The candlelit table. Although it’s afternoon, the windows
have all been blacked out for a proper dinner atmosphere.
Michelle’s right ankle is handcuffed to the chair, which is
nailed to the floor. Don stands nearby with the shotgun.
With Michelle sitting there in Teddy’s Mom’s clothes, it’s
like a bizarre family dinner tableaux.
Teddy stays in his new affect. He’s now in the presence of
royalty, and it pays to be in her good graces.
He dishes up the main course of spaghetti with red sauce.
TEDDY
Hope you like it. My one and only dish.
MICHELLE
It looks - very nice. Thank you.
TEDDY
You’ll have to excuse me, it’s-- my best attempt to approximate the royal treatment to which you are accustomed.
Michelle looks around at the shitty food, shitty wine, etc.
MICHELLE
Uh-huh? No, it’s - it’s great.
TEDDY
And, I want to apologize. For not approaching you with the proper courtesy. Not realizing, of course, what you were. That you shared blood with the Emperor himself.
Michelle is not sure how to react. She simply nods. Best to
reap the benefits of this new status Teddy has granted her.
MICHELLE
That’s perfectly all right.
TEDDY
Truth is, we’ll never make progress here unless we can speak, eyeball to eyeball, as the most evolved examples of our respective species.
MICHELLE
I agree.
TEDDY
Good.
MICHELLE
Excellent.
TEDDY
Well. On that note. Enjoy.
They begin to eat in awkward silence. The awful pause in chat
seems to linger for an eternity. It becomes so weird that
Michelle has to fill the dead air.
MICHELLE
It’s a, um-- lovely home.
TEDDY
Thank you.
Another awkward beat of chewing.
MICHELLE
Just you here?
TEDDY
Yes.
MICHELLE
Mm-hm. Always?
TEDDY
Sorry?
MICHELLE
Has it always just been you?
TEDDY
Um, well? I’d prefer we not delve too deeply into the personal, if you don’t mind?
MICHELLE
Oh. Sure. That’s fine.
TEDDY
Thank you.
More chewing. Formal and stilted. Michelle grasps for chat.
MICHELLE
So. Why don’t you-- I’d like to know more about your - movement.
TEDDY
My what?
MICHELLE
Your movement? What you’re doing.
TEDDY
Respectfully, we’re not a movement.
MICHELLE
Oh. All right.
TEDDY
A movement is many people. I did this all on my own.
MICHELLE
Of course. I see.
Teddy remembers Don somewhere behind him and catches himself.
TEDDY
With my colleague of course.
MICHELLE
Well, it’s very impressive. I’m all for people who can do that, ya know, the activism thing.
TEDDY
99.9% of what’s called ‘activism’ is really personal exhibitionism and brand maintenance in disguise.
MICHELLE
Huh. Okay.
TEDDY
I used to be the same way. I ran through the whole digestive tract in five years: Alt-Right, Alt-Lite, Leftist, Marxist, all the stupid badges. I went shopping hungry and bought the whole fucking store.
Michelle nods. So much for not getting into the personal.
TEDDY
But I was just looking in the wrong places. Until I discovered you.
MICHELLE
Well. Again. I’m impressed.
TEDDY
Thank you.
Michelle takes a chance. She turns to Don and smiles.
MICHELLE
And you as well, Don.
Don is unsure if he should reply.
TEDDY
You’ll have to excuse my colleague. He prefers not to converse.
They eat silently again. Michelle sees some BEEKEEPER GEAR.
MICHELLE
I see you’re an apiarist.
TEDDY
Of sorts.
MICHELLE
I’ve taken an interest as well.
TEDDY
Mm. So I’ve heard.
MICHELLE
Magnificent creatures. Honeybees.
TEDDY
Yes, indeed. Very much so.
MICHELLE
Earth’s most admirable creation.
Teddy looks up. A brief moment of unexpected connection.
TEDDY
Well, shit. I’ve literally said those exact words before.
They lock eyes for a moment. Michelle smiles with respect.
Teddy almost reciprocates, then turns back to his plate.
TEDDY
Right, so? What is it you admire about them?
MICHELLE
Bees? Um, I don’t know?
(thinks)
Complex society... work ethic. They do their duty and they build their world without complaint. Or piety. Or self-obsession.
TEDDY
Uh-huh. All true.
(thinks)
Which is why they’re so easy to exploit, right?
Michelle smiles. Teddy smiles. A gentle jousting.
ON DON, watching their conversation grow more tense.
MICHELLE
I just admire their resolve, that’s all. Even in the face of peril.
TEDDY
Well, we can agree on that.
Back in smooth water again. But Teddy can’t help himself:
TEDDY
What sort of peril, by the way?
MICHELLE
Sorry?
TEDDY
You said the bees have faced ‘peril.’ Such as? Go on. It’s fine. You can say it.
MICHELLE
What am I supposed to say?
TEDDY
Just say it.
MICHELLE
Why don’t you say it.
TEDDY
Colony Collapse Disorder.
Michelle smiles politely. He’s one of those loonies too.
MICHELLE
Sure, Teddy. Like CCD.
TEDDY
You’re a bit of an expert on CCD.
MICHELLE
Well, I wouldn’t say that exactly.
TEDDY
Well, I would say that. Exactly.
Michelle nods. She sees where he’s heading with this.
TEDDY
It’s all right. We’re just talking.
She could let it go. But her CEO spin instincts kick in.
MICHELLE
I take it you’re referring to the neonicotinoids my company makes.
TEDDY
Hmm. You know what? Let’s leave it.
But she’s already in mid-defense.
MICHELLE
No, I appreciate your concern. But I think your research is a bit out of date, Teddy. CCD has declined significantly in recent years. The bees are coming back. And there’s no consensus that pesticides were ever a real threat to begin with.
TEDDY
Yes, I am well aware of what you’ve all been telling us.
Michelle smiles patronizingly.
MICHELLE
I know you want there to be a master plan, Teddy. You want the bees to be dying so it can be my fault and you don’t have to think about the real reasons why species die: Immunodeficiencies. Changing habitats. Genetic factors. Or sometimes a species just... winds down.
Teddy nods, trying to fortify the levees against his anger.
TEDDY
‘Winds down.’
MICHELLE
Sure. Maybe something clicks in their heads. And they just know. Or they intuit. The futility of the entire enterprise.
(beat. shrugs.)
Who knows, right?
TEDDY
Right. ‘Who knows.’
MICHELLE
That’s right.
TEDDY
Uh huh.
They stare each other down. Like gunfighters at sundown.
TEDDY
We were having a nice dinner.
MICHELLE
We were.
TEDDY
Nice and quiet. Respectful.
MICHELLE
Yes.
TEDDY
But now we’re not.
MICHELLE
No. We’re not.
A nervous Don quietly grips his shotgun.
TEDDY
And why do you suppose that is?
MICHELLE
Well? You tell me.
TEDDY
Because you’re lying to me.
MICHELLE
Your usual conclusion.
TEDDY
You’re murdering the bees.
MICHELLE
I am not.
TEDDY
And now you’re lying again.
MICHELLE
Lies, truth, what’s the difference? I can’t change your mind.
TEDDY
You’re right, you can’t. Because I know what you are.
MICHELLE
And I know you too, Teddy.
TEDDY
Bullshit you do.
MICHELLE
I do. And do you know how I know?
TEDDY
Fuck you.
MICHELLE
Sandy Gatz.
Stunned silence from Teddy and Don.
TEDDY
What did you say?
Michelle nods.
MICHELLE
Yes. I remember, Teddy.
Teddy says nothing. He’s silent. Silent for so long, in fact,
that Michelle almost starts to doubt her conclusion.
MICHELLE
That - was your mother, right?
TEDDY
She is my mother.
MICHELLE
Right. Of course. I’m sorry.
TEDDY
And you will never say her name again.
MICHELLE
Fair enough. But we need to discuss-
TEDDY
No. We do not. Because this is not about that.
MICHELLE
With all due respect, how could this not be about that?
Teddy takes a deep breath. Fury rising.
MICHELLE
Teddy. We believed we were helping.
TEDDY
Don’t you dare.
MICHELLE
An opioid withdrawal medication could have helped your mother and millions like her, and--
TEDDY
Stop.
MICHELLE
--and the clinical trial pay - that was, that was helping her too, it wasn’t a king’s ransom, but--
TEDDY
Stop right now.
MICHELLE
Obviously we didn’t foresee the complications, for Sandy or the others--
TEDDY
You do not say her name.
MICHELLE
We believed we paid your family a proper reparation but now I see it wasn’t nearly enough. Not by half. Not by a fraction.
TEDDY
STOP.
Michelle is faltering. She’s losing her tough veneer.
MICHELLE
(becoming emotional)
Look... You’re right to distrust me. I lost myself somewhere, okay?
TEDDY
Fuck you.
MICHELLE
I became the human being I told myself I’d never become. I’m not denying that anymore. But I can still help you, Teddy. I can still help your mother.
TEDDY
FUCK. YOU.
MICHELLE
I can help her, Teddy. Truly I can.
Don drops his guard somewhat.
DON
You can?
MICHELLE
You needed a mother, Teddy. She was never there for you--
TEDDY
FUCKING DIE YOU FUCKER!
Teddy LUNGES across the table at Michelle. As he tackles
Michelle, her chair tips backwards and the nails bust loose.
Teddy and Michelle fall to the ground.
The handcuffs on Michelle’s leg slip free of the chair leg.
Teddy gets on top of Michelle and begins to strangle her.
TEDDY
I’LL FUCKING KILL YOU!!!
Michelle panics for a moment. Don has no idea what to do.
DON
Teddy, no!
Michelle reaches for a fork that fell on the floor and
stabs Teddy’s shoulder with it. Teddy screams and releases
his grip on Michelle’s throat. Michelle violently kicks
Teddy off of her. He falls back.
Michelle scrambles to her feet and assumes a defensive Krav
Maga stance.
Don raises the shotgun with shaky hands.
DON
Stop! Don’t move!
Teddy, even more enraged now, runs right at Michelle.
She evades his tackle and stabs the fork into his back. He
screams again, turns, grabs her by his Mom’s SWEATER COLLAR,
and yanks her violently to the kitchen floor. Michelle drops
the fork and falls to her knees.
Teddy crawls behind Michelle and corrals her into a headlock.
He squeezes with all his might. Michelle’s LEGS flail wildly
as she begins to suffocate.
Michelle jabs Teddy’s Adam’s apple with her fingertips. He
chokes and falls backward.
Michelle retrieves the fork and straddles Teddy. He grabs her
hand to stop her from stabbing him. Michelle pushes down with
the fork teeth as Teddy resists. It inches closer to his eye.
She is stronger. And winning.
Don shakily aims the shotgun at Michelle’s head.
DON
Get off him!
But Michelle ignores Don. She stares right into Teddy’s face.
The fork is barely an inch from Teddy’s EYEBALL.
MICHELLE
You can't beat me.
(clenches teeth)
Because you are a loser. And I am a winner.
(sharp, tight breaths)
And that's... fucking... life.
Then, suddenly, an ELECTRONIC DOORBELL rings. Everyone stops.
TEDDY
Shit.
MICHELLE
What’s - ?
Don panics and hits Michelle on the head with the shotgun
butt. She staggers to the floor, unconscious.
Teddy scrambles to his feet. He grabs Don.
TEDDY
Downstairs. Now. Don? Look at me. Do not leave its side. Do not talk to it. Do not let it make a sound. Understand? UNDERSTAND?!?
DON
(scared)
Yes, Teddy.
Don shoulders the shotgun and drags Michelle away.
The DOORBELL rings again. Followed by some gentle KNOCKS.
Teddy grabs a coat off a chair and throws it on, covering his
wounds. He starts to head to the front door, but then he
stops. And waits. Maybe whoever it is will just leave?
Then he hears the hollow sound of KNOCKING on glass. He turns
and looks into the LIVING ROOM. Casey has walked over behind
some bushes and is standing at the window. He smiles, waves,
and makes a gesture to Teddy: ‘Can you get the door?’
Teddy smiles, waves back, and gestures: ‘Be right there.’
Casey walks back to the front door.
Teddy frantically takes down the blackout curtains and tries
in vain to clean up the mess from dinner.