaet

MARVIN

You're npt supposed to spinout,

Turner. | I'm giving: you a demerit. TOMMY (mock tragic) Oh, my God! BILLY You realty dress neat, Marvin. But

I just. wondered what do you do with

your test

icles when you wear your

They are taken aback.

Mal

Th

pants sojhigh? Sure looks crowded.

Marvin has never had a comeback.

i MARVIN

. Listen, Turner, I know you think I'm a square and a jerk, but ten years

- from now, when I'm president of a big corporation or Attorney General of ‘the state, you guys'll be hanging your beer bellies over a pool table, shooting pool for nickels and dimes. Then we'll see who laughs?

rvin walks on, leaving the stunned duo staring after him.

By stop and look off toward a large RUMBLE coming 0.S.

LONG SHOT ~| MICKEY'’S CUT-DOWN PICKUP

MICKY JARVIS ROARS into the parking lot in a fierce-looking

black pickup.

Mickey is a gocd ol' Southern boy, clever and

quick, a bit of a clown but tough and pugnacious as we shall

find out.

n unusual kid.

VY

de lL ; 7.

MED. SHOT

- THE PARKING LOT - TOMMY AND BILLY

TOMMY 2 Co Oh no! |

Tommy and Billy and abeut ten other people walking the

cd

gravel parking lot allijstart running like crazy to get off the dirt and gravel before Mickey can get to them. Most of |

them, including Billy and Tommy, are too late. Mickey does _a long looping pinwheel, throwing tons cf gravel and dust over the hapless victims. We are lost in the cloud of dust. CAMERA HOLDS until it qlears. We see a line of people about thirty yards long covered with heavy white dust. They curse Mickey as they shake themselves free of the dust shower.

At that moment, Marvinj comes up behind Mickey's car.

if you...

That's as far as he gets. Mickey spins out, sendirlg a volu- minous spray of gravel and dust hurtling into the poor kid's

face.

Mickey joins Tommy and Billy.

BL

Y

Mickey parks, jumps out and walks past the Juckless Marvin who can't see a thing.

two demerits!

_ MICKEY Did ya get the nigger...?

. MICKEY Fuck you and the horse you rode in on!

«

They laugh.

CONTINUED: b Q

<<:

Fuck you

ae

on? That's colorful redneck humor,

right?

MICKEY

Right, and kiss my rebel ass! $s . :

TOMMY

That's another cone!

BILLY

Right! ypu should be writing these

down.

MICKEY

Go back to Michigan and rub asses

' with all\ithe Negroes you want!

This is Dixie, baby.

TOMMY

Hey Jarvis, how come you don't have four firgt names like most Hillbillies?

You know, Sally Sue

Hey, man! Billy Joe

Lv}

Billy Joe Jim Bob or Flora Mae,

war, SO watch what you're sayin'.

MICKEY (CONT'D)

Anyway, did you get a Nee~-grow?

TOMMY

Yeah! Yeah, we got one.

Guy's 6'4' lookin‘ me

Oh man,. oh when this going?

Tommy !

WENDY (0.S.)

C) 6 CONTINUED:

They} turn to see WENDY. Elfish, sassy-looking, Wendy is a. rarity; a sexually adventurous girl who still commands. respect despite her promiscuity. She is perturbed at this moment.

_— . | TOMMY Hi, Wendy!

- TOMMY I found a place that's got one. _I'll go tomorrow.

She goes off muttering to herself.

TOMMY , Pee Wee! Didn't you hear about the other night?

_ | (CONTINUED)

C)

6C

CONTINUED: | (2)

fixed him up

£ $

Pee Wee and Wendy? hpd better taste.

vess what?

What? rubber on.

Oh, bullshit.

Ljiswear! Wendy told me.

BILLY

MICKEY

BILLY , The little bastard already had a

BILLY

I thought she

All he had to do was knock it off. They were making out and you know Wendy, she reaches down and unzips his fly and grabs his cock -- and &

Why would

she lie? That horny little mother wdre a rubber to his date.

TOMMY

She got so pissed off she wouldn't l@t him touch her.

MICKEY

‘What's she gonna do?

TOMMY

OFF CAMERA we hear a voice.

Hey wait up.

PEE WEE

Just wait you'll find out.

w

They whirl exhund to see Pee Wee.

4 PEE WEE

Hey] man, this is serious. Don't scraw around. I'm going tonight,

right?

MICKEY

She llives with a big black nigger, Pee Wee. If he catches you, he'll

cut your pecker off.

BILLY ; -Yeaht He's bringing a pair of tweezers,

' PEE WEE

I don't care if she lives with a

blue!|ass baboon. She likes to screw, right?

TOMMY

Loves it, man. Can't get enough. | Espe¢ially young guys. The more’

the merrier.

PEE WEE

What}s she look like? Is she good-

looking?

BILLY

Not bad. Great body. Moves like

an eél.

MICKEY

You like 'em any way, as long as

they're not dead.

VY

em. That's

(2)

I don't ¢ long as ¢

PEE WEE

fare if they're dead, us

hey're not too cold.

BILLY

Sick... sick...

Hey, look

Many guysi.

get her ¢}

Listen to

even invit

the guest

PEE WEE

, let's not bring too That way we can ail wice.

. PEE WEE

(vgice rising)

Listen, I

™m going! You bastards

. you're not cutting me out of

free nooky.

They give Pee Wee thé old horse laugh and start off to-

ward school.

LA

V/

Pee We

e runs after them.

Hey, wait a minute a minute, I want to show you something.

e catches up to them.

I got something terrific figured out. Better than getting laid.

ll.

wt

TA

CONTINUED: (3)

TOMMY

Here we BO again...

No shit.

getting laid.

12*

Here's what you do.

Pee Wee takes off his watch and doubles up the gold-plated

flex watchband so finger.

Okay, nov, real slow like,

in and o

What the about?

Pee Wee takes the w Look! Li

Pee Wee slowly, sen

out of the watchbanid. on his face. He looks at them.

te Okay, try

Tommy looks at the the watchband and d

(c

Slow... Tr

feel like?

It feels finger in

He hands +

PEE WEE

t of the loop.

TOMMY

atch back.

hell are you talking

that it forms a loop about the size of a t to Tommy and says:

hold it like that and stick your finger

mously pushes his m He has a ridicu

pthers as if to say pes as instructed.

bal slow... what's 3

it. Really slow..|

i

ddle finger in and.

ous look of ecstasy

"oh boy.'' He takes

\/ | a \/ (CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: (4) —~

Tne others laugh.

i Oh, man. ft fee

. Just like pussy. ?

The others laugh at Pee We

MI

How would you know, Pee Wee

he's despezate.

prove it.

PERK WEE

Pee Wee grabs the watth. back.

a PEE WEE It's just like pussy. You got no ‘imagination. Here, c'mon. [I'll

GC .

cetmemeemene een ead

qa

re

Is like puspy.

e.

CKEY | oe

CAMERA PICKS UP a pert, sweet little girl as she makes

her way across the Patio before school. She bring

- Cavanaugh and several othe

racist; not racist in the of Mickev, but anarv and q accepted by the guys, but piace to explode. Meat is thick of mind as well as b but not truly mean. The l

. . MIN Hil My name is you something?

Tim and the other guys sup just shrugs.

ere everyone hangs out us to Meat, and Tim

guys. Tim is wiry, driven, penign and mindless manner ightened. Tim is me is a bomb looking for a an All American tackle, dy. He is truly tough, ittle girl addresses Meat. DY Mindy. Can I ask

press a laugh. Meat

\/

LY

_ CONTINUED:

Wendy Wi They look to see Wendy and several other girls across

the Patio. They are giggling. Now we know why Meat got his nickname. |:

She did,| huh? Uh~huh. | Why do they cajl you Meat...

cause you're sco big?

The guys are breakiing up now.

Yeah,

Not sorta! Why?

Meat looks at the panes guys. thd

You really wanta know?

This girl hasn'

YES!

Meat looks at the pther guys as if

I do?’

Okay.

No, Meat! She's only a f

Right senio

The guys break up.

Hey, that

This sinks in.

Aw, shoot!

samanneaal

MINDY

<

s

MEAT

MINDY

MEAT

t afclue.

MINDY

TIM .

MEAT ; 7 After this, she' Xe ; :

"TIM

listen Meat, if you that. schd again, you'll

sch Meat turns to the

MINDY

ame Seer remeron

Yo BA

‘oatnamermanl

larship to Princeton.

13A. *

lliams said I should ask ya! | <4 2,

——

y are breaking up.

to say, ‘what can

you. reshman!

11 be an instant

get mever get

girl and shrugs.

CONTINUED \/

13B. g CONTINUED: e 8

() Mindy is thoroughly perplexed. Wendy and the girls

are egging her on. We see Pee Wee approach. Mindy leaves. We hold on her as we see her walking back to Wendy and the others. We hear Pee Wee off

camera.

s

PEE WEE? (0O.S.)} Hey Tim, Meat, I want to show you something.

We continue to hear Pee Wee fexplain the watch band bit

as we see Wendy and the others explaining "Meat's" nickname. When Mindy understands, she drops her

books and squeals. CUT TO: eC

We PAN UP from Meat's ‘finger and the watchband to the faces of Pee Wee, Meat and the guys.

Mickey, Billy, Tommy and se tantly.

Everyone breaks up.

DU

bands.

eaaamenmeel

Pee Wee turns around to see six guys fingering theiy

He has been had, leans against the rail sulk ting all the guys to take t All six guys poise themselv When they are all ready, Tommy calls out:

TOMMY

14%

cia

Pee Wee urges Meut

Yeah, that’s it..}. now, what's that MEA

It feels like I'm finger in.a watch

PEE

‘Oh, man... what a

MIC Call Wendy... tel

emergency!

veral other guys all wait expec- on with a soft seductive voice.

WEE '

2) 3 that's it. Yeah

feel like?

iT . sticking my and...

Pee Wee is completely deflated.

TOMMY

No wonder he's fl sits in study hal his watchband.

there's no

unking out. He l all day fucking

heir watchbands off. They do so.

Hey, Pee Wee!

bands in perfect unison. 0

expression of mock ecstasy you've ever hang open. they finger away.

Their eyes are Pee Wee'

courtyard is breaking up. Pee Wee stands his ground. begins shooting birds -- frantically at everybody wth both

hands. Suddenly, Pee Wee looks away as something.

The cthers turn

es with fingers in their watch-

~~ _Sé SE watch- n each faceiis the most nidiculous. seen. Their /mouths

glazed, they all moan softly as

s defeat is!total, Half]v:e Finally, the six break up also.

He puts higb hands to hig side and

if he has sedén

cur TO:

8G

6G

——— q

os

utual.

|

THE TERROR OF PORT

oesn't Like men.

15.”

AUBURNDALE HIGH APPROACHING

Tommy-speaks with oily insincerity.

TOMMY

Good morning, Miss Balbricker. My, you look nice this morning.

Miss Balbricker looks like a bomb shelter. Tommy'

makes the hair raise on the back of her neck.

years.

Miqkey grimaces in mock pain grabbing 4

tony looks after Balbricker.

mp start toward school.

MISS BALBRICKER, known as "Kong," the girls' Phys Ed teacher +- 5'10" and 240 pounds of square-jawed Teutonic fury. She jalks by giving Tommy a withering look.

Tommy is her pet hate.

Miss Balbricker The feeling is

tH

P sarcasm

Miss Balbricker has been gaining weight exponentially for

She stops and glares. Unable to come up with a

suitable rejoinder, she stalks off.

MICKEY 4

es}

Whew! You like to live dangerously,

Turner.

~ BILLY | . She wants a piece of your as

. TOMMY Bull dyke bitch.

MICKEY

5, man.

C'mon, Turner, we all know you been waiting all your life to ball Miss

Balbricker...

“TOMMY

I'd rather beat a porcupine ¢£

death with my prick.

ris crotch.

é

wr

“not Enaware of Brackett. . o

o | 16, fNTT)GYM OF PORT AUBURNDALE HIGH - DAY

The players are shooting baskets as they wait for practice to begin. Along with Billy, Tommy, Pee Wee and Tim, we see BRIAN SCHWARTZ, a second semester transfer to Port Aubuyndale. He seems to be a loner and hasn't fit in as yet. | And he doesn't seem to care. ,

Two assistant coaches look on -- COACH BRACKETT and COACH WARREN. Brackett is probably no more than twenty-three

and has just joined the coaching staff of "The Flying A's." Brackett is extremely attractive and engaging, and is the sort pf coach who wants to be "one of the boys." He's single and on the make. Coach Warren was not dissimilar when he was Brackett's age, but at thirty, with a wife

and three kids, he's become more of a company man. Still, he cah enjoy a good laugh.

eee

|©

“FLYING A" CHEERLEADERS

troop out of the locker room to their practive area, by a sinuous woman with blonde hair, an enticingly ty face, and a virtually flawless body. This is MISS YWELL, one of Miss Balbricker's fellow gym teachers coach of the cheerleaders. We see Wendy Williams

the cheerleaders. She spots Pee Wee and puts her hands up to her face and flattens her nose,.eyes and mouth with her fingers, mocking Pee Wee. Pee Wee looks disgruntled. Now we see Coach Brackett eyeing Miss Honeywell. She is

COACH BRACKETT

Boy, would I like to get next to that... *

COACH BRACKETT | What? Lassie? Why do you call her Lassie?

COACH’ WARREN Why do you think?

Warren stops and lets out a little quiet howl like the baying of a hound. \/ . (CONTINUED)

, CO

(continui Are you kiddinyp’? dog?

food cake. You

ee

get you for fuck3

Cod You can tell me w Lassie.

Warren walks off leaving Br

\

What are you talk

He follows Warren. The las

is Warren saying...

|

|

ll LOCKER ROOM - DAY

We

Are you nugs?

see Pee Wee's face peering between the flat

CH BRACKETT

You call] her a That's ange] ouch her and the

food and drug administration will

ng food,

\CH BRACKETT hy they call her

lackett hanging. CH BRACKETT y

ing about?

t words we hear before we CUT

\ i

LA

b that form

the upper wall of the locker room, He is peerfing down onto the gym floor. BILLY (0.S.) Well? PEE WEE

Those broads never take a

PEE

The girls' tumbling team's gone in. MICKEY

about the Majorettes?

They're still there!

shower. What

WEE

\

C77

MED. SHOT - INCLUDING BILLY, MICKEY, TIM AND M

They are obviously looking at Brian who is dre

other side of the room.

ssing at the

Mispronouncing the racial slur.

I notice you're still including yourself in.

| TIM Pussy is pussy, man. I just don't know why we gotta invite some friggin' Kite...

TIM | He's a prick -- and a Jewish prick at that,

. BILLY - Alright, Tim. We won't ask him. But you're an asshole, you know,

. BILLY ” Hold on, Pee Wee. I gotta finish | dressing.

CUT TO::

The boys crawl under the gym.

Saeed

128 138 13¢

13A) We see the boys crawl into’ the crawl space béneath the gym, then make|their way from one opening into

another.

13B) A LONG SHOT of thelboys crawlingj on their stomachs

underneath a very jow cement flopr.

~ 13¢) LONG SHOT looking ¢hrough a crack in a wall.| The boys climb up ontoja long alleyway filled with

pipes.

stones and crawl up into the spate.

it

14 INT? GIRL'S

As tthe boys

are jon their way out of the shower room. All thpy see are three departing little asses. Then, we hear| "Kongj"

theme MUSIC.

+ There's are pregnant pause. The guys hold their breaths.

They run toward the crack and dislodge some

SHOWER ROOM - PEE WEE'S pov ~ pay. |YA IHG

begin their voyeuring, the last of the girls

Miss Balbricker steps into the shower room.

Miss Balbricker Knows something is wrong, but she doesn't

know what.

Finally, she turns the lights out and leaves.

| UY D PEE WEE Damn it, I told you we were going tojmiss them.

\V/

lan O 14

15 _

CONTINUED: ub D

MICKEY

Pee Wee}, you're sonna pet laid by an exotj.c dancer in a couple of hours. | That's a real woman.

Pee Wee SPLITS FRAME. Mickey and Billy look after him quiz- zically. Mickey gays:

_ MICKEY Warm up7

Billy shrugs, indicating puzzlement. They SPLIT FRAME, —_— CUT TO:

We HOLD-TIGHT on a pair of flaming red eyes. NIGHT SOUNDS are exploding AROUND US. FROGS, CRICKETS, NIGHTBIRDS, form a mighty chorus. THEME MUSIC is primal, slightly ominous. HOLD this for a long moment until, in the distance, we

hear a faint DIS-HARMONIOUS SOUND. After a moment, we rea- lize that it is the BLARE OF A RADIO and it is moving closer.

It is coming from a vehicle and it is bearing down on us.

The red eyes blink and the alligator to which they are attached whirls around and kerplunks heavily into the road- side canal. CAMERA. PANS in time to see Mickey's pickup loom up and ROAR past. ae

The three conspirators, Billy, Mickey, and Tommy, are sit- ting in the cab. The victims, Pee Wee, Meat, Tim, and the two other guys, FRANK BELL and STEVE KLINGERHOFER, are

riding in the truck bed.

\{, oon?

| TOMMY

They're both there already. And I drew Cherry

Conklin myself. a map, No sweat.

; TOMMY Yeah! professional name.

Cherry Forever.

I took

wy

That's her

MICKEY

Cherry Forever... me?

‘TOMMY

are you shitting

That's her professional name. What

can I tell ya!

" MICKEY ‘(pounding gleefully on the steering

‘ie Beautiful... beautiful. I can't wait, man. I can't wait. BILLY

Just be cool!

Tim leans over from the truck wind blows in his face.

TIM

bed to_ talk to the cab. The

Why the hell would she live way out

here?

‘In the Everglades.

MICKEY

If you were shackin'

up with a big

ass nigger and screwing everybedy in sight, where would you live?

PEE WEE

Hot damn!

The truck pulis to a halt and

be quiet and steps quietly out yards away, we see a simple

distance about three hundred two-room cabin nestled in the

Step on it!

A

|

Tommy signals everybody ts of the truck, Off in the

jungle.

V

[TA ?

A yellow light gleams}! in the window. Tommy listens for a long moment, then ne cups his hand to his mouth and. gives out a pretty good imitation of a night owl. He does this three times}, Billy suppresses a laugh. Tim is more skeptical than ever. Suddenly we see the lights in the cabin flash on and off twice. Tommy stands up.

go.

They all pile out of Fhe truck and head toward the cabin, As Tim moves PAST CAMERA , we hear him mutter to himself.

The guys enter the shack. If is devoid of furniture ex- cept for some old couch cushions and a 1934 model refrigera-. tor and a table with a hot plate. The floor is littered with expended cans of food and beer. It's a real dump.

/

He and Billy go through the door into the bedroom, leaving the others standing around lgoking dumb,

MEAT

What's going on?

PEE WEE

They're first. But I got sloppy

seconds, a

MEAT

Your ass, Pee Wee, {I'm second. PEE WEE

Hell, no. If you go first, she'll be so reamed out, nobody else’ 11 be able to touch the gides.

Tommy. and Billy re-enter thejroom.

- TOM Okay, Cherry's ready. Everybody get your clothes off..-

. (CONTINUED)

CONT'D

CONTINUED: IGA

Etc...

TOMMY

She's done this so much she's practidally a doctor.

All eyes turn toward Pee Wee. He's already undressed, un- dressed and ready to go. There's jgeneral laughter. The

ice is broken.

Everyone breaks up.

guys. They are definitely turned on and hooked

(CONFINUED) ¢

V/

ay

CONTINUED: (2)

24..

Ie D

Cherry hams it up real good. She swings towayd the mes-

merized group like a cobra. Cherry is a profe with a ready line of patter and it's not only stuff, she's pretty damned quick and clever. gins her inspection like a general inspecting We SHOOT FROM BEHIND THEIR BACKS to avoid fron

NES Tomy [8 F Cherry, this is Steve.

Suddenly in the classical prescribed manner o doctor,| Cherry reaches her hand opt and place under Skeve's testicles. She says as she loo

and conrerned...

_ CHERRY (continuing) Cough,

This brtaks everybody up. Cherry! moves on.

next.

IS TOMMY

And this is Pee Wee!

Billy and Tommyjlaugh conspiratorially. Obv

have put Cherryjup to this.

CHERRY

Pee Wee knows hé's being had.

. CHERRY | We'llihave to tie a board across

vVvooy

sssional routine Cherry be- the troops. ntal nudity.

IP

f the army

s her f ks, sty

Pee We

Lously,

What d'ya wear for a jdekstrap, ki @ peanut shell and.a rubber band?

mo

his ass or he's liablejto fall in

idious

Ls

ms

they

| CONTINUED)

vv

fingers

AGG [8H vce ves KE Hey, fuck you, lady. Lod Might as wel

L ck door and fuck the world. I

Not a bad

Cherry starts to move at Tim's genital areq, then over a and then Hack to Billy. Finally: _ CHERRY (continuing) Look... itis Mutt & Jeff Pee Wee is; having a Yad time. Che TOMMY Bell.

She apprail it like a

Laughter.

(3)

size of th open the b

comeback.

How are you,

Meet Frank ses Frank' surveyor.

(de Tre's crook screwing a

She moves

And this i

' Auburndale

Cherry sta

Meat grins}

known affe

hds lookin

Sood God,

pleased.

(co

Why don't (indicating Pee | |...8ix inthes of that?

\/

This is Tir.

at pussy.

Cherry laughs TOMMY

q genitalia fo

on.

Anthony Tupfp éticnately as

g at Meat with

van oe

Jee)

oD.

dk at the

and move

r

“1 been

Port erelo, "Meat.'

awe.

tmed.

kid...

N/ \(eowrnnvtn

rry moves on.

when she stops suddenfly and stares | Pee Weel's genital] area,

fF a moment, sightihg down

»

ay

CONTINUED: (4) 7 x He

aidey “7 “TOMMY. VE is ISE

You'll need | p shoehorn tg get that

in

; : CHERRY Shpehorn, hell, I'll need a crowbari You...

(indifating Meat) ..{ at the end of the line. Hey, Pee Wee, up Front. ['11 ischedule the light work first and jwork up to |Godzilla here.

She turns and gives the classic cavalry cry ahd arm wave. | CHERRY (continuing)

Alright... let's roll ‘em out... Yo.).. hoocoo}..

As she walks finto the bedroom with |Billy and ffommy, we hear her mutter,

uv

CAMERA HOLDS on Pee Wee as he moveg to the front of the line. |

i

| PEE WEE Who}wants to! fuck a comedian? . t

| i

. First, we realize it's no bedroom at all. This is obvious-

ly just a shack the guys have rented or borrowed for the night. As for "who we're lookin' out for,'' we see Tommy and Billy helping the enormous BLACK MAN, Conklin, climb through the room's rear window. The Man is laughing as they help him through the window, and despite all of Tommy's and Billy's shushings, he keeps laughing throughout the remainder of the entire sequence. IGA

As the Black Man gets fully inside the "bedroom," Billy, signals to Cherry to begin her number. She just stares there and begins doing an exaggerated impression of a woman in orgasmic ecstasy.

et

Kv2, w

pics noes Dane

20. 22 Qu 226 2ue

Pee Wee is jumping up and -down | j | , PEE WEI ' Hey,{man, we'lre gonng get laid $ This {broad really wants it. She's hot. {| She’s ally het. CHERRY |(0.S.) Oh, Billy, you're driving me crazy. Keep humping me, baby. I'm gefting there. I'm gpnna come Oh, yes, baby} make it} happen]

Cherry is just /standing in the |middie of! the room, matter- of-faetly reeling off this erotic talk. |Meanwhize, Bill has pee the |Biack Mah a machete-type weapon, and. as the Black} Man practices brandishing it, Billy is smegring Tommy; with theatrical biood frg@m head toj toe. CHERRY Oh, Billy, you're sojgood. I fan't stand it. Oh{ suck my titties}. Bite tthem, Kéep pumping while| you bitejthem. Oh, I'm getting there. Yes. {| Oh, now! Now,{baby, now,

Therefs a hush fof sexua} excitement over the entire room. CHERRY] (0.S.) Ohhhh.... baby}.. Donf{t stop... OHHHHHHE... Suddenly the sflence is Ibroken|

Billy/takes the machete fand SMASHES THE REAR WINDOW.

The mood of sexual expedtation| turns intjo one of shock, BLACK MAN (0.S.) What's goin' dn herej, you motherfucker? T'll/kill you} white! boy. No(|white \/ boy ress with my woman, WA N/ \y \Y YY (CONfINUED)

20 22 att 226 ate 19

24 CONTINUED:

We can sense that the BlackiGuy is chuckling through his lines, but the boys|outside|are terrified. Mickey is biting his fongue to keep from blowing the gag premature- ly. Now wejhear the SOUND OF THE| MACHETE |jPOUNDING the walls, and Tommy begins to jet out a series of blood- curdling SHRIEKS. *

— TOMMY (0.$.) , don't {kill mej Putijaway that ife. Please spare me] mister. , don’t kill mej He'g the onel, was just] watching. Honest, I ear...

HHO

BLACK MAN /(0.S.)

Yqu're both dead men. Take that

matherfucker,. f We hear mora SLASHING AND SCREAMING. Billy's seraams and entreaties jioin with; Tommy’ si. Cherry is begging her "boy- friend" to show mercy as wel

BILLY: (0.S}.) Don’t killjus, mister. Please, wel're only |just boys.

.

On “two dead! men," wea have REACTION SHOTS gll around. Pee Wee, Meat, Steve and Frank are frozen with |terror, Tim remains skeptical. Mickey has lost control} and bagins

2u4 laughing, but no one notices{him, QuD ay Ke

s~] Now, suddenly, the dopr is hurled open, and a blodd-stained - | Tommy staggers into the roomjand does a very fake jdeath scene. However, it’s! enough|to convince everyone jbut Tim. the other guys are preparing|to port nake or hod. Now, to top off the charade, the Black Guy literally walks through the door, tearing itjoff its hinges), Hovaver while his actt and his|gestures are zerceious, he's ready to piss from {laughing

you peckerwqogs..

e

Mickey does his part, {turning and nunning owt the |front

door, Four bare asses spring into (flight. |Tim holds back a moment, until the Black Mam turns! toward him and bellaws. Suddenly, Tim is not sp sure. -

\/ 7 | | (CONTINUED)

poe Soeneeny ‘ + ———. b-

YH 24

29,

CONTINUED: (2) | au kK.

(The following is a chrenicle of what happens throughout the remainder of the sequence.)

Tin goes through the window in the outer room. Frank” is already through it. 2u Li.

Meat overtakes Mickey at the front door, and the two of them wrestle to see who'll get) through the door first,

——L_

Once outside, Mickey and Meat take off in the same direction, Mickey egging Br Meat with cries of terror.

Pee Wee takesJoff on his own, running like the wind, his little ass like the tail of a deer bobbing up and down

through the weods. i ase

‘Steve falls down the front gtairs, which causes him to look , - ' back and see that Tommy, Billy and the Black Guy are stand-

ing- in the doorway laughing.

Now the ones who've discovered the gag becbme part of it,

With Billy and Tommy egging on the Black Gpy and encouraging

him to yell and shriek more, those three . take off after Mickey and Meat.

Mickey, feigning fatigue and injury, drops some fifty feet behind Meat. Meat is plowing through the swamp like a man possessed, destroying everything in his path.

Now we hear the bellowing of the Black Man, followed by the death-cries of Mickey.

MICKEY

Meat, help me! Piease help me! He's got me, gonna kili me... Aarrrrrgghhh...t}

There's ro way Meat's going back te help his buddy. He

just staggers forward, trying to accelerate his pace.

Af

-n—

ever

vai EXT. A WOODSY PORTION OF THE EVERGLADES - NIGHT

Pee Wee is racing along, far away from the action, but oblivious to any consideration other than flight.

é

Meat comes upon a shallow pool of water. He is exhausted. He gets an idea,

He reaches over and breaks off a bamboo

reed.

OMIT id

TWO COUNTY COPS are on patrol.

Slow night.

Cop #2 will turn out to be TED JARVIS, Mickey|Jarvis' older brother. Ted is an ex-Port Auburndale High football star and still'a legend among the townspeople. Hefs a good

guy.

Don't worry. That'll change.

Just at that moment, Pee Wee flashes into thelr headlighits ’. heading in the opposite direction.

He goes by so fast the two Cops arf not entirely sure of

what they saw.

Wee disappear into blackness.

What'd I tell ya?

They look at each other. Ted shrugs. Cop #l turns chs Cruiser around and heads after Pee} Wee. The /headlights

“COP #1

~~

TED

They both swivel their heads {to watch Pqae

reflect off Pee Wee's little ass. | Pee Wee keeps on trucking.

I can't wait to hear this story...

COP #1.

V . NN)

Saks

CONTINUED: conT 'O | 3o 304 BoB

TED

L think I know that|;kid -- Pee Wee

Morris! . COP #1.

The ‘basketball player? TED ’

Yep. He's a friend |of my brother

Mickey's.

. COP #1

Well, what should we do?

Ted looks at his partner and girins.

Cop #1 laughs and reaches up, putting on the red flashing light. Ted pulls on the SIREN| The car pulls up beside - Pee Wee. Ted leans out and says:

- TED © Ceontinuing) Okay, buddy, pull ove

bt 4

r.

Pee Wee looks up. Suddenly hejswoons and disappears comic-~ ally from view.

Billy, Tommy, the Black Guy and the others are closing in on Meat, the Black Guy getting into it now, bellowing for all he's worth.

Suddenly they're stopped by a bizarre SOUND ~- LIKE THE TRUMPETING OF AN ELEPHANT, Befuddled, they slow their pece.

The group comes upon the pool of water where we last saw Meat. The grotesque SOUND is louder now, right under foot. They look down into the pool of water, and there's Meat, lying in water that's too shallow even to cover his torso, trying to hide from his would-be assailant and making the

bizarre sound we've been hearing by breathing -~ heaving

is more like it -- through the reed. Everyone convulses with laughter. .

.

The Deadbeat is a joint on an undeveloped part of Port Auburndale beach. It is a hangout for Port Auburndale High.

It consists of a package store, a raunchy bar and. an even raunchier restaurant with stools and tables. It is always

. crowded and a great deal of sccializing goes. on in the park- -ing lot. _ 3B,

A SOUND CUT. Wd see Mickey lying on his back over a car hood with his hand cupped over his mouth as if he were hold- sing a bamboo raed. He is imitating the bull moose sound Meat was making when discovered in the water. CAMERA PULLS BACK to see a large crowd gathered around Mickey and the others, including Meat.

“Mickey imitates the bellow once more. The crowd roar

: MEAT . a you can blow on,

Jarvis Indicates you know what Mickey begins trimpeting all the harder, Meat comes after him in mock ragej Mickey retreats, continuing to bellow. Meat stops short as a cop car pulls into the parking tot. The car stops and Ted Jarvis. steps out.

Dp pants and shirt which are outrageously large on him. He looks like Sleepy of "Snow White and the Seven Dwar Everybody is pissing themselves with laughter.

Laughter, Ted begins to leave.

oe WY WV

3-4

. of great violence.

-Tim’s father sneers and laughs. | lock which indicates he'll go through 4%

See you another time, boys. go fight the niggers. ;

It is of note that this outrageous rema

23c

Seinen mee

kids I'll

to the assem}

Gotta

irk doesn't ra gsters. Bil

eyebrow among any of the assembled your Tommy -- and certainly Brian if he werd say such a thing, but there's too much them to object to it,.

as Ted and his Partner are getting ante their car,

NAUGH'S FATHER comes SCREECHING into t motorcycle, a can of beer in his hand, much older than Tim, on the back seat shockingly young, a ‘brutish, truly dang He is taciturn and fear in almost anyone he meets. Tim's halt, he makes eye contact with Ted Ja, Jarvis knows and detests this man.

TED

Get rid of the beer, Cavanaug

Tim's father is momentarily taken aback.

with intense sarcasm,

Ted would Love to lock up Tim's. father he knows he doesn't have anything here He gets into his cruiser.

Ted's arrest if Ted wants him to.’ But Ted id

to get trapped into what really would 4 arrest. He nods no, and the two cops q

Now Tim's father scans the parking lot Finally, he spots him.

\

here -- wou peer pressuri

le parking lo and a young Tim's fathey erous man, ¢ surly but he father pulls vis. [t-is

h. Then he g

id near Ted's

for a any reas

wort

bbvious

Fins,

on, but e trpuble.,

B3D

pled

aise an

ly and

id never b for

TIM CAV

5 on his

Birl, not rF is hpabla

i ff be PY

instills to a |

feet.

le a "chicker}-

in search of

v

Partner gives Ted a he trouble of the too self- possessed

Icive off. oe i

shit’

Tim.

VY

o 34 continues: SY A’ SLB - oe oo CAVANAUGH (deliberately embarras ing the bay)

‘Tim! +- Get your ass over herp

Wi

a!

The SOUND of hig father's VOICE causes ' become sullen. {His friends’ faces refl pain on his behalf. With his tail betw shuffles over tq his father: Throughou

fim to instantly ect their shared een his legs, Tim the scene which

follows, Tim's Hather speaks loudly enough so that a portion

of what he's saying can be heard by Tin can all be heard by the girl, who nevex po Her presence alone both infuriates and

I heay you ran tail-ass from nigger tonight.

He cuffs him.

- | TIM It was} a joke.

's classmates. It utters a word herself. further embarrasses Tim.

_ 36

some

CN

TOMMY

Who is that guy? ;

| | BILLY

That’s Tim's old man. TOMMY

uncle...

Doesn't look old enough to be his

bi | [ quT TO:

Ve

B35 | | — 35e

ay

S

MED. SHOT - TIM AND FATHER

Tim walks silently, in profaund humiliation, over to his cur. He gets in without a word and drives off. Tim's Father is ‘Steeped in cold implacable fury. No one utters a word until he gets on his bike and ROARS off.

CAMERA EMPHASIZES the five of our principals still remaining.

: BILLY They should have left him in prison the last time.

. MICKEY Manslaughter. Killed a guy in a fight, tore his ear off with his bare hands.

There is an embarrassed and uncomfortable silence. The Silence is broken by Pee Wee who has returned from changing

into his own clothes. Bb A

| BILLY What d'ya look so glum about, Pee Wee?

PEE WEE

Rey, listen, man, this is getting ’" serious. I gotta get laid. Ij go more than a couple of weeks anf I Start to get jittery.

_ PEE WEE Funny , Jarvis}

vo

~y

‘Porky's!

Everyone stares f Mickey.

.I'm ready! I'm ready!

“Right. You guys don't know how ¢

36h

TOMMY

Nah, Pee Wee's tired of ham hocks

, MEAT Maybe there's a horny midget out there gomewhere, just eating her heart gut waiting for Pee Wee.

No, what we need here is some professional help.

MICKEY

PEE WEE

MICKEY

MICKEY ——

fe)

talk redneck. Porky's a businessman.

Listen... he's imported a whole }

of Cuban broads. They're fantast TOMMY How do you know all this? MICKEY I got my sources. Porky's got a upstairs called ‘Porky's Pen.’ ¥

oad ic.

room ou

can have a party up there with the Cuban dancers if you let ‘em know you

know what you're doing.

CONTINUED: (2)

6c

CAMERA IN

They nod assent.

Everyone turns to look at Pee Wee.

, MICKEY Does a bear shit in the woods)? PEE WEE Let's go now! . BILLY We got a game tomorrow. . MICKEY We need about thirty bucks ap , PEE WEE Thirty bucks? "MICKEY

Yeah, But anything goes. We Friday night, after the game .

BILLY

It's seventy miles. And we got a game Saturday night.

MICKEY * What'd ya say, Turner? Meat

TOMMY

You know my motto: Give me pussy

or give me death!

, 36D

Lece,.

can go

Tim?

37 + ft

TIGHT on a pair jof hands unwrapping a package.

V

‘smiles sweetly. |

CAMERA PULLS BACK to see Tonmy Tommy pulls out what looks to

WENDY

Beautiful. Beautifu

MICKEY

What the hell is that

38,

bu know, one of

, Billy, Mickey, and Wendy. be a giant balloon.

Ly

-?

7 huge prophylactic.

h gallon

-e, Give it

Suddenly they realize. It is |

She takes the rubber and puts j Pee Wee Looks

she walks past.

PEE WER

What"s she want?

as TOMMY Gee, I don't know, Pd

PEE WER

Ummph. Hey, man, I f _Breat new way to get

Tim and Meat approach.

lt behind her back. She at her suspiciously as

norman

e Wee,

igured out a your rocks off.

. MICKEY Another Pee Wee specilal. PEE WEE No, really, this is eat. Drive

-you nuts. You catch. three flies

wm.

This is what you do,

in a jar.

a7

This breaks everybody up.

CONTINUED: (2) oT)

er reer

ao.

nd t .

then you take some hongy and you get

in the bathtub and vouj fill the

tub

halfway and then you lje on yeur back

‘with the head of your ¢ock stick out the water.

There is a groan. Everybody knows what's

Then, you take the honey and you spread some over your gock and y let the flies out of tHe jar and they come to the honey Oh, man it's wild.

PEE , WES

ing

coming.

ou

t

Ne shit! Ail those tiny little fly feet caressing your dork -- oh man!

I wonder if I could get

a patent on this?

a flaw in this. How aré you gonna

- get three flies on the head of your cock?

At this moment Wendy has moved up behind P the giant rubber behind her back in an obv

Pee Wee whirls around. He is immediately easy when he sees Wendy. Everyone becomes seems as if the entire patio is watching.

around,

314 398

footer tet

pe Wee. She Has Lous way.

suspicious and un- quiet and it Pee Wee looks

vo V

Is

an

PEE WEE | What d'ya want? WENDY (coy) I got something for you. PEE WEE For me! What is it? WENDY It’s... uh.. kind of like PEE WEE A trophy? WENDY A trophy! For you. . PEE WEE A trophy? What for? WENDY.

For being the biggest di¢ ever went out with!

She holds up the giant rubber for 4 crowd howls as Wendy. presents the pushes it away choosing not to jol to walk away. And with that, Wendy swift move and jams the giant proph Wee's head. The results are more t imagined. The rubber wedges tightl like it had been form-fitted.

@ BTA

What are ya talking about?

40;

ay

a trophy...

khead I

verybody to see.|. The trophy’ to Pee Wee. He

the fun. Pee Wee starts steps forward with one ylactic right over Pee han she could h

ly over Pee Wee's head

It is extremely tight and Pee Wee's cally inside the thin membrane. T dangles absurdly dowm Pee Wee's ch five foot four inch penis. He gyr dislodge the device. The crowd RO

twists. his head, not without some consider throws it at Tommy . Tommy bends do

rubber and tosses at to Meat. TOMMY

Finally Pee Wee manages to} pull the rubbe

rest of the rubber Pee Wee locks like a a wildly, trying to

face is Ce comi- S. Pee Wee as and

over ble discomfort n and meee up

Here you go,Meat. Keep that for a spare.

Meat reacts by throwing the rubber disdainfully.

batk to Temmy ,

3B7E

you guys.

a (CONTINUED)

a ~!

CONTINUED: (4) 3 Ee WENDY

You should be so lucky, Shrimp.

We see Tommy approaching im the B.G. He has blown -_. * _up the giant condom and hoids the giant phallus against his crotch and nuégés ih ‘against Wendy and various ; girls in the crowd. They SQUEAL and run away laughing.. aq Fe Suddenly, a hush falls ovey the crowd. Mickey and the rt others try to warn Tommy bit he is oblivious. He whirls around looking for another /victim and runs smack into Miss Balbricker. To make mattets much worse, the wavering mock penis lodges itself right between Miss Baibricker's thighs. Tommy stands there dumbly er: a long moment with his surro-

gate penis protruding three feet cut from his crotch right into Miss Balbricker who does not budge. The crowd waits expectantly. Finally, Temmy loosens his grip and the rubber deflates slowly making thejcharacteristic raspberry SOUND, until it looks like a wounded nocdie hanging limply betwee Tommy's legs. Miss Balbri¢ker merely smiles. This is a long-awaited victory for her. She nuts out her hand and Tommy dejectedly hands over the evidence. Miss Balbricker marches off triumphantly. {Tommy looks after her. Mickey

steps up. MICKEY Your ass is mine| says Kong!

| TOPDY No shit,. Sherlock!

Tommy looks after the pachyclermic Miss Balbricker. He's in for it and he knows it. _—_— _ cur TO:

_. CAMERA EMPHASIZES Brian, who is being _gquarded by Tim,during an intra-squad game. Tim tries to guard Brian physically,

but Brian's moves are so slick and graceful that he leaves

Tom lunging at air and committing stupid fouls. After cne

such incident, Tim mutters "Kite bastard” unfer his breath. Tommy is the only one who hears him.

"mommy (7 7” i: ica ane Ang you thought Jews were just smart.

Tommy turns to see Goodenough with Balbrichke

ANOTHER ANGLE 2 oO

: 3d A Now the CAMERA EMPHASIZES Brackett and Warren.| Brackett Nods in the direction of the girls' side of the gym, and the CAMERA FOLLOWS his line of vision. We see|Miss Honeywell putting the Cheerleaders through their paces. Brackett and Miss Honeywell exchange coy smiles.

; RACKETT

We've gone out] twice. Zero, man. Zilch. The girl wants to be loved for her mind.

Then Warren lets out a qniet Little howl.

Man, you're driving me nuts with

this howling bit. What the hell

does it mean?

Warren points up toward the equipment rooms.

Guile, charm, persuasion, and if

that doesn't pe just ask her,

ANGLE HO.

Billy comes running up to join Tommy who is running Laps.

\V (CONTINUED) |

i.

vee 43. CONTINUEL: 2} 6 . Uo A.

Yommy holas up tio fingers.

. Sf TOMMY . T¥o games and 2,040 laps.

CAMERA SEES Miss |Balbricker looming up as we turn toward her. She looks dt Tommy, a triumphant smirk on her face.

Tommy glares at Her as he and Billy run past.

CAMERA PANS OFF them TO the stilj-smirking Balbricker.

arama —

CAMERA pulls back from a sign pointing toward Porky's. We see Mickey's truck coming in the distance. We hear. all boys singing a parody of “Dixie” ("I wish I was in. the land of Pussy...",etc.). The truck turns down

the dirt road,

4]A EXT: ROAD TO SHERIFF'S - WIGHT

Pee Wee stands in the back of the truck pulling on his Port Auburndale High School letter sweater.

; . TOMMY

‘ High school jocks don't even get inside this place. You're supposed ‘to be’ twenty-one. - et a

PEE WEE

Nobody said I was still a high school jock.

. PEE WEE Yeah...yeah, alright.

As. Pee Wee removes his sweater, Tommy turns to Meat in” disbelief. . , TOMMY A letter sweater! ;

see

ALA CONTINUED:

eeprom 7

In the background, we see a sign which says, \ SHERIFF WALLACETOWN, FLORIDA. Then we see the

— their makeshift office. MEAT

What the hell is this?

. TOMMY Sheriff's office!

They pull off around a corner past another Porky's sign.

\ _ MICKEY (continued) $ / . Abandon all. hope, all ye who enter here.

.41B EXT: JUST OUTSIDE PORKY'S - NIGHT CAMERA ESTABLISHES the neon sign atop Porky's, then PANS DOWN TO ESTABLISH the entire building. It is essentially the same as we saw it in Pee Wee'sdream. * ef eine een It's a wood shingle building built out over a pier. SRE eee The foundation of the building encompasses the entire pier except for about ten to fifteen feet in front of the building. This portion of the pier is narrower than the rest, and serves as a walkway between Porky’s and its dirt or gravel parking lot.

The CAMERA CONTINUES TO PAN, and we see that there's

a small canal. separating the Porky's complex from the main road. Across the canal are two small bridges, one for entering and one for leaving the parking lot.

Now, STILL IN ONE SHOT, we see Mickey's truck arriving” ‘with Mickey, Tommy, Tim, Meat and Pee Wee. They.

pile out of the truck. : UL} Cu

Everyone either responds that they do or /takes out their ID--and holds it up... except Pee Wee.

4l1B

44a,

UTS

Nt 41C CONTINUED: (2)

' There's general chuckling. Meat gives Pee Wee his ID, then looks through his wallet for other cards. Tommy looks, too.

\/ And Mickey leads the five of them to the front door,

Just inside the door, there's a BOUNCER] checking ID's. The boys’ mood and the MUSIC should give the moment of ‘the ID check an aspect of high~-tension.| |

BOUNCER

Okay. Let's see it!

.. which is comically undercut when tHe Bouncer glances at the ID's but doesn't even approx imaty inspecting them.

V

43,

ini

CONTINUED :

Pee Wee can't leave well enough alone.

PEE WEE

Yeah, it's been a couple of vears

since I been in the old joint.

—TY

As Tommy and Mickey glance skyward, th Pee Wee for the first time. The notio: twenty-one.is patently absurd. However, couldn't give less of a damn. He shakes

ttt

Bouncer looks at

that Pee Wee is the Bouncer his head at the

foolishness of Pee Wee's bravado, but waves him on in

just the same.

. BOUNCER Yeah, a fuckin' regular. Just stop talking and start drinkin

Pee Wee still won't Let it alone.

But this time, Meat drags him away from Pee Wee manages to get them all Fossecye

The room is divided into four areas. To enters is a horseshoe bar, and behind th on which three strippers are presently bk ing, picking out various men seated at t ing a particular piece of business for 4 who are interested. The strippers wear strings, but they'll remove them for the

tip.

Pee Wee takes one look at the stripper < leaps out of his shoes with excitement.

PEE WEE

Holy shit, it's a pussy stampede.

g.

the door before ut.

the right 4s one e bar is a funway umping and grind- he’ bar and design-. hose among the men | pasties andjG- right kind] of

rea and almgst

V

Oe

- Wee's hand, and plucks up the mong she gives Pee Wee a brief look at

CONTINUED :

. MICKEY Pudendum. It’s pudendum the correct word for wha vulgarians call pussy.

that in public.

' ANGLE

What 4 I'd never

U3SA

. That's ,

tC you 3 ' Pudendum,

say

47,

ug 8

Meat leads Pee Wee to the bar and sits down beside} hin.

Tommy leans over and whispers into

TOMMY

Look, but don't touch. Lf ud

CAMERA EMPHASIZES Pee Wee and Meat

figuring she has a live one, begins coming on Meat has all he can do to keep Pee/Wee from

and down. Pee Wee signals the str see her breasts. She holds up two PEE WEE Yeah, hell, yes, let's s MEAT -

It means it'll cost you to see them, stupid.

Pee Wee takes two dollars out of f toward the stripper. She extends

Pee Wee's body goes into a sort of

almost incoherently to Meat.

Ped Wee's

One of t

Lipper that fingers.

two bucks

UY

just havin

y with her

spasm. He

hot.

qua |

ee ‘em both.

is pocket pnd reache her foot tpward Pee

her breasts.

ear,

he strippers, to Pee Wee.

jumping up

he wants to

Udc+ 4S

Us

toes. Now

blabbers

deep-cleavage dresses and have begun to mingle with the

Lie HS 48.

_ CAMERA EMPHASIZES MICKEY, TOMMY AND TIM © f

The BARTENDER brings them their eight-cunce glass of beer.

Tommy produces a dollar.

A buck apiece

The boys exchange glances. If there were any Houbt what sort of place this was, it's certainly been dilspelled. Glumly, they pay for their dollar eight -ounce beers. We 8

hear a COMMOTION 0.S. USA LL S j cuy TO: —lL oe ue 6 Use

Two of Porky's henchmen are administering a beating to'a

‘very drunk patron. Pee Wee is pinned against the bar by

the drunk's dead weight. The two redneck thugs are pum-

meling the drunk without mercy. One of them wears a

wicked set of brass knuckles. Each blow squashes the YoGA. A. hapless Pee Wee against the bar. Finally, they drag the [| semi-conscious man out of the bar. Mickey, Tommy and Tim come to help Pee Wee, who is bruised but not hurt.

TIM _ What was that? ;

Now, with amazing speed, the strippers have donned clingy, men at the bar. Mickey addresses Pee Wee. . MICKEY

This is your night. Pick the one you want.

V

CONTINUED : | OA

Pee Wee practically lunges for the strippez with whom

he'd been flirting. Meat restrains. him.

‘MICKEY (continuing) Alright, I'll get her for you.

Mickey addresses the Bartender.

The Bartender replies with a mingling of

disdain.

oe

ostility and

The Bartender starts to resist further, then smiles. It should be evident that he's got grief in mind for Mickey

and his friends.

And he disappears into the rear of the nightclub. Mickey turns to the other guys, smugly pleased with his handling

of this encounter. MICKEY

Ss.

You've got to show them who's bo I'll take care of everything -+ wait here and do nothing. Donjt any drinks. Their racket is t¢ you to buy the broads overpriced drinks.

just ' buy get

_| (CONTINUED)

Se ee ee ed ee

(2) HT

The five boys turn around -- and there's PORKY. Porky is

tall and immense, like a defensive lineman

team, than he actually is, and his snout-like fac

that's why they call him "Porky."

on a football However, his stubby legs make him appear fatter

bp... well,

assurance) Well, Porky, my friends and I wou like to party with five of your girls up in ‘Porky's Den.'

1d

e

pen, eh? For how long? MICKEY An hour. PORKY Whatta ya got to spend? MICKEY (proudly)

A hundred bucks.

Porky does a momentary take. That price ig

so ridiculous

he should just throw these amateurs out. But he catches

himself, preferring to have some fun by sty boys along.

inging the

47 CONTINUED :

Porky stops, allowing Mickey to catch up with him. un 2)

. PORKY —— (growling) © Yeah,..?

. MICKEY : How many girls can we have for a hundred dollars?

«©

. MICKEY (iispizited) That' s all.

The other guys have gathered around. They fmurmur their

assent. . PORKY Okay, pick out the ones you want... MICKEY (pointing) Her, her... and her. vee HTS 47] One of them is Pee Wee's choice. ~~ | — PORKY Cash in advance. 2 _ Mickey looks to the others for counsel. a : | 7 | (CONTINUED)

oN 47

wy

CONTINUED :

Okay.

The boys look at one another _abashed made so easily.

He laughs at a joke he's just made, stand it yet.

Pee Wee makes a pleasure sound and

(2) | Lf

TIM |

I wouldn't, Mick...

‘PORKY Only. way I do business.

MICKEY

Mickey starts to hand Porky the money.

land

TD 47 8

you

y giris sses

all the way back to Port A

uburndale.

See that door over there? step through it and wait. be dark in there, but don surprised,

MICKEY

What's all this bullshit About?

pack of underage kids, a want my liquor license re

This bullshit is Kids, ane T do a id

Sheriff around here's a Had-ass

mother.

So I don't want no one seeing you That's a

You just wait till you hear a kno¢k, then

you go through another door and’

The girls’ll]be waitin’...

with none of my girls. back way up to the pen.

you're in.

ft be

hops up and da ~ (CONTINUED)

that they hav

Well, It ‘11

I don't — oked.

but we don't tnder-

e been

47 E

Vv

V

2 47 CONTINUED: (3) HID ung ume — | “Porky notices. .

. PORKY _ (continuiny)

You like that, kid? Good. I'L give you a night to remember.

ah

And Porky walks across to the bar where the strippers are plying their trade. Mickey sees him tary to the strippers and point toward him and his buddies. Salttisfied that ail is set, Mickey leads Tommy, Pee Wee, Meat| and Tim over to the door Porky had indicated. They open fit and step into a pitch-black room. Porky breaks out in a big grin Everyone in the immediate area is laughing.

Mickey closes the door behind them, and the five boys find themselves standing in total darkness.

_xeally hot. . They're paid to be hot, Casanova.

| TOMMY I can't feel any door.

Now the door they've just come through is locked.

Yeah, right! Ready, Porky! _ (CONTINUED)

vy

Jo.

CONTINUED :

PORKY (0.S.) US &

Okay, boys, here's your night to remember.

And a trap door opens, dropping the boys about ffive feet down into about two feet of Everglades water, fe and muck,

+50 ee. UNDERNEATH PORKY'S PIER - NIGHT

At first, we hear nothing but a string of epithets as the angry and humiliated boys clamber out of the water under- neath the pier and up into the parking lot. We can hear raucous LAUGHTER coming from above.

Now everybody is on Mickey's ‘ass.

Mickey is humiliated, and consequently berserk with rage at the man who’s humiliated him, who's caused him to lose face in front of his friends. But he projects a Herculean

calm.

o™,

ee

ane

CONTINUED :

TIM

It's. too late, man. , J

And before anyone realizes what's happening ~- or can stop him -- Mickey's gone back inside Porky's.

Mickey storms right past Bouncer #1. The man stares at him with surprise and amazement.

Mickey walks into the main room; stops in his tracks and makes his challenge.

of pig shit out here!

There's a stunned hush throughout the nightclub. All motion stops, except for Bouncer #2 who goes to get Porky. Bouncer boys are blocked from getting to Enel buddy and getting

him the hell out of there,

Now Porky emerges through the crowd, walking up to HMeKkey with a vicious smirk on his face.

. PORKY How was the pussy, boys?

A murmer of shock passes through the club. Nobody talks to Porky that way. But Porky low-keys it for the moment.

PORKY

Sure, son, (MORE)

CONTINUED :

é

And Porky leads the way out to the parking lot.

There's Porky and his two Bouncers, the Bartender, some other employees of Porky's we haven't seen before, Mickey, the four other boys and a few curious guests from inside. Tommy and Meat are trying to cool off the whole thing.

forget the whole thing.

‘

Tommy takes Mickey by the arm and starts to lead him away. But Mickey is too proud. He wrestles free and makes a rush at Porky. Mickey takes a roundhouse swing, which Porky biocks with one great meaty arm. Now Porky shoves Mickey toward Bouncer #1, who proceeds to slap Mickey around. It's not a beating, more of a grazing. Mickey gets a bloody nose and a swollen lip, but there's no serious injury... save to his already-damaged pride.

ANGLE Out p

Mitkey Kneeis in the dust of the parking lot. Just as Tim and the others are about to enter the fray, no matter how reluctantly, two police cars careen over the "in" bridge and SCREECH{ to a hait. The SHERIFF and three deputies get out. The Sheriff is a huge hulk of a man, not unlike Porky in stature.{ He immediately seeks to take control.

Tommy tries{to go to Mickey's aid, but thq Sheriff stops him with a word.

jo a CONTEND

CONTINUED: _—

Now the Sheriff walks over to Porky.

What happened here, Pork?

PORKY

Some Port Auburndale boys came in

looking for trouble.

PEE WEE

‘Yeah, we were just lookjn for...

| SHERIFF

Shut the fuck up! Looks to me like we got some Port Auburndale assholes here. Yes six, five walking, talking

rectums.

The Sheriff walks over to Mickey, his feet,

Mickey points to his car. The Sh

it. He inspects it a moment.

MICKEY

ih Seward ty dlights.

Suc

cee

Su B

Lifting him roughly to

br iff drags himjover to -

S++ D

ring)

aws about

I don't have a busted headlight.

The Sheriff uses his nightstick to smash Mickey's right

headlight.

Vv Vv

CONTINUED: (2)

- Funny, I could hav a busted headlight thirty dollar fine bucks: or a night i

Mickey would gear ly love tot

presents the law. such as MICK! I've only got nine The others dig into their po TOM]

I've got ai SUE. MEAT I' ve got six to ma

The Sheriff responds by smas

TIM

I've only got a buck fifty. . PEE WEE

I've got five.

The Sheriff takes it all.

64D

sworn you had

That's a boy -- thirty jail.

etaliate, but thlis man re- t is.

rkets.

a

Ke thirty. hing Mickey's taillight.

P

show leniency for (to Porky) |

He fishes} in his pock

Whatta ya think, Pork -- shall I give these nice lads a break?

Porky laughs and starts back inside.

PORRY = em a break. They're

Yeah, give ' ort Auburndale

nice, clean-cut, pussies.

Lov

V

a

UB sya SsuD”

CONTINUED: (3) The Sheriff turns to the boys.

Mickey is spoiling for more} but Tommy anf Meat drag him into the car. Tim and Pee Wee pile in after, and they — drive off. 1

eee ead ced Reemtandrromatine

CAMERA PANS to where Mickey is seated, surrounded by Tommy, Pee Wee, Tim and Meat. They've been relating their story to Billy, his girlfriend GINNY, and a half-dozen familiar

faces, TOMMY Hell, it's something you write off. They're bad mothers, I'll tell you that. ,

Suddenly. Mickey leaps to his feet, pounding his fist into his palm. There's a look of grim determination on his face.

And Mickey begins striding toward his car, as the other guys grab him, try to head him off, block his way, etc. But Mickey's a man possessed. It appears the only way to stop Mickey would be for the guys to tackle him -- or for Meat to deck hin.

H } a i

aeemeaneenanad

CONTINUED: SS

Fortunately, pust as Mickey|reaches his car, Ted pulls up in the police; cruiser. He jumps out, grabbing Mickey by the arm. Mickey suddenly becomes calmer, allowing Ted to look into his| eyes, check him out. It's clear Ted has a sway over Mickey none of hig peers possess.

ried to butt theads

MICKEY | SSC

I'djve whipped hisl|ass if it wasn't for ithe sheriff.

' MEAT That) scumbag sheriff sided with Porky. ~ TIM . Busted Mickey's headlight. PEE WEE “Taillight too. TED That} ‘scumbag sheriff' is Porks's brother. | There are several simultaneous exhalations of air. ASSORTED VOICES Jeezis! Son-of-a-bitch! I don't believe it. No shit. ; TED (to Mickey) Now just where were jyou headed? MICKEY Backito Porky's. TED Listen, Junior’, after you go out ther¢ and he beats your ass agajin, \V/ then {what 're ya gonna do? = V (CONTINUED)

are

S5A

5 CONTINUED : (4)

Go b

This arou tire

M ack, and ke

T

d now but H of you, ¢

guy's dangilerous.

[ICKEY ep goin'

ED

he's goi hen he's

you

Mickey says norhing.

Am I myself?

Alright

Mickey heads for his pickup.

bad.

Ted TED

(continuing) gonna have

(beat)

watches

to take

MICKEY

po de aé home ,

Smead

Goddanned redneck.

Ted

558 SED S5C ssB.

back.

He's playin ng to get gonna hurt

him a long’

you home

ponienel

u)

L00ks afte}

Billy and the others come up to Ted.

_ TOMMY Do you think he's really going back?

TED

Runs jn the family, I'm afraid. Hope he lives to grow out of it.

CAMERA MOVES IN

Sb

i nae - pay SoA ‘Coach Brackett stands in

Tommy is by the b

well seduding, Wendy.

either couple but Miss to Miss Honeywell,

The girls are

Balbricker can stan

on them. They look after Mickey.

beat.

him.

nad

SOB

ignorjfing Brackett.

MISS BALBRICKER

She marca

a doorway talking with Miss Honey- eachers talking, or ratHer,

Miss Balbricker can be seen in ground, pacing, obviousl

the back-

y agitated to be in the presence of sg much fecundity. We do not hear what is sai the impact is clearly sexual. H it no longer.

d between Finally, hes 3)

J

waiting, Miss HomeyarelhN

r™

{PF <

CONTINUED :

Miss Honeywell smiles not afraid of this ogre. mock kiss and, smiling bricker ‘is not happy.

up behind Brackett.

She gives Brackett t Balbricker, she hep

. OACH WARREN _ How's Lassie?

Brackett looks exasperated.

Sek See

owingly at Balbricker.

She is a cute litt ds off. Ba

the locker He walks

le 1~

he storms off. Coach Warren comes

off OUT OF CAMERA. Brackett stares after Warren and finally does a sarcastic Little how! of his own in Warren's direction.

INTERCUT ST]

' —T It's near the pnd of practice. Once again, t five are playihg against the first five off t

che starting

he bench.

Tim

is guarding Brian Schwartz, and Brian is once more getting

around him, out-faking him, scoring on him.

Finally, in

frustration, “Timtrips Brian as he cuts past him to drive

-to the basket. It's an obvious, flagrant and dangerous

foul, and Brian goes flying out of bounds, falling into. the wall behind the basket. The only thing which stops him from being seriously hurt is the presence of a large square of foam rubber padding which is attached to the wall behind

the backboard for just such situations.

Now we're INTERCUTTING between two situations.

nough has seen what Tim has done. He whistles the practice

STA

ey

Coach Goode-

to a halt and begins to chew out Tim. At the same time. Billy, Tommy and Coaches Brackett and Warren have gone to

attend to Brian.

furious) '

Alright, time out! Cavanaugh, get off the floor. ,

Tim is in a confused state. He's still inj a rage at Brian for making him look bad, but he's also acultelvy embarrassed

at having been caught taking such a cheap {sho

N

t.

59 |

en \~—

CONTINUED : c 5¥

z Tim lowers his head and trudges toward the sidelines.

You're benched indefinitely, Cavanaugh. No one who plays that way plays for me...

CAMERA EMPHASIZES Billy, Tommy and the assistant coaches helping Brian to his feet. He's shaken up, and he has a mildly twisted ankle, but essentialily he's okay. Now, as Brian walks back onto the court..

_ CUT TO:

We see a basketball sneaker come hurtling into a locker. CAMERA PULLS BACK to see Tim, who angrily throws his other shoe after the first. Behind Tim, in the background, we see Brian and the others file in. Tim has obviously been waiting for this moment. He walks over to the guys and addresses them with false camaraderie.

- TIM Hey, any of you guys want to go out and fly a kite with me tonight. I think it's great weather for kites. I wonder if there's any kites around. here we could fly.

Brian decides he has had enough. He walks directly over to Tim.

Tim lunges at Brian, but Billy and Tommy grab him and hold him BES:

C) Em

’ CONTINUED : BRIAU (calmly) If you want. q

64,

60¢

We're already into the fight. We see Tim throw a rpundhouse right. Brian ducks it easily, — tattogs Tim with(a flurry of stinging jabs. Tim continues to swing wildly, and Brian continues to give him a boxing lesson, establishing} total superiority. Finally, in frustyation, Tim rushes at Brian and with his hands open, as if to grab dnd choke him. Brian deftly handles this maneuver by grabbing Tim's handland -- using a basic karate move -~ tossing him into the air and

onto his ass. GOD

This scene includes numerous

ACTION SHOTS of Tim and

Brian's teammates. None of these boys know very much about

Brian but they're coming to a to handle Tim, and for doing i seriously injure him.

tire him, both for being able in such @ way as not to

GOE

After a moment on the ground, Tim staggers up| to make

another charge at Brian, but we see him sudde expectedly grabbed from behind by two street- arms which place him in a hammerlock. CAMERA

it's Coach Brackett.

- COACH BRACKETT Alright, Tim -- that’s enough. Knock it off. Enough.

Brian comes over to Tim and extends his hand the gesture, turns and walks away.

hly and un- rlothes-clad reveals that

Tim ignores

6 | | 65. a ee . .

Billy, Tommy and Brian are walking toward their respective cars. Instead of walking off by himself, Brian has allowed: Billy and Tommy to draw him into conversation. BILLY How'd you learn to fight like that?

Ae

| TOMMY ~ _ Were you sure you'd remember how?

ff ( NN

They all laugh. 61 A BILLY = but

—— Look... uh... Tim's our buddy, you gotta understand. He's got problems.

el& ——=

(CONTINUEY)

V V

oN 61 —_

Billy and

There is an understanding here,

BILLY

It's easy for Tim to take his problems out on you. You know, Tim thinks you'r He's not a bad guy.

(after a pause): He's a prick.

Tommy look after Brian.

BILLY

Schmuck. He's a schmuck. That | Jewish for prick, right?

BILLY

6) bic.

e€

I

a

Yeah, see ya.

They watch Brian go.

putting him down.

61D

s

_ We see Pee Wee, Tommy and an obviously very drunk Meat

standing beside a pay phone at the back of a very crowded s. At the far end of the restaurant where the

counter is sit Billy, Brian, Ginny and Wendy. | (CONTINUED)

Deadhead'

CC}

CONTINUED :

Pee Wee starts to dial the pay phone. He is elated,

When Pee Wee finishes dialing, they look

begins to RING. The WAITRESS who appears calls down to Wendy.

As Wendy gets up to answer the phone, the

what she is doing to watch. Obviously she is in on the gag. Wendy picks up the phone. — 624

Pee Wee speaks in a disguised voice.

| _ WENDY Yeah, well, what's his name?

Pee Wee pronounces “Mike Hunt” very caref two names do not run together. Wendy doe a rather obscene interpretation can be ma

is pronounced rapidly.

She's put the phone down and starts walki yelling loudly.

Several people in the crowded restaurant

et

toward the far

- end of the restaurant as the PHONE beside the cash register

to be very busy

that

Waitress stops

o2e

He's : 11 ask

ully so that the sn't catch on that de when Mike Hunt

ng down the counter

i

begin to giggle

immediately. It's an old gag but Wendy has been completely taken in. VY

- COPS walk in the doo and particularly at eat who is now seated and trying ~ clumsily to eat the bowl of chili which is in front of h . Brian leans over to Billy.

CONTINUED: (2)

' 628 52 A 8.

E2D

Meat stumbles up to where Billy, Ginny 'and Brian are at the

end of the counter. out loudly and very prunkenly.

MEAT

Jesus Christ, Wendy, if you don't

know, I don't know who does..

They are all br eaking up.

Meat yells

The entire restaurant breaks up. Wendy| still doesn't get

it. She ignores Mear.

. : WENDY — . Has anybody seen Mike Hunt!

MEAT

Practically everybody in town|from

what I hear.

Then it hits her. into applause.

pay phone. yells out. 62£ WENDY L'd] get you, Poe Wee. PEE WEE

You should| be so Lucky...

Wendy takes it in good humor.

She walks phone down.

WENDY |

6LE

ee eel

Her face turns crimson. Theicrowd breaks Wendy turns to see Pee Wee and Tomay on the Pee Wee is beside himself with glee! Wend

s \

—lL—

back to put the

Not bad! Wot bad, Pee Wee... you

little prick... literally.

She sits down amid the laughter. They look at the

The Cops are definitely looking. ean

625 | BRIAN

What's got into Meat? I didn't

think he drank?

and I mean that

Just at this amet tw

626 2H

applauding crow

(CONTINUFD)

The two Cops arrive and look down at Meat.

62H

CONTINUED: (3) , ———

ate

At this moment, Meat yells loudly.

Meaning, of course, "This chili tastes like 5 with that, Meat's head hits the counter with The Cops look up. They stand and start over

direction.

Pee Wee runs INTO FRAME carrying the sugar.

Ss coal

Tommy picks up on it immediately and joins in.

the sugar from Pee Wee, speaking with elabora

_ TOMMY Thank you, Edward, for bringing Anthony some sugar. (turning to Billy) How many cubes of sugar does your cousin require when he's had too much insulin?

(Cc

(E2K

hit,'| and a lo thud. in Meat 's

é2L

He takes te formality. (

sew NN Fa

ONTINUED) |

o>

E21

CONTINUED: (4)

ene taneeemennel

\

| BILLY Two cubes of (sugar usually brings Anthony around.

Billy takes two cubes gf’sugar from Pee Wee and

them into Meat’s mouth] Meat drunkenly spits tHe cubes into the air and ithey land in a jbowl of squp being little bit

eaten by a burly truck idriver ten feet] away. A

20 2k Gan.

7%,

inserts sugar

‘of chili bean lands right on the first) officer's nose.

Tommy lets ge of Meat's head to go ang appease 4 And Meat's

driver who is about to waise hell. forward smack into his {bowl of chili. | Everyone

looks

he truck ead pitches

at

Meat. No one moves for a long moment.{ Finally ithe First

Cop calmly wipes the errant chili bean{ from his

mose.

These cops are very codl and not lacking in a sense of

- 3 FIRST COP Gee, I never isaw anybody drown in a bowl of chili before.

; SECOND COP Me neither. #£ wouldn't even know how to fill out the forms on that.

save him. = - ‘ SECOND COP Yeah, we better. ‘He reaches over and lifts Meat's head from the c is a mess. . | SECOND COP (continuing)

Gee, I'm not A doctor, but I could swear this young ster is inebriated,

| FIRST COP Well now, if you all say he's a diabetic and we find out he's drunk, we'd have to book the whole lot of you as, accessories!

humor. The Cop tilts his head and looks down at) Meat _is snorting in the chiki, out cold.

mili.

(CON

| Va ‘

INUED)

who

Meat

CONTINUED: (5) ; BILLY, TOMMY & PEE WEE He's drunk! Definitely! Pee Wee, as always, overplays it. ' . é PEE WEE , Son of a bitch does it all the time! Everybody looks at Pee Wee/in disbelief. Pee Wee shrugs. Brian speaks up.

Officer, I couldn't help but notice

what's been happening here.

BRIAN

Just a bystander. Brian Schwartz's

the name.

“~ 62N

Vw

62 P

He extends his hand, and before they realize;it, both Cops have shaken it and are listening to him as i he actually

were some impartial voice of reason.

.woman you loved turned her back

The two Cops laugh. The boys, on cue from Bz the laughter.

to Meat) Now I overheard this poor fellow saying he'd gotten drunk because his girlfriend had broken up with him tonight. Tell me, gentlemen, wouldn't you be likely to toss down a few if, God forbid, the

on you?

rian, join in

ton

"72.

Oy NO UU.

CONTINUED: (6)

The two Cops wave and walk away. Tommy, Billy and Bee Wee turn to Brian. . TOMMY You are a smooth mother, Schwartz! 62R 62 8 3 oye

Brian just grins self-consciously. The others are slapping him on the back, pounding his hand, and making gieneral gestures of camaraderie. However, noj sooner has the police cruiser driven off, than Steve Klingelhofer, one of the boys from the "Nympho in the Everglades" caper, comes running {over

The group rushes out. *

. t.

As Steve and all the boys except Meat run INTO FRAME, the CAMERA EMPHASIZES Mickey. He's sitting behind the wheel of his car, facing toward them, the car door open. Al- though there's blood all over his face, an eye swollen shut, perhaps a broken nose -- Mickey is grinning.

MICKEY 635A 635

_. (barely coherent) The son of a bitch broke his hand!

And so saying, Mickey collapses onto the gteering wheel unconscious.

Pee Wee nods and runs off. Billy turns tq Tommy.

VY VY

Cy 63

CA 68R®.

but I guess we’d better. (starti MEE) I'1l get my car}. Mickey sits up abruptly. MICKEY

I'm not going tp the hospital, man. What's the matter with you

guys? He starts up his engine.

. BELLY — Mickey, where ypu going?

learned my lesson.

Mickey grins crazily at t He peels out and is gone. | a: We're gonna hav

hem through } Billy starg

ils blood-soaked face. 2s after him.

with

him! =~

They look dejectedly after Mickey. ? —

We see Coach Brackett and Miss Honeywell huddled in a corner, talking in obviously warm and sensual tones. Brackett keeps looking up the stairs toward the equipment room and then back to Miss Honeywell. We can't hear what they say but it is obvious that Brackett has become des- perate enough to heed Warren's advice. But it is alsr clear that Miss Honeywell is being playful. So far sne demurs; coquettishly to be sure, but nonetheless it's no go. The tug of war continues until we see Miss Balbricker ENTER FRAME and confront the two. We CUT CLOSER:

—_

_—o:

4 CONTINUED:

64H

do you mind?

MISS BALBRICKER

You. know what [I'm talking about. It's disgusting, the two of you

squirming abo: eels in heat.

We get a very surprising Honeywell. no "merde” from anybody. force of her reaction.

hippopotamus,

We could swear that Miss as she draws herself up

What did you ¢

Beulah! -Beula

She's got quiite a temper and obvid

‘MISS HONEYWELL Yeah, well it beats stompin’ and. waddling around like a frigid Beulah.

HISS BALBRICKER

like a pair of

You're a disgrace. / ol Q G4e C4D

reaction from the petite Mis lusly t

kes

Brackett is quite stunned Hv the

Balbricker's heel: fick together

nh a rage.

11 me?

ISS HONEYWELL —s_ Ballbreaker !

Balbricker is apopleptic

Who do you think you're talking to?

Well...

the fat lady at it is, I guess of bad news nam Beulah.

Miss Honeywell shoves het and says, ''Beulah" as if

effect is shocking, coming from this seemingly demure

woman. Brackett tries |

Uh... Lymn...

fo (CONTINUED) Yo

if there was a hurdy gurdy playing, I‘d say I was talking to

Brackett's jaw hangs to th

ISS BALBRICKER

ISS HONEYWELL

But as to a ton Beulah,

the circus. I'm talking ed Beulah,

face right up to Miss Balbricker's

she were a braying donkey.

intercede,

Tae

V.

e floor.

little

Y

4. CONTINUED: (2)

Butt out!

ay

Moral turpitude!

What?

Moral turpitude! contract.

Take your

' shines, Beblah.

storms off. furious. -and then back to Balbricker.

pulls Brackett o

Ce eeemeniiaied

Brian and Meat as they are g and track practice.

They all look up to see Tim about thirty feet away. Tin on one side.

. Balbricker draws herent up. MISS BALBRICKER

MISS HONEYWELL

MISS BALBRICKER

I'll have you fired for moral turpitude!

By now Balbricker is} foaming Miss Honeywell stares after her, She looks: pp the stairs, pogks back to Brackett,

grabs Brackett by the hand anf starts{up the sitairs. £ balance and nearlvjdrags him as we...

oa 65_ INT. LOCKER ROOM - DAY 65K

on

cua 6d bdd cas

MISS HHONEYWEUL

Read your

t the mouth. She turns and just as

is madeiup. She

Her ming She

CAMERA PICKS UP Pee Wee as he comes to join Tommy, Rilly,

etting dressed for basketball WEE ugh's face?

LY

who is clearing out his locker t's face is purplish and swollen

the kid over,

- Brian looks at Tim in disbelief.

/ (CONTINUED)

ESA 76.

ATT

CONTINUED :

¢

There is silence.

I'm really sorry... BULLY You didn't do it.

Brian looks at them.

His old man.

. BULLY

Because he got in a fight with a Jew -- and lost.

Brian is stunned.

‘AT a, It's not your an man. Brian looks at Tim. He is obviously disturbed. He gets up

and walks down toward Coach Goodenough's office. We cannot hear what is said but we pe an idea.

CAMERA PANS along a row of assorted athletic uniforms and equipment and rows of lockers where the boys keep their

‘socks, jocks, T-shirts and other gear. We hear Coach

Brackett and Miss Honeywell from 0.S. Obviously a secuction is in progress. CAMERA COMES to them. Miss Honeywell breaks the clinch.

ree CONTINUED : CAMERA FOLLOWS them as they move past the lockers, back

into the inner recess which is where the dirty laundry is ; piled as well as fresh socks/jocks, ete. for issue. The

‘floor and tables are littered with worn athletic equipment.

The room is close and somewhat ripe. Miss Honeywell stops | and draws in a lungful of air as if she were in the Alps.

this. The place

Over her shoulder we see Brackett react to ious that Miss

doesn't smell that great to him. It is o Honeywell is getting turned on. She grabsj up a handful of T-shirts, jocks and socks and buries her face in then.

Her eyes are lighting up. She turns around to face Brackett.

_ MISS HONEYWELL (continuing) Mnaummmmmn! Oh boy! Oh boy!

Brackett can't believe his eyes. The girl} is obviously aflame. He hardly has time to brace himself as she rushes at him and literally leaps on him, curling her legs around his waist and devouring his mouth with hezs. Her passion is uncontained. Brackert gathers his witg and begins to disrobe her, slipping her shorts and panties down in one smooth move. She struggles frantically ' help him with

his. They struggle, out of breath.

Oh, it turns me on. It turns mé¢

on. It always has. [I don't kndw

why.

They manage to slip his shorts down and Brackett tak.~ her standing up. Their frenzy is more comic than salacious. They stumble about comically trying to stay upright and still keep the proper motion. Miss Honeywell is getting carried away, her breathing is coming in great gulps. Brackett's face is buried in her neck. Hé pants.

| Aconranuen)

aa

ee)

— os es

————

. He slows down.

~~ T 78. CONTINUED: (2)

Lynn, Lynn!... I gotte know... (breath)

I gotta know... (breath)

Why... (breath)

Why do they call you.}. (breath)

. call you Lassie.

And on the word "know'' we and Brackett find owt exactly why Miss Honeywell is called Lassie} because in the grip of un- controllable passion, Miss Honeywell's "know''jturns into a piercing wail or rather howl, an exact duplication of an

old hound dog. It is soasibly te obvious that once started, Miss Honeywell cannot possibly stop. The howls come in steady waves, reverberating offithe equipment /room wall and echoing throughout the entire gym. These howls are long

and loud. Brackett's eyes fly open and his head flies back to look at her in shock. But he doesn't stopjpumping.

COACH BRACKETT

What the hell!

| MISS HONEYWELL | . Howl! Howl! Howl!

COACH BRACKETT © Holy shit!

Brackett tries to put his hand over her mouth to no avail.

i cL

The boys are having lay-up drills. As“ea guy drives in for his lay-up, we see the mighty effort being made to keep from laughing. Coach Goodenough is jprobably the only person in the gym who doesn't knew what'g going on.

wth

_£8_

—p

—

CONTINUED: eis | 678 | ;

He looks up and all around}

Coach. Warren is right at his elbow and the pain of restrain- ing his laughter is! evident on his fa¢e. Meanwhile, Miss ies of red. Her girls

Balbricker is turning about eight shac gives themja look that would

are stifling giggles. She , wilt lettuce. They clam up. The HOwnS ECHO through the

rafters. ty

a satin

Brackett doesn't know whether to shit or go blind, as the. He's in too deep to stop, forgive the

expression goes. pun. His own arousal makes the thought of stopping un- bearable, but on the other hand, Lynn's howls have reached

a crescendo.

Coach Warren has broken down. He can contain himself no longer. He walks to the canvas mat which is hung on the back wall behind the basket. He pulls the mat away from the wall and steps behind it and lets his laughter pour out. Coach Goodenough is thoroughly suspicious now. The

boys are breaking up openly, even as they continue the fast break drill. We CUT just as Miss Balbricker walks up

to Coach Goodenough.

Brackett is maneuvering Lynn toward the laundry baskets. ‘Lynn is totally gone now. Her head thrown back emitting howl after”"howl. Brackett makes a monumental effort to keep stroking and, at the same time, bend over and grab a handful of laundry. He succeeds and abruptly shoves a ‘handful of clean jocks and socks square into Miss Honey- well's mouth, cutting her off in mid-howl. She looks at him in surprise for a moment, then continues to emit her muffled cries. They resume their frantic lovemaking.

CAMERA FOLLOWS Coach Goodenough as he walks deliberately over to the canvas mat and pulls it out from the wall. There is Coach Wacren Like some exposed bug.

| 80. Cy 71 CONTINUED: I He stares at Coach/Goodenough, tears in his eyes, his body convulsed with laughter, but in truth, he could be crying. He hurries past Coach Goodenough, saying merely...

COACH WARREN

a

Gas!!]

He heads toward the john. We... — | | CUT TO:

i

Now trying to look as inconspicuous as possible, Coach

Brackett emerges from theidoor of the boys' locker room and walks across the gym to join his colleagues and his players.

t

A silence "erupts. Everyone's eyes are on Coach Brackett. There's stifled laughter.| If Coach Goodenough weren't present, cne should feel there might have been applause. REACTION SHOTS of all congerned. Miss Balbricker has a laser-like glare in her eye that would sear off Brackett's a ae scrotum.

Coach Brackett finally reaches the side of the solemn-as- stone Coach Goodenough. , | oF

Sorry I'm late, (Coach Gopdenough. Case of the runs|. Hurt Like hell, you probably heard me all the way out here.

Warren) Must be catching}

He turns his back on Brackett and plows his whistle.

_ 7 . a NY (CONTINUED)

to.

. CONTINUED:

(conti

Alright. st~

CAMERA PANS over to

her ears. .

.

albricker.

$2.6 —

meng

“Aa.

COACH GCODENOUGH

nuing)

break drill...

Steam is coming out of

Pee Wee hurries

The boys are coming in f to catch up with Tommy an

. FB Wait a minute. It'll drive you

yi Pee W

y No, really. Fi and two jelly d

What now,

The others walk away leavy

; 3 Forget it, Pee

q ‘I'm not taking

Religious fanat At this point we pick up

practice. He walks past Tommy. They look after }

i

om practice. dad Billy.

IEE WEE

onuts.

get a watermelon

fing Pee Wee standing there.

Mickey coming in from track Pee Wee and on to Billy and pim.

Hey, Mickey... why don't you

Mickey grins.

lower yourself

out there.

ome along?

re not going back You shouldn't to brawl with that

redneck riff raff.

{CONTINUED)

Cy set 7 2

SlA *

CONTINUED: LD @_

Meat steps up.

_ him ever. He'll think Porky's his mama when{|I finish with him.

. MICKEY I'd have to be some kind of idiot to messiwith those shitkickers.

ee PEE WEE ; They're going in. Let's go! :

The guys split! Camera moves in on Mickey. A strange little jigrin plays on his face. a

BEHIND. THE GIRLS' SHOWER ROOM - DAY

In silent Montage we see Billy, Pee Wee and Tommy pursue the same tortuous path to the girls' shower room as was pursued by Billy, Pec Wee and Mickey in the previous sequence.

As contrasted with the previous occasions, we can hear the SOUND OF MANY GIRLS TALKING, GIGGLING, milling about.

.

SHOWER ROOM FROM THE BOYS' POV - DAY (INTERCUT)

(whispering) I've never seen so much wool. You . could knit a sweater. .

a ) F400 CC FAR FAD ee.

~~. Indeed, peering into the shower from Tommy's /POV, there is - a veritable rainbowjof nubile young girls shqwering, chat- ting, and being playful, as young girls are wont to do.

PEE WEE ; _

Damn it!

" ‘ . CUT TO: 3S a<a 75 PEE WEE'S POV a ioe

And we see why he is perturbed. A yqung lady who is very broad in the beam is showering right jin front of Pee Wee's peephole. The expanse is efifectively blocking Pee Wee's view of the glory hole. We|see only {an Sera psones glimpse of a sweet young thing as tHe girl's massive} bottom obli-

terates the view.

Be quiet!

PEE|WEE As os |

They're starting tc leave!} Shit!

And indeed some of the girls are finishing their ghowers =) and leaving. Pee Wee scoots over and tries {to horn in on tb

Tammy's viewpoint.

oo TOMMY ‘Hey, beat it, Midget.

PEE} WEE (loudly) But I'm missing it.

here!

_ Pee Wee gives a plaintive Mittle cry and hurries Back to ne his own nook. He peers through, and there, looming like a colossus, is Blubber McNeil's omnipresent rear end. De- . licious visions are seen flleeting to the left and jright of the obstacle but they dq more to frustrate than to

gratify. . | —=

NY (CONTINUED):

CONTINUED : Pee Wee twists this way and that way, keening like an old

Greek woman in mourning. Finally, in total frustration and quite loudly he blurts out:

. PEE WEE God damn it! Will you move it, Lard Ass!

ay

Tommy and Billy snap their heads around like puppets and stare open-mouthed at Pee Wee. We.

BLUBBER McNEIL to | 46 A

who stands glued to the shower floor, her eyes wide, com- | pletely spooked by the disembodied, [but very male voice, which seems to come from the ether. | There are only about four GIRLS Left in the shqwer at thils point; they all stop and look at the wall. Finally, Blubber McNeil moves out as fast as she can. The other Girls} start giggling and covering themselves.

beer seracearre

GIRL #1 Who's that? Who's back there?

GIPL #2 Fob Horny bastards! Get out of there!

The {Girls are not leaving, however, “They are! amused ‘and /slightly titillated. Tommy jumps in with; both feet. He gneaks in an_officious-sounding voice.

TOMMY

Don't be alarmed, girls. This is

your Health Department. We're here to check out all unlicensed pussies} If you haven't had yours checked in the last year; please step forward and - spread your legs. The! girls are covered with towels by now. They laugh among themselves.

eu. ....GIRL #1 “Who. is that? I recognize that voice, Who is that?

Y VY

aed

te E

; g ALC 84, rn

bows INUED: : , TOMMY . Oh! Originality, neatness and hygiene. | WENDY Thai's Tommy alright. Hey, listen, if Hee Wee's with you, don’t let him look... He'll get confused. GIRL#3 Youjguys are going to get in trquble! — PEE WEE ‘They're hot! These broads are hat! They want us to look. They’re Hot, I'mijtelling ya! , BILLY Well, they aren't leaving! TOMMY Let{s find out! With that, Tommy kneels down and places his face; right uy to the peephole. Ei CUT TO: THA FA. THE OTHER aa OF THE SHOWER WALL A disembodied tongue comes

Bight.

FO see

And we see a pozing through the wall.

The

writhes ina Hendy starts|creeping forwar in a muted fashion without withdrawing

What are they doing?

On¢

No

FHE SHOWER ROOM

Wendy Liquified shower soap right

strange sight: It

irls squeal and carry on.

absurd, mock-jascivious w

d. Tommy s

ay

PEE [WEE .

of them is coming for it. TOMMY

shit!

ommy and po in the midd

ur le

come up to 4

\e WY

is a thorqughly rid Tommy's t

peaks to § his tongue.

CUT TQ:

a handful of To '

(CONTINUED]

VY

itculous longue

-ee Wee

46) +

CONTINUED :

The tongue ae a toes inside the w and cursing. ee Wee and Billy lau stands up.

Tommy takes hold of his Pee |

With that, it] through the|small opening. ical. We...

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WALL

Wendy is hovering over the tongue to come out again Instead, pops through like Punch of Punch an jaw drops and she runs back to the « and laughing. '

_ Ghickee! L AENDY

Hey, wait a minute.. i

ATA 35

+E / ll, Tommiy eh Like hel

D play

benis and) b Nee and Bal

LL.

CUT

Tommy's 1i 1 Judy. pbther girls

ickee,

pe. Here,

-I know that guy

Thd girls nearly fall down laughing! Tommy, Of course, is flugh against the wall and cannot

see what is happening. Billy. looks at Pee Wee.

THE SHOWER ROOM

and we hear the familiar "KONG" THEME. looking outside the shower room, The Girls immediately don serious fices Miss Balbricker looks suspicig We ZOOM TO what

silent, Miss Balbricker. and scurry off. the room. Her eyes go wide.

Then

Tommy's limp penis hanging ridiculously out of Miss Balbricker's eyes light up like a slot ma

The Git

ay

is spitting 1. Tommy

egins forcing ly are hyster-

TO:

al

hole rerieg the

p member endy's squealing

xe must depend on Pee Wee and Suddenly, the Gitls go conpretely silent.

i What is it? soy s going ion? We... |

Tommy

T/TO:

rls are in walks

bhusly around he sees: the wall. chine.

Ue

C) 80

ay

CONTINUED :

She hunches her s of her, Grade Z horror mo shower room towar

INSIDE THE WALL cd

om,

Oh shit! Billy signals fran

What...? Hold sti it. She is. .]}. ( Oh, yeah. Hold on, Are you

At this point, Mis shower stall, reac holding onto it wi

I've god know it' pervert little d

Tommy cries out in a word; lest that support her presen

looking for all the world 1

FQ ye Sc

and setonalne hands;

oulders ut in} front a some monster in a

She creeps on tiptoes apross the We,

Le.

Tommy ‘s helpless member.

CUT| TO:

SIA

Hey, Tommy...

tically for him to

_ BILLY 1, man. She's coming for

shut up.

Sn ee

TOMMY ©

man.

} TOMMY | kidding? |

it.

sent ee tg tee

s Balbricker, having crossed to the hes out and grabs! Tommy's penis, fiercely Pa a viselike grip. | '

s you, you filthy! Littl -- you freak, you dirty; | egenerate. ’

pain and surprise, but! he |dare not say give.Miss Balbricker the evidence to t surmise. J

‘

' (CONTINUED)

YY

\~

THE TRAINING ROOM,

And she runs smack into the wall, rear end and bloodying her head.

2D:

CONTINUED :

In the interin, Mac and Pee Wee Tommy's face ig blue. bricker tugs ba Tommy pulls, gy Silent tug of W

slips out of Miss Balbricker's inon grip,

SIA.

have

tumbling on her; butt

THE BACK TO THE BOYS’

ows" LOCKER ROOM - DAY (INTE — ow a

To

P

ef?

Miss Balbricker begins by running along t’ shower room, hollering as she does so.

8)

y, inja blind pa path py which he

I know it's you.

anywhere. me. I got

as Tommy

unting ,

im SOB Sic SD

He tugs

Balbrickey pulls,

and Tommy likewise,

eee

AND

is tryimg to wriggle fre¢, Billy ca off, : Febemaen with laughter. with great] pain. ck and pulils Tommy flush up agains prunting r goes on until finally Tommy's se¢apy penis

fiss Bal-

the wall. The

sending | her

ic, pulls up his pants,

ie

you

You can’t escape from >

you now.

and the pese is on.

" SHOWER ROOM. TO LOCKER ROOM - DAY

and retraces came as fast as he possibly can.

he wall in ithe

knocking herself onto her Tommy picks up pre¢

lous

seconds as a dazed Miss Balbricker regains her equilibrium, a

Tommy makes it up into the training room and ‘through into the boy's locker room before Miss Balbricker manages to cross the gym floor and starts up the stairs to the boy's

locker room. “down the stairs.

“We see Tommy running past the track and field boys;

Goodenough, Brackett and Warren are coming balbricker-runs right over-to them.-.

then past the football players; and then past his own basketball collegues; past Billy and Pee Wee, whom he curses roundly as he runs by; and into the furthest end of

the shower room. Now, hot on his heels, comes Miss Balbricker,

and right.

such fire in her eye that she's unaware of the naked boys to her left She passes the naked track and field men; passes the naked football players (Coaches Brackett,

«he Wacren

and Goodenough pop their heads out of their offices and

stare in absolute disbelief).

ketball locker room.

And now she's into the bas-

Miss Balbricker reaches the basketball shower room -- and slips on the soapy water which is all over the floor.

C)- 83

Landing on her rear, she plows through eight or ten guys,

knocking half of them over, front of Tommy, who is lathering himself up.

a

position on the soapy floor,

to drop in.

good of you

CLOSEUP ®F AN EYEBALL - DAY

until she comes to a stop in

As Miss Balbricker glares up at Tommy from her prone Tommy smiles beatifically.

ADMENISTRATIVE OFFICE OUTSIDE PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE -

And we spon realize the eyeball is looking through the

keyhole fo the principal's office. | BT

then|CUT TO

(We'll begin the scene with the keyhole POV, a normal filming of the scene.)

Miss Balbricker, Coach Goodenough, Coach Brackett

and Coach

Warren sit facing the principal, a kind-faced conservative-

demeanored man of about fifty named MR. CARTER. scene begins, Miss Balbricker is making an impass

. MISS BALBRICKER . and.I think it's the only way we're going to find that boy...

REACTION SHOTS

Mr. Carter and Coach Goodenough are incredulous.

As the

ioned plea:

Coach

Brackett and Coach Warren are fighting to keep from

laughing.

BACK TO SCENE z= MR: CARTER

-Miss Balbricker, you're not really suggesting that I ask.

MISS BALBRICKER ‘ That penis had a mole on it. I'd recognize;that penis anywhere.

CONTINUED: ° oy

Coaches Brackett and Warren are biting their lips until they bleed, faking sneezes, coughing -- anything so as not to betray their laughter.

MISS BALBRICKER ‘ (continuing)

Despite the} juvenile snickers of

some, this is a serious matter.

This... this... seducer and

despoiler must be stopped. He

is extremely dangerous, and, Mr.

Carter, I'm certain everyone in

this room knows who that is. He's

a contemptible little pervert who's

wr

been... MR. CARTER Miss Balbricker! B70. | “MISS BALBRICKER Well, I'm sorry, but I've got him now and I'm not going to let him ? wf F slip through my fingers again. lola E7R

“t it this faux pas, even Coach Goodenough has to bite his ip to suppress a guffaw.

} MISS BALBRICKER

(continuing; frantic) Now all I'm asking is that you give me five boys for a few minutes. The coaches can be present. Tommy Turner and any four boys you see fit to choose. And we... and we... can stop this menace. And it is a menace.

$ext re

a, MR. CARTER

Five boys in the nude! A police lineup so you can identify his... his... talltywacker...

tir. Carter looks at the coaches.

Can we call: it -- tallywacker... i . p-p-p-penis is so... uh... personal. :

to avoid embarrassment. | (MORE) , : een

VS | VY | (CONTINUED) V

Naw

are

27 | | ao

CONTINUED: (2) —— 2 MISS BALBRICKER (CONT'D) Listen... wethave to do it, as distasteful as it is. I know it's him and... and that... tallywacker had a-mole. {That mole is the key to it...

By

Fhis time, even Mr.|/Carter is beginning to cra¢k.

MR. CARTER

Miss Balbricker, I'm sure you can recognize the difficulty of such

a request. f£'d like to apprehend this young man myself, but imagine what the Board of Education would say if you were granted a. a... lineup of naked young men to examine their... private parts for an incriminating mole...

Brackett can restrain ‘thimself no longer. . Everything he

but thel

says in the following iparagraph is broken up by cpnvulsive

silent laughter. jiAs he progresses, he can barely get words out.

(laughter) We... we call the police and we have them send over one of their sketch artists...

(laughter)

And Miss Balbricker can give a description!..

Warren and Goodenough!have turned their backs in:laughter.

.| Carter is now busting a gut to keep from laughing.

Brackett is sinking lower and lower in his chair;

é

COACH BRACKETT | (continuing) ».. and we Can put up... (laughter) . wanted posters... all over school,

Brackett is barely coherent by now. Tears are coming to

Mr.

a

Carter's eyes. ; ‘ ‘

V SY | come)

~wr.

~se

. S7¢ £9 202 91, an 87 coNTuAUED: 3) oT) ETS |

~ COACH BRACKETT ‘ (continuing) Have you s@en this prick... Report immediately to Beulah Balbricker ... Do not jattempt to apprehend

this prick.].. as it is armed and dangerous. |, eel

an a a | Re met :

—T Close-up of a large wanted poster _ hand drawn, but well rendered. It depicts a large penis with an arrow pointing to the telltale mole with the word "mole" written beside the arrow. The following caption punctuates the poster:

HAVE YOU SEEN THIS PECKER! !!

DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES , ATTEMPT TO APPREHEND THIS PECKER. BUT REPORT IMMEDIATELY TO BEULAH

io. . BALBRICKER. a ALIAS: MONSIEUR LA COCK... THE ~ oo TALLYWACKER.

LAST SEEN HANGING OUT IN THE GIRLS' LOCKER ROOM AT PORT AUBURNDALE HIGH.

REMEMBER: THIS PECKER IS ARMED AND DANGEROUS.

CAMERA PULLS BACK to see Miss Balbricker as she angrily rips it down. As she walks on, we hear a voice call out -- very high-pitched and softly.

Miss Balbricker wheels about and stares furiously at the students. Then, from another part of the corridor.

_. ANOTHER STUDENT'S VOICE Pecker-checker.

She wheels the other way. Everyone is innocent. The word

is repeated by five or six more voices, growing louder

Ra each time. Finally, every student in the corridor is say-

a . ing it, saying it more loudly and more insistently, so that “ Miss Balbricker must walk through a veritable chorus of

high-pitched voices calling:

VY’ (CONTINUED)

Yeah, that's terriff

I'll say! enforcer.

Everyone continues dressing in silence.

heads up to the court. He is confused |

after Brian.

That's great, Tim.

Cy _88 CONTINUED: -STUDENTS' VOICES | Pecker-checker... Be nee er ej PECKER-CHECKER... PECKER-CHECKER!!! | “39 INT. LOCKER ROOM - DAY ohlas : * Tim steps out of Coach Gooderlough's office. He stands there a moment thinking. He jlooks toward the locker room where the guys are dressing. { He is thoughtful. Finally, he heads toward the guys. 7 Everyone is hushed as Tim comes toward them. He opens his locker, takes out his gear and starts to undress. BILLY Coach gonna let you play tonight? TIM }, Yeah, I been re-ingtated. Tim doesn't look up at anyone but the others all look at Brian. They know he has interceded for Tim. Tim knows -_ . it also, but he doesn’t want ‘to face the implications as yet.

Le. PEE WEE Us little guys need our

Brian gets up and CAMERA MOVES IN on Tim as he looks

merece

We hear the strains of Eddie Fisher's version of "ANYTIME." CAMERA PULLS BACK to discover that we are in the middle of

Billy is dancing with Ginny. Joruay TOMMY

pa an after-game dance. and Wendy dance by. Where's Mickey? y VY

oO CONTINUED:

Tommy indicates the other side of the patio where Meat stands talking with Pee Wee and Tim. Meat sees them look-

‘ing his way and throws up his hands in frustration. He

yells across the patio: . Gar MEAT a He gave me the slip! BILLY Damn! TOMMY

Should we go out there?

Tommy acknowledges the truth of this Suddenly their at- tention is caught by a COMMOTION 0.S! Tommy and Billy look at one another with concern, then SPLIT FRAME toward the disturbance. CAMERA ZOCMS PAST themjto Tim who looks

shocked.

cut TO:

ANGLE

We see why Tim is concerned. Tim's father and Brian are. squared off. Tim's father has obviously been taunting

‘Brian. The girl who is with Cavanaugh senior tries to

pull him away. He shrugs her off and continues to bait Brian. The sight of this 33-year-old thug abusing an 18-year-old high school kid is sickening. Cavanaugh is a sick man. He is singing an old anti-semitic ditty.

Brian is frightened and it shows, but he won't back aown.

CONTINUED :

That's more than Brian can stand. He moves toward Cavanaugh. Suddenly Tim steps INTO FRAME between his father and Brian.

Tim's father stops short and stares at the boy.

Cavanaugh's tone is chilling.

* CAVANAUGH Who you talking to, boy. TIM - (measured)

Trash, pure trash.

Tim's father explodes and slaps Tim viciously actoss the face. Tim doesn't flinch. He just takes a deepjbreath, pauses for a second. The crowd is stunned.

U6 TIM | ee

_ (continuing) —_ Be sure you're finished! 'Cause

this is the last time you'll ever

lay a hand on me!

G8

; CONTINUED: (2) | G D

aia

Tim's father goes insane. He slaps Tim with both hands as hard and fast as he can swing. Tim doesn’t even attempt to cover up. Finally his father stops and grabs Tim by the

throat with one hand,jpushing him against the wa]l. Blood trickles from Tim's nbse. A teachef tries to intrude. Cavanaugh throws the man to the gropnd and turns back to

Tin.

Got any more smart talk?

Suddenly, a large hand reaches out and grab him around. CAMERA PULLS BACK to se

belongs to Ted Jarvis. Ted sends a crushin smashing straight into Cavanaugh's face. C flat on his back, semi-conscious. Tim's fa

by any means and would probably kill was a devastating right hand. Tim's dily to his feet. Ted steps forward.

TIM

No! Everyone turns to look at Tim.

HE CAVANAUGH G “iE

shel iS Lo

Mm .

Let him go. I'm not afraid of hi I'm never going back.

He addresses his father.

Don't you ever come near me again!

If you do, I'll kill you.

Tim's father grins at Tim, aly

Tim stares at him.

~—

you, I'd rather be queer. Y

ce

5 his armjand. e that the hand

EP right cyoss AVanaugh s

ther is net a Ted if he could father stumbles

rd.

sprawls

; (CONTINUED)

ne ad

con

(I

(3)

This is a tremendous affront.

CONTINUED :

Tim's father starts toward

Tim. . Coach Brackett steps forward, as do Tommy, Billy and

the rest, including Brian.

3 OACH BRACKETT I'm going to have you put under a peace bend, Mr.| Cavanaugh. If you come near this jboy again, I'll have you arrested,

Tim's father throws Ted's arm off savagely and

He looks at Ted.

CAVANAUGH

I'll be seeing lyou, again.

qf

I'll be looking forward to it, Slime, . : .

Cavanaugh turns and walks off.

. COACH BRACKETT You alright, Tim?

Tim looks at them; he is self-conscious. moment, heavy with emotion. Coach Brackett br

in typical fashion. COACH BRACKETT Okay, boys. If you're gonna kiss

each other, let’s get it over with, otherwise, let's get on with the

dance. —

Everybody laughs and loosens up. They pat Tim They are a united group of young men.

TED . Be

Everyone gathe}

backs away.

(ie

pres

fs around Tim.

Ted take

It ig an awkward

baks it up.

on the tack. 2s Tommy aside.

V/

97,

TK

CONTINUED: (4)

+

* CUT TO:

GZ E93

ene

eesoccoetenat™

ANGLE - THE EeOne ON THE DANCE FLOOR ©

parts as someone we cannot see surges through. Finally, the crowd parts and we see --

ANGLE

A shockingly beaten and battered Mickey Jarvis. He's holding tenaciously to something in his hand, but he's only semi-conscious, only remotely aware of where he is. A hush falls over the crowd as Mickey stumbles out into the middle of the patio.

' MICKEY I knocked the fucker's tooth out.

And so saying, Mickey topples LOrward » pitching face-down onto the floor. Gu

. —— Ted is at his side almost immediately. He bends over his brother as our principals and the others crowd around.

(babbling, incoherent) .. should see how he looks, man... got his tooth, Ted... fucked him up good..

BRACKETT

makes his way to Mickey. He conducts a quick examination, then turns to Ted with a look of great concern on his face.

r

he turns to the guys.

TED

I'll see you guys. BILLY

Just you? 7

TED

No, half a dozen guys from} the force are going out.

. TED No but's, Pee Wee. J couldn't

allow one of Ge. ae to: or t hurt.

contin

Brian steps forward.

They all look at Brian.

What d'ya mean, Brian?

They all look at each other.

Alright. that. What'd

h TED m fpr ya got in cine?

&-

P—

Mickey is being placed in the ambulafce., Billy, Brian and all the guys are there with Ted and Coach Brackett. Ted closes the ambulance door and the ampulance Pulls off.

Ted stares after the ambulance for a}/long moment. ;

“Then

q1S¢

—

{4

95 | CONTINUED:

oN hear them,

_ Everybody pad Brian —_ a Y

GSR,

A eaeaeein Ea

GS

—p ODD"

Ted and Brian walk over to Ted’s car and converse. We cannot

The guys watch them, Brackett eyes) e: _

—_—— _ COACH BRACKETT Count me in. '

They all turn to look at Brackett.

. COACH BRACKETT Are you kidding? I'm long gone after this semester anyway. And don't call me Coach anymore. I'm

only 23, for Christ sakes. Call

me Roy. -

They all look at Brackett in disbelief. Brackett points to a scar on his forehead.

applauds and yells approval. At this moment Ted come back to the group.

a 95 Ce . 96

‘Briah turns and walks off.

4q#Ebd 100. CONTINUED: (2)

Ted {starts to Leave.

Ted fleaves,

They}ail stare after him, commenting on his arcane behavior. CAMERA PANS over to Tim who looks intently after Brian. Finally, he starts OUT OF FRAME.

ae : CUT TO:

BRIAN

getting into his car, a late model Thunderbird. Tis ENTERS FRAME and walks up to Brian's car and opens the door and sits down on the passenger side. Brian looks at him.

Brian smiles.

(CONTINUED) _

% . a a

Sd

Brian indicates Ted.

CONTINUED :

Tim looks at Brian. It's a nice moment.

a building. It is Porky's. comes to: a schematic view

ES TO PAN, it takes in

arts, photographs of Porky's, uarters, etc. Finally,

he whole room. It is ob- aftsman’s room with skylights

CAMERA HOLDS on a blueprint o CAMERA PANS ALONG the wall an of Porky's. As CAMERA CONTIN various road maps, waterway c as well as the Sheriff's head CAMERA PULLS BACK to take in viously an artist's loft or d and many workbenches and engimeer easels. It has been converted into a “war.room'' far the war on Porky. 0O.S.

we hear Tommy's voice. i G78

CAMERA PULLS BACK to see all the guys: Tommy,/Billy, Pee Wee, Meat, Tim, Ted and Brackett... and finally, Brian.

It used to be my dad's drafting studio -- but now it's the war

room! TED Hell, I'm impressed! MEAT

How did ya get all this stuff?

; ' BRIAN

Tim and I did a little homework last night and today at the Marsh County courthouse. And Ted pulled a few strings.

- TED Simple enough.

-

97a.

CONTINUED :

He takes up a military-type pointler and points to the photos

of Porky's and the Sheriff's headquarters.

_ TED (continuing)

These are the objectives: Porky's and the Sheriff's headquarters.

aA

”

re going remember.

looks at Ted blankly.

Everybody |. Finally Tommy breaks the silence. ‘ TOMMY ‘What does that mean? TIM Gather ‘round and witnebs genius at work.

chree squads, Bt of two praft. Our hr onized

perfectly... And we PAN DOWN to the model of Porky's and... ~~ DISSOLVE TO:

INTO A NONVERBAL MONTAGE, ORCHESTRATED wine SOUND EFFECTS AND THE MUSIC FROM PORKY * S BAND. ;

see a figure swimming beneath the surface. Suddenly the figure breaks the surface. It is Brian. Brian is ‘towing a cable. He hands the cable up toward a figure, who is straddling the pilings that hold up -Porky's. The figure is Brackett--and-he-is-straddling the pilings with a telephone lineman's rig, and applying a gas powered Saw to the pilings. Brian

| |

102A

hands the cable up to Brackett and Brackett wraps the cable around the piling and hooks it. Camera zooms past Brackett to the front side of the bar where we see Tommy and Billy performing a similiar duty with a saw on the front pilings. a t

C.U. TOMMY & BILLY:

We see that Billy is astride the pole and Tommy is supporting him.. The water'is only waist deep. Suddenly, we see Meat lean over from the shore and whistle sharply. Billy slides down the pole and out of sight. The saw is secured to the piling and hangs safely.

C.U. MBAR:

We see Meat straighten up and walk toward a truck

where Pee Wee leans drinking a beer. In the B.G.

behind Meat, we see the reason for Meat's warning. A group of drunken Rednecks reek out of Porky's on the way to their car.

We see Brian pull himself up into the boat and tighten the wrench. The cable draws tight and we can see, of course, that it is attached to Porky's pilings about thirty yards away. Brackett is now working

on another pole. C.U. TOMMY & BILLY:

They pop up form beneath the water. The drunken party is gone. Billy resumes his. work.

a

aq 00 7 - 203

CAMERA ESTABLISHES a sign. identifying a panel T-frame structurfe as Sheriff Wallace's office. Like his brother's club, Sheriff Wallace's office backs upd to the Everglades

canal. CAMERA PANS DOWN TO...

THE SHERIFF'S PARKING LOT

Two polife cruisers are parked out front. From within

e SOUND of Sheriff Wallace and his deputies

comes th playing POKER and the BLARE OF COUNTRY MUSIC over a RADIO. 1COR INSERT ANGLE lO] OIA , ny ————

Harkness we jsee Tim tinkering with each of the cars], though we can't tlell what he's doing. When he's finishéd, Tim sfarts runni through the bush from Sheriff Wallace's to Porky's, a distance of just a half mile.

ANGLE —

We see Billy and Tommy connecting the ropes they've tied to the pilings to the trailer hitches of |two pickup trucks through the use of grappling hooks. ;

eel

Under cover of

We see Pee Wee and Meat at work under the "entrance" and "exit" bridges which traverse the canal in front of Porky's

| complex.

C.U. TOMMY & BILLY:

ANGLE

We see Meat and Pee Wee finish their work at the bridges.

ANGLE

We see Tommy wade into the lake and swim uietly out t the power boat Brackett is manning. He climbs in. °

COACH BRACKETT ‘ Everything go alright?

(CONTINUED) ©

CONTINUED: a04 COACH BRACKETT

It was like being a ranger again,

even if just for a few hours. Good

luck, kiddo. I'll have everything

ready at the county line.

‘Brackett Smiles and salutes, then slips overboard and

swims toward shore.

_ ANGLE

We see Tim break through the bushes into the parking lot. He joins Billy, Pee Wee and Meat. Now, their task is completed.

ANGLE 10°77 € 108

We see Brackett Brrive on shore, signal to Billy's group that everything's’ set out on the water, then continue across the parking lot, across the “exit" bridge, and on tp where his car is parked. He drives

off.

ANGLE .

CAMERA EMPHASIZES Billy's group. Billy walks up and pulls the truck 'p power horn.

ANGLE

CAMERA EMPHASIZES Tommy and Brian in their side-by-side power boats. They hear the signal.

Brian trumpets a return birdcall signal, also once. ANGLE

CAMERA EMPHASIZES Billy's group -- off to the sides. Billy has heard the return signal.

“BILLY They're ready.

They pile into the truck.

lll

Li2

aa

{#3

Some time has passed. The parking lot is nearly empty.

The B with famou custo! Billy signa

Brian

AND can be heard playing its final set, concluding

A number like "Good Night, Ladies" or some other

Ss and recognizable "signoff" song.. The few remaining mers drift out to their cars and drive off. ©

surveys the scene. Satisfied, he makes the birdcall 1 twice. U2 DUT ON THE GANAL - NIGHT and Tommy hear the signal.

They start the engines and Brian returns the birdcall

-Signa], twice.

ene

CAMERA EMPHASIZES Billy, Tim, Meat and Pee Wee.

~~

Ww

Qe | a “106. CONTINUED: .

And tHe four boys walk out of the bushes and stride rgso-

lutely into Porky's. ‘ 7 + 4 lis

As it's closing time, the boys weren't stopped at the door. They've made it into the main room without really being noticed. The band members are packing their instruments; some stragglers are making theirjway toward the door, most weaving drunkenly, a few not; the Bartender is cleaning up; the Bouncers are smoking a finaljcigarette; etc.

With Tim, Meat and Pee Wee backing him up, Billy steps forward. He shouts out his words.

’ BILLY Listen up, now!

REACTION SHOTS

The room goes quiet. Most peoplg look at Billy in confusion. At this point Billy begins to call the hogs in the classic.

way pigs are called around the wdrld: "Suey... suey... suey...'' He keeps this up for ahout twenty seconds and then says...

BILLY -

Tell the pig that the Hoys from Port Auburndale are here. Tell him to bring the best He's got and meet us in the parking lot -- NOW! |

And Billy leads Tim, Meat and Ped Wee back out of the club to the parking lot. ; _ if LIGA

Billy, Tim, Meat and Pee Wee stand near their two pickup trucks.

Now Porky emerges from the club, backed by three bouncers and the Bartender. Some customers and a band member or two gather to watch. Porky and his henchmen are carrying clubs and chains.

a 107. _116 _ CONTINUED: . [6A

keeps.

. BILLY (to his buddies) Okay, let's do it.

Billy and Tim run toward one truck; Meat [and Pee Wee run toward the other. Porky and his henchmen are too confused

to do anything but stand and stare.

PORKY

Billy gets behind the wheel of his truckjand gives its power HORN TWO ear-piercing BLASTS.

i EXT. OUT ON THE CANAL - NIGHT

Brian and Tommy have been sitting in their power boats with the motors idling. They hear the signal, and Brian immedi- ately sends back two equally ear-piercing BLASTS FROM A HORN

Ww attached to his boat. Now he turns to Tommy:

i BRIAN Let's go.

And they GUN THE:MOTORS of the boats, each heading his boat. away from the other, so as to pull loose the pilings on one side or the other of the pier.

| |

Billy guns his truck, Meat and Pee Wee pull the cables out from the sand and gravel, hook it on the truck ; and leap aboard. As Porky and his henchmen look on dumbfounded, the SOUND OF THE.POWER BOATS merges with

the SOUND OF THE TRUCKS.

\

We see the ropes from the trtick pulled taut, ‘and now we begin to hear the pilings give way. Porky’s pier and Porky’s itself is beginning to shake and topple.

The ropes from Brian's and Tommy's boats are also pulled taut, and the pilings they're pulling are beginning to give way. INTERCUT between Brian's and Tommy's smiling

— and satisfied faces.

"1207

1207

120K

120L 120M 120N 120P 120R 120s

120V 120W

LuUs

Porky is standing in the ‘middle of entrance of Porky's when suddenly i and Porky and his henchmen fall int 'C.U. BOYS IN TRUCK CAB.

‘C.U. BRIAN

C.U. TOMMY

+ C.U. CABLE PULLING TAUT.

C.U. PILINGS Sherr ENG FROM BOATS

“ LONG- SHOT OF TRUCK REARING

C.U. TRUCK WHEELS SPINNING

c.u. WATER CHURNING BEHIND BOAT C.U. PEE WEE AND MEAT IN TRUCK BED C.U. PORKY'S SIGN ARCING AND SPARKS MED. SHOT PORKY'S GROUP -

C.U. PORKY |

SLO-MO SHOT OF TRUCK PILINGS GIVING SHOT OF TRUCK LEAPING FORWARD . SHOT OF BOAT PILINGS GIVING WAY C.U. PORKY'S SIGN COLLAPSES

SHOT. OF PORKY'S TWO PIGS RACING OUT

SHOT OF TWO PEOPLE RACING OUT OF PO IN WATER AS BRIDGE HAS COLLAPSED.

BOATS LEAP FORWARD

THREE CAMERA'S OF PORKY'S COLLAPSIN 1l- SLO-MO. ~

Porky and group hurry out of water

And now Porky's starts coming down, stands and sinking, along with its

shallow water and mud of the canal.

Porky is running about aimlessly.

PORKY

I want those fuckers dead.

~- I want them dead!

the bridge to the t gives way under stress o the water.

FLYING

WAY

OF JOINT

RKY'S, AND FALLING

G:

as bridge collapses. collapsing where it pier, into the

He yells to the Bartender.

Dead

121 |

108A

We see Sheriff Wallace runs to his desk. -. He turns to

his two DEPUTIES.

The Deputies pick up shotguns, pistols,

billy clubs, brass

knuckles, cattle prods, chains. -- every weapon imaginable ~- and head out the door. The Sheriff has lingered behind a moment to select and load his favorite sawed-off shotgun

-~- with dumb~dumb shells.

224 1228

et into a car p

The first two Deputies

rked directly in

front of the Sheriff's office. They flpor the gas pedal, but instead of going forward Tim has rigged the car to

plate glass facade and

The Sheriff is standing behind his desk|,

‘go only in reverse -- which it does, right through the into the Sheriff|'s office.

[22¢ (24

completing the

task of loading his shotgun. Now, all pf a suddenj this

police car is zooming batkwards through

his window; into

his office, carrying his desk and him Ehrough the flimsy

rear wall of his office and out into the canal.

N/

125 |

[23 4124 | | 109.

The water is deep and the Sheriff can't swim.

The two Deputies have freed thenselves from the police car which is submerged nose-down, rear bumper-up in a dozen feet of water. The Sheriff's desk floats by.

The Sheriff grabs a desk drawer] which promptly comes slid- ing out of the desk, leaving him no better off. Now he grabs a corner or a leg of his qesk, while the Deputies grab some other portion of the desk. They begin to swim toward shore, awinma-ng with one lhand and holding the desk with the other. The Sheriff rene the desk with both hands

-- holds it for dear life. . a

We see Brian and Tommy unhook the ropes from their power boats. Now they pull up alongside one another.

. TOMMY And all done. Let's head for home.

Brian waves his accord, and the two boys speed their boats

in the direction of the Sheriff’s office which is on their route back to Port Auburndale.

OMIT.

127, 1.28

Their job finished, it's time for Billy and the guys to make their escape. As Billy and Meat keep their trucks' motors going, Tim and Pee Wee leap out and undo the grap- pling hooks. Seeing two of the boys on the ground, Porky comes running over. Tim and Pee Wee scamper back into the trucks, and Billy and Be drive over the little bridges. / f > | Now, aS Porky gets near the Bridge, Pee Wee pushes the remote switch and DETQNATES the plastic EXPLOSIVES under 0 that brifge. The bridge BLOWS |Jand dirt and mud fly upon (27E

Porky's face. Tim now detonatds the second bridge. Nothing happens. . (ATE TIM Damn. BILLY

Forget it. |Let's jugt get going.

And they take off, Medt and Ped: Wee's truck right behind them.

qqeeerchresnone ——

Porky drags himself off the ground. His hencimen rush over to him. Porky is a mess.

BOUNCER #1 You okay, Porky?

Porky notices one bridge is still standing.

And he and the three Bouncers and the Bartender pile into two cars and set out in pursuit of Billy and Meat 's trucks.

demoscene

_—_———————

The Sheriff and the two Deputies who went into the canal with him are climbing up the bank into the parking lot area.

“T31

Boe,

itmeenean’

|A8

CI,

dot de

. PARKING LOT OUTSIDE THE SHERIFF'S OFFICE - NIGHT

The Sheriff and the first two Deputies have reached the

parking lot. standing around waiting for him.

Move it. 129

They all pile in the 2 Femaining car, the wheel and starts t the wheels falls off.

lying impotent in the

Get going.

weeshommees

- OMe at a time... dirt parking lot.

he motor, and as he does.. until the car is

Now the Sheriff notices two other Deputies He flares in anger.

The Deputy gets behind

. each of

THE SHERIFF'S POV - NIGHT

The Sheriff sees Billy's pickup truck drive by followed by

Meat's pickup truck. Porky's Bouncers and the Bartender.

Then comes a car carrying two of

[S31 2132

The Sheriff realizes there's a chase on. He

& - NIGHT

leaps out of

the police car just in time to hail Porky's far as it drives by. SHERIFF Hey! -Yo, Porky! Hold it! Hold ik!

Porky SCREECHES HIS CAR to a halt. The Sher

five Deputies rush up.

The six men pile in with Porky and one Bounc

chase continues. (338 1338

SEWARD COUNTY LINE] - NIGHT

This is a CHASE SE FORTH between the various cars side the cars -- which such a s

+~ inside the

hues, Porky's trucks. Theh...

As the chase conti Billy's and Meat's

wy

Hff and his

ar and the

ae nen

i SHERIFF'S OFFICE AND THE

NUENCE, with all the CUTTING BACK AND

cars and out-

Pquence implies.

cars begin gaining on

ooo

‘133A

POV - NIGHT

At first, all

but they're ée

We'

we can se@ a

BI

TI

Yeah.

Yea

As Billy's tr

and more prof happening yet

en

- EXT. THE SEWARD COUNTY LINE - NIGHT

ick gets clos

bcorecy

nough to make Bi

re going to make

[24

re

M

LLY

er,

«~~

ay.

JUST BEYOND THE | wARD COUNTY LINE - BILLY'S

some lights in the distance, lly smile.

+

the lights grow bright, larger ase -- but we “pees know exactly what's

Billy's truck and Meat's truck cross the line and continue on about two hundred yards.

Porky's two cars cross the line inadvertently, skidding to a halt about one hundred yards into Seward County.

(364

COUNTY LINE -.

Suddenly Seward County

several Port Auburndale sc ing the Port Auburndale ba the Port Auburnda Miss Honeywell, Coach Brac

leaders, student bbddy.

As the Seward

cheer goes up; the BAND § ; and the stu priate fight song.

begin a cheer

the area is bathe

[SiS

CANAL JUST

police cars,

County poric

md ,

d in light -

including

hoeol buses, the Por le majorett kett and ha

e surround ARTS TO PLA Hents begin

Billy, Tim, Meat and Pee Wee pile out . BILLY (making a] victory sign) We did it. MEAT

an

Hey, where's =e

[26a

NSIDE THE SEWARD

Yi;

VY

-} light from Ted's, lights rloodlights tl Auburndale eb, Wendy, Ginny, . 1E the Port Atiburndale

Porky's cars, the cheerleaders Singing an a

ISD

five

from iiluminat- pheer-

a huge

pro-

b£ their trurks.

VU.

A group of students carry

out Mic

able approximation of a lfitter on

huge CHEER goes up for Mickey. thing of that ard

Now, as Porky and back in police clothes,

‘They'd been thez just tonight.

coo, Porky realizes the trap they're in. hand over his brother's mquth, toilead him away.

( ve made:a mistake. uldn't have been

ay

_Arrest those little mot

They destroyed my nighteélub. - TED How'd. they do that, sir? - PORKY Well, first they came in and..| TED Which ones... came in? ~ PDRKY That one and ae one oyer theye... D (mock in¢redulity) You mean... thié sevent pen-year|- old... and this] sixteen: ryear- -olid youngster were in your establishment. SHERIFF

—

(pointin

ia

er.

the Sheriff get steps for PbRKY

to our

guys)

(interrupting; apoplectic)

(pointing to Mic

Particularly that one.

fucker kept coming backiover ard...

Uh...

Fuckin'-A right. crazy, Porky?

‘we must h Obviously, it eq these youngsters...

fds

(MORE)

Y

key)

een we ree

it was.

Pp might Give me

out of ward to

[s6E | ae TSE - 1SE

key on the closdst reason

he

“=

construct. A an M,” or some-

their calrs, deal with them.

re before -- not

ijLittle

Man,

(36

; it nherfuckers.

you —

He tries to put his

CONTINUED)

$ Vv V/ N/

Ted ,3

Y

} ‘ ‘ M .

a

260 (368 136T (36E 1Bep

See. LOE [366

136 CONTINUED: (2)

on felpny charges -- destruction of private property, assault and aE Reny au

Ted smashes the headlights] on Porkyj's car.

Porky peels the money off ' roll. He handg it to Ted.

Ted takes a rioti gun and blows a hole through the engine . completely disabling if. Then he SHOOTS out the tires.

- PORKY How mjch, Officey? You name Ve.

that county line| and the} promise from your brother that al peccadilloes that might have occuryed tonight!will be pomeeetan:

ft

SHERIFF

' Stickjit up yourl..

Porky puts his hand over nbs brother's mouth once more.

} Vv V VY (CONTINUED)

* V

S6F oad

136 CONTINUED: 3)

“ale.

. Agaim Porky westrainsjthe Sherjff in the: same manner.

chips? SHERIF (very softly) I. J}. promisé. TED i

Car}'t hear you, Sherj{ff.

ee ee re reuE

Porky puts h#s hand a¢ross the Sheriff's mouth one last time.

TED {

(menacing)

How's that?

i

SHERIF? }

(growing subdded)

I Aromise. f° _

i

TED i

Now get this car outjof Seward i County.

i SHERIFE & PORKY i Buti you shog the engine... the tires are flat...

TRARY rs tae

ee at aed

E TED ;

Just put a jittle wejght pense Le. i

You! boys cag manage paees i : of H i (SQe&

Big LAUGH from the crqwd. Porky, with Sheriff and Deputies, starts pushing the cay. With four flat:tires, the effort is enormous. | At this|point cakes steps forward and raises) his hands to ‘silence the crowd; A hush'falls over the crowd. Mickey walks up slowly‘to Porky ;who is still bemt over! the car bushing.| Mickey gays: :

i

a“ -—

i

"| -o\

[S6F 0

mney

CONTINUED: (4)

Hey, Porky,

pereraraartcine,

MICKEY

to say to you...

Yeah, what t

And Mickey does the fa’ cartoon.

‘A... behu... h... That's:

And with that, he gives Porky a ty through thé

which nearly sends him

PORKY

MICKEY

tremendous ROAR goes u

the entire scene.

cheer and we begin END CREDITS.

will be UNDER END CREDITS.

ANGLE

Bb

monger

he fuck's t

mous line wh

a-beh...u all folks!

p from the qd

are hoisted onto shoulders as CAME The BAND STRIKES UP.

i got just qne thing

at?

A-beh...

————

We see Brackett and Honeywell embracing.

ANGLE

We see Billy and Ginny embracing.

Pee Wee, Meat and Tim all congratulate each other and

Mickey.

ANGLE

Ted and Brackett shake hands. .

ANGLE

Ted and Mickey embrace.

4A

ANGLE

Mickey throws away his crutches.

lich ends every Porky Pig

remendous kick in the ass h radiator of the car. trowd and our principals TRA PULLS BACK to TAKE IN The cheerleaders Everything that follows

A

él

Suddenly a ROAR GOES UP FROM THE CROWD and we see the POWER

BOATS ROAR up Brian jump ashpre.

VY

‘ (CONTINUED)

ro the shoreline of the canal and Tommy and

4A

CONTINUED :

The crowd surges

onto shoulders ahd paraded over to the roadside.

forward and Brian and Tommy are hoisted

Brian

and Tommy join up with our other five to congratulate each congratulations are over, Tommy says:

other. When the

Man --

Pee Wee suddenly

looks dejected.

44 2 118. 141 CONTINUED: (2)

TOMMY |

, Hey, Pee Wee, you want to gé4t laid

; or not? If you're not cherny, you don't get Wendy! -

Pee Wee recants immediately.

_ PEE WEE Oh, I'm cherry, man! Cherry as George Washington's tree. You could put me on top of a bayana split, I'm so cherry.

Tommy looks at Wendy. | D } TOMMY To | Well? , . Wendy walks over and takes Pee Wee by the hand. WENDY

Alright, alright. Just keep it quiet. C'mon, shrimp. Let's get it over with.

She takes Pee Wee into one of the school buses.| The guys — wait outside to keep guard. CAMERA PANS to a clump of bushes over behind the bus. Something is lurking thers. Whoever

it is starts to move and suddenly darts out to a position behind the bus. It is too dark to see who it is.

42 BACK TO BUS

The guys look toward the bus expectantly. Suddenly a voice rises from inside. | <

WENDY'S VOICE

You dickhead! The first Fime you

come on the date wearing pne, now

_you don't have one at all}

We hear FOOTSTEPS scurrying down t bus. Pee Wee emer ces from the.door pulling on his pants.; We don't hear what he _ Says but we get the idea when the guys all start taking out their wallets. Finally someone hands Pee Wee one and he rushes back on the bus. i

Na CUT TO:

{ |

|

(

} 119. ANGLE EUS

We see the skulking figure. ft moves stealthily along the row of cars. We stiil can’t lsee who it is. CAMERA CUTS

TO the mystery figure's POV.

, a MYSTERY FIGURE "S POV We see Tommy and the group from the ominous POV... they are being stalked. Could it be one of Porky's gang?

THE BUS AGAIN

Pee Wee comes scurrying off the bus and over to the guys. He is frantic. He has the rubber in his hands.

Everybody starts digging in their wallets again.

‘TOMMY Hell, Pee Wee, we don't have any training rubbers.

But they continue to dig. Finally, someone comes up with another one. With a plaintive little whimper, Pee Wee is

off again. oO CUT TO:

BACK TO THE LURKING FIGURE

. The MUSIC IS VERY OMINOUS now. The figure creeps forward

slowly. Finally the figure stops and leans slowly forward into the light. We see the face. It is "Kong." Her face is ablaze with madness. She leers at Tommy. All reason has flown. She is a wild beast stalking its prey. With

a mad cry, she launches her attack. We...

THE GROUP

as they hear the weird cry. Everybody jumps. They whirl

‘around. Tommy looks wide-eyed at the spector bearing down

on him. Balbricker is crouched low, coming on like a two- ton Tasmanian devil.

ATA

CONTINUED :

Tommy turns to flee step.

There it i

Kong bowls him because his pants ate long gone. pletely crazed. Sh¢ yanks his short yanks them up, trying to crawl away ’ she yanks down, she

s!

but she is on hi over.

screams:

¥

Carter, I

told you!

Therd it is!

By this time, Coach have plunged in to 1

furious obsession pulls the whole gr She continues to scream.

a heap.

(ec I saw it!

ry

I

ntinuing)

and pull Mis

Brackett, Ted ard several Phe cops

MISS BALBRIGCKER

saw it! I told you

I'd know 4

The place is in tota chant '"Pecker-Checkd wildly. Balbricker police force manages her away, she scream

a) is

1 chaos by now.

hat penis anywhere! ©

Pecker-Checker, incoherent byi now.

to drag Balbricker off. s and laughs manfically.

——

Arrest him! Arrest him! I can Identity hum! Positively! Ha ha ha ha!

CAMERA PULLS BACK to bricker is taken awa CREDITS ROLL is Pee of the bus and yelli He pounds his chest crowd applauds and c

ry «

im before he Tommy g@rabs for his Miss Balbricker is com- s down and Tommy

from her.

§ Balbricker oup to the g

[ATL [ATD vm

rakes a shorts

Eyery time

way. Her Found in

The crowd begins to. " Tommy ig flailing Finally the

As;they carry ae

take in the whole mad scene as Bal-

The last thing we see as the tINAL

Wee sticking his head out of the window ng and waving his arms in sheer triumph. and gives a long Tarzan yell. neers.

The