"BLADES OF GLORY" (2007)

I

.. ....__,.~...,/\\

Blades Of Glory By John Altschuler & Dave Krinsky

Draft 09.13 .05

FADE IN:

A crisp winter day. Even though thesun is shining you can tell it's freezing by the clouds ofsteam coming from the mouth of an eleven year old,DARK HAIRED BOY. He's putting all he's got into pulling offa tough figure skating move.

The boy pushes off with his back leg when-- SWIZZZZ WHOMP! He's hit! He drops to the iceand next to him lies what just smashed into him -- a hockey puck! We hear a loud cheer. The boy looks up and sees apee-wee hockey team laughing and pointing at him. One kid is being congratulated for his marksmanship.

The Dark Haired Boy getsup and gives the hockey players the finger. The hockey players can't believe what they're seeing. They are about to skate afterhim when a piercing whistle is blown summoning them back to practice.

As they skate reluctantly away,the Dark Haired Boy starts skating in a circle and givingthem the finger with both hands. He's pretty good ashe incorporates the "fuck yous" into a figure skating routine. He's pointing at his ass, giving the finger,making "blow me" gestures and grabbing his crotch. He's really getting into itwhen he hears something.

The Dark Haired Boy turnsand sees that he has been watched the whole time by a tinyTHREE YEAR OLD BOY. The little tot is wearing little skates and he tries desperately to mimic the skating, bird shooting and crotch grabbing of theDark Haired Boy. He quickly fallsdown, though, because he's so young. The tot struggles to his feet while trying to make the "Blow me" gesture.

DARK HAIRED BOY

Cut it out, kid, you're gonna bust your butt. And next time really jam your

tongue into your cheek so theyknow it's

a blow job taunt.

The Dark Haired Boy turns hisback and starts to skate but notices that the three year old boy is still right behindhim trying to skate like him.

DARK HAIRED BOY (CONT'D)

Beat it, I've got to practice. I've got an important, like, audition thing.

The Dark Haired Boy skates off and segues intoa nifty sitting spin. The tot skates after him, tries to spin but just slips and slidesaround. The older boy shakes his head.

DARK HAIRED BOY (CONT'D)

Okay, Shorty, you wanta quick lesson, you got it. I just hope you're carrying a full load in that diaper because this ice is hard.

Poo poo.

DARK HAIRED BOY

Yeah, right. Now you need to keep your right leg straightand get into more of a crouch.

The Dark Haired Boy does themove slowly and the little kid follows. TheDark Haired Boy is impressed.

DARK HAIRED BOY (CONT'D)

That's good. Really good.

The little kid does it again. This time even better.

DARK HAIRED BOY (CONT'D)

- Damn. Okay, now push off soyou have some momentum and see ifyou can spin all the way around.

The little kid nodsand then with surprising force pushes off and gets ina crouch. He goes into a truly amazing spin ...

The camera pushes in on theDark Haired Boy's amazed face, then pushes in on the tot spinning. We cut from the boy to the tot, from the boy to the tot,then stay on the tot who keeps spinning and spinning ...

SPINNING SKATER

The skatercomes out of the spin with a flourish and we get our first good look atJIMMY MACELROY, 26, wide-eyed and beaming. We are

SUPERIMPOSE: WORLD WINTER GAMES, MUNICH, GERMANY, 2002

We hear that haunting Native-American chantfrom Enigma's ,.._,, "Return tcoInnocence" asJimmy continues his routine. His legs move with sublime graceand precision to the music. Each 4-count carries us intoa new slow-mo shot:

1) A hushed crowd of thousandshangs on every movement. It's a sea of red, white, and blue.

2) Jimmy's pelvis: covered by crotch-hugging whiteSpandex pants. A gold lame' sash tied around his waist flaps in the breeze as he gains speed.

3) STRANZ and FAIRCHILDVAN WALDENBERG, a skating team dressed like a Greaser and aBobby Soxer. They're paying no attention to Jimmy, just whispering and laughing with each other, for all the world looking likea skating pair that is also very much in love. PAN OVER to see their sister, KATIE VAN WALDENBERG, 30's,watching Jimmy skate. She has several Team Van Waldenberg bags draped over her shoulders but is transfixed by Jimmy's performance.

4) HECTOR - Even more transfixed. We can tell he's a Jimmy fan because the scrap-book he's holding hasa large gaudy picture of Jimmy as its cover. He smiles contentedly and waves a large pair of scissors in the air asJimmy skates by.

5) Jimmy's torso:clad in a native-american vest with turquoise beadwork.The open neck exposes a baby smooth chest covered in glitter.

6) COACH, a bear ofa man in his 50's, cheers his Skater on.

7) Jimmy's magnificent ass:could be the work of Michelangelo.

WIDE ON

Jimmy from behind.He launches into a triple axel and spins fluidly through the air three times.He comes out of the spin at REGULAR SPEED ina perfect, one-footed landing. He strikes his finalpose -- the crows erupts in cheers.

SCOTT HAMILTON (V.O.)

Classic Jimmy Macelroy! Elegant with machine-like technical perfection.

DICK BUTTON and SCOTTHAMILTON sit in the booth. Behind them is written "2002 World WinterGames, Munich, Germany."

DICK BUTTON

What a performance! Dare I say a

"golden" performance?

This just makes Dick even more jubilant.

DICK BUTTON

But only one is going home tonight as the world champion!

A guy in a bear suit comes into the shot. It's the jolliest bear you've ever seen; he's multi-colored and is wearing lederhosen and a Tyrolean hat. Scott Hamilton seems less than thrilled with the furry interloper. Dick is delighted.

World Games -- Spaetzle the Unity Bear! Tell us Spaetzle, who do you like in this classic Lewis-Macelroy match-up?

Spaetzle shrugs with gusto,then waves goofily to the camera.

Jimmy rushes off the ice into Coach'sarms. Coach is clearly pleased but tries to maintain his gruff demeanor.

COACH

Good job, Kid. But save thehugs for the groupies.

Jimmy can't hold in his excitement. He jumps up on a railing and waves to his adoring fans.As Jimmy points to various sections of cheering fans,DARREN MACELROY, Jimmy's dad, hops up next to him, grabs Jimmy'shand in his own and shakes it victoriously to the crowd. Darren gives Jimmy a wink and Jimmy can't help but smile. They step down and rejoin Coach.

like ... youknow whenI did the triple axel? I felt like I could hitfour! Wouldn't that have been awesome?!

Darren isn't smiling anymore.

Jirrnnynods obediently.

VOICE (O.C.) Hey, Macelroy. Was that your routine ora Surrnner'sEvecommercial?

Jirrnnyand Coach turn toface CHAZZLEWIS, 35. He's dressed like a castoff from an '80s metalband: leopard-print pants, leather jacket, and calf-length skates made to look like leather boots. While every other skater hasan entourage of coaches and family, Chazz is alone.

Jimmy's high scores are announced.He pumps his fist very close to Chazz's face. Chazzgoes nose to nose with him.

Chazz rips off his leather coat,revealing a black vinyl vest with no shirt underneath. A sheriff's star is pinned to the vest. Chazz grabs a cowboy hat and hits the ice as music kicks in -- The Escape Club's"Wild, Wild West."

Chazz tears around the rink, shooting "finger guns" at the rollicking crowd. He moonwalks,does the "cabbage patch," gyrates his hips like Elvis. Chazz is quite simply sex on skates. "Dance to the beat thatwe love best, heading for the nineties living in the wild wildwest."

Chazz, now at full speed, steadies himselfand launches into a slow-motion mid-air splits.

CONTINUED: (2)

CHAZZ POV

Through the wide-eyed crowd Jimmystares back defiantly.

JIMMY POV

Chazz, still in the splits, points right atJimmy defiantly.

Chazz comes out of the splits and sticks the landing.The crowd explodes. So does the music. Wild west!

Chazz, drenched in sweat, races off the ice. He gets right in Jimmy's face. Chazz rips off his vestand starts strutting and flexing.

Jimmy and Chazz start to chest-bump. Coach steps in.

The P.A. Announcer starts calling off Chazz's high scores.

At the end of the sidelines,a group of Judges huddle in discussion. They break and nod to theP.A. Announcer.

CONTINUED: (3)

The crowd cheers. Male Skaters mob Chazz and Jimmy,draping them in American flags. Both Chazz and Jimmy look pissed.

ANGLE ON DARREN AND COACH

Darren, looking more pissed, turns to Coach.

Darren strides off.

All the medal-winning skaters mill around the sideline area, surrounded by well-wishers. Only Chazz is all alone. He glares at Jimmy who glares back. We hear the closing notes of "The Star Spangled Banner" and then see Stranz and Fairchild leave the ice. They're grinning like idiotsand showing off their gold medals.

Fairchild whispers harshly to Katie.

Katie pulls random stuffed animals from one of her bags. She holds one out to Fairchild.

Katie dutifully looks into her bag; it's a bewildering array of dinosaurs, dragons and Pegasi that all look very similar. The photographer is set to take the picture. Stranz putsan arm around Fairchild and gets cheek to cheek,but then Spaetzle kind of edges his way between them.

They look annoyed but quickly plaster on smiles so big they make your face hurt. The momen~ the picture is taken Stranz's -~ smile turns toone of deep menace. He glares at Spaetzle.

Spaetzle edges warily away as fastas he can. Stranz puts his arm protectively around Fairchild. A FLOOR MANAGER wearing a head set strides up.

Chazz steps up, front and center. He looks up to thecrowd with self-righteous indignation. There's no microphoneso thecrowd can't hear him, but that doesn't fazeChazz.

Chazz goes back to leaning against his rail.

A male skater in a bright green leisure suit,and one dressed like Eddie Munster head onto the ice.

Chazz and Jimmy make it onto the ice at thesame time. They actively ignore each other and look at the podium ahead of them. Chazz picks up the pace slightly. Jimmy noticesand also picks up the pace. Chazz breaks and runs as fastas he can on the ice. Jimmy takes off. They are both slipping and sliding desperately trying to get to thepodium first.

Two giant American flags, obviously jury-rigged toone hanger, descend from the ceiling as the NationalAnthem plays over the loud speakers.

Chazz and Jimmy are cramped together on the center medal podium, still draped in their American flags.This podium is clearly not big enough for two.

Jimmy bumps Chazz whobumps right back.

Chazz bumps Jimmyhard. The two begin really shoving now. Jimmy rears back and fakesa jab. Chazz flinches and falls backwards off the podium,onto the ice. The flag falls from his shoulders onto the rink.The crowd gasps.

Chazz grabs Jimmy'smedal and yanks him down by it. Jimmy topples to the ice as well.The crowd GASPS LOUDER.

Jimmy scrambles to his feetand unfurls his flag like a bullwhip. Chazz does thesame. They circle each other.

And then, both men actually start whipping each other with their American flags. It's like we're watching the most twisted locker room towel fight ever.

The skaters keep on whipping,inching closer to one another. Finally, they grab each other's headsand fall into an awkward grappling match,full of hair-pulling and Indian burns. The crowd noise slowly dies out.

The scene is no longer perversely exciting, it's just pathetic. All we hearnow is grunting and a stream of insults from Chazz and Jimmy.

After a moment, Jimmy and Chazz realize thecrowd is dead silent and has been forsome time. The guys loosen their grips and look up at thousands of appalled faces.

CONTINUED: (2)

Spaetzle the Unity Bear sadly shakes his head.

Chazz and Jimmy have just pissed everything away,and they know it.

CLOSE UP

Of a photo of Chazz and Jimmy brawling. The caption reads "ICE CA-POWS!" WIDEN to see the photo ison the front page of USA Today. It is being held by Stranz and Fairchild. Katie is at their side. They are standing in thelobby of the US Skating Federation Headquarters. Both Stranz and Fairchild are conspicuously wearing their gold medals.

Fairchild pouts petulantly.

Katie looks guilty as Fairchild breaksdown.

He gives her a comforting pat on theshoulder, then lowers his hand to give hera comforting pat on the ass.

He puts his hand over his heart.

She takes Stranz'hand and places it sort of on her heart, but mostly on her breast.

It feels very much likea courtroom. There is an audience packed with reporters and cameramen. Two long tables are set before the daiswhere the commissioner will preside. Chazz sits at one,alone. At the other sits Jimmy with his hands folded in his lap looking straight ahead. Next to him is Darren. Chazzand Jimmy also both wear their gold medals.

Chazz leans over toa borderline attractive skating official.

Chazz isnodding along to this with great understanding.

CHAZZ {CONT'D) I'm notcomparing myself to MD, but ... {CHUCKLING)Hey,what ifyou and I were havingsex and Michael Douglas came in...

She just getsup and walks away.

ANGLEON JIMMY AND DARREN

At that moment COMMISSIONER EBBERS enters and sitsdown. He looks like hewas chiselled out of rock. He has a tight set jaw and piercing eyes. The guy's got gravitas. His gaze zeroes in on Chazz.

Chazz reaches into his pocket.

He casually pulls out a large roll of cash and starts peeling off hundreds.

{CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: (2)

COMMISSIONEREBBERS

.._,, There will be no fine! Because of your

past behavior, and because of your actions at theGames in Munich, I order that you be stripped of your gold medal and banned from figure skating for the remainder of your natural life!

Thecrowd gasps.

Two guards approach Chazz. One reaches for the gold medal.

Chazz tucks his medal into his shirt but they rip off his medal and start to carry him from the room.

Chazz struggles ineffectively and is hauled out of theroom. Jimmy looks shocked. He looks up at Ebbers and makesa big deal of nodding his head.

CONTINUED: (3)

But Ebbers is out the door. The guards approachJimmy for his medal. Jimmy sadly hands it over. Chazzrushes back in.

The guards test out this comment witha series of rabbit punches to his kidneys, sucker punches tohis head and choke holds as they haul him out. Jimmy, shell-shocked,follows. Katie looks at the scene with sympathy. Stranz and Fairchild look pleased as punch.

Jimmy and Darren enter this beautifully appointedroom full of trophies, ribbons and plaques. A fire is going. Jimmy sits down in front of it to warm himself.

Jimmy takes this in and nods.

Jimmy isstunned, trying to digest this as Darren rollson.

Crawling into the fireplace is looking more and more appealing toJimmy. He's reeling.

Darren stands,making clear that it's time for Jimmy togo. Jim:nyis panicked.

CONTINUED: (2)

Jimmy stares straight into Darren's eye.

Jimmy's pleading eyes would puta basset hound in an animal shelter toshame. Darren gives Jimmy the lightest of smiles.

Darren holdsup his hand and waves goodbye in Jimmy's face.

FADEIN:

SUPERIMPOSE:3 1/2 Years Later - Boulder,Colorado. *

Bad pop music plays over a worse sound system. Amateur skaters of all ages skate around the rink. Jimmy,wearing a black unitard, shoots through the crowd,performing difficult crossovers ashe weaves in and out of people.

Jimmygains speed, preparing for a Lutz. Up ahead,a group of fiveyear olds at a birthday party take the ice.

It's too late forJimmy to stop. He leaps up and straddles the firstkid, then lands on one foot to slide by another. He deftly leaps and twists his body, avoiding anotherkid, and lands on his other foot. Another kid is right before him, though. Jimmy leaps and does a flip right over thekid, and nails his landing. He smiles at his success but there is one last kid skating right athim. Jimmy hits the brakes, doing one of those cool skate stops. He stops just an inch from the kid,but in SLOW MOTION we see a bit of the ice spray land directly on the kid's nose. The kid,ALICE, looks at it cross-eyed for a long beat, then starts wailing.

Parents rush over as does the rinkMANAGER,a scrawny,pasty- facedguy with chipmunk cheeks. He just barely passed the70 IQ mark so he's not retarded,he's just stupid and mean.

A murmuring crowd ofPARENTS and kids gathers around Jimmy.

He gestures to the skating rink with complete condescension.

This isn't quite panning out theway the manager anticipated.

The manager's brain is about to melt.

On Jimmy's horrified facewe -- CUT TO:

A crappy piece of masking tape is stuck to the dressingroom door withCHAZZ LEWIS written in magic marker. From inside, we hear women giggling and a super-long bong hit.

Chazz issprawled out on the couch. He's 20 pounds heavier and wearinga wizard's robe covered in moons and stars.A Slutty Girl in underwear and huge conical princess hat straddles him.A Guy in a Fox Costume and a toplessWoodland Fairy suck face next tothem.

Chazz looks up and sees SAM, a cute woman in her late 20's, standing in the doorway. She looks seriously pissed.

Sam storms down the hallway. Chazz saunters after her, cracking open a tall boy.

The words hit Chazz hard, but he won't let her see.He slams the beer to drown his tears and turns to her.

After a beat, he picks up a trash can and vomits intoit. Down the hall,BRYCE, the producer, smiles as hecomes at him. Bald and with a mustache, Bryce looks somewhere between Mike Judge and G. Gordon Liddy. He's an unctuous managerial type that smilesno matter what amount of shit he's piling on you. Like a living version of the Disney building in Burbank,the smiles and forced jocularity just makehim creepier.

Chazz pulls his head out of the trash can and is confronted with Bryce's malevolent smile right in his face.

This just makes Bryce smile more and give a"what can you do" head shake. He looks at Chazz with bemused disbelief.

Bryce, still grinning, strolls away. Chazz wipes the vomit from hismouth and puts on a giant wizard head. After a beat we hear more vomiting sounds.

Jimmy is working the skate rental counter. It's horrible. People are sitting casually on benches scratching and picking their feet. At the moment an elderly woman hasshoved her misshapen hoof-like foot right in Jimmy's face. A bunion makes all the toes shoot off in an almost right angle.

A hairy Serbian man put his skates down right nearJimmy's face. The smell hits him like a wall. In desperation he sprays at the skates with the deodorant/disinfectant creating a cloud which allows him to get close enough to grab the skates and chuck them over the counter.

Jimmy gets up and walks over to where the skates areracked.

VOICE (O.S.) Hi, Jimmy!

Startled, Jimmy whips around to see Hector standing behind him. He's still holding the large menacing pair of scissors, along with a thick book.

Hector laughs good-naturedly.

Hector smiles big and brandishes a large pair of scissors.

Hector has the smug look of aman holding all the cards. *

HECTOR * Jimmy, our troubles are over. The last * few years have been tough on both of us. It's embarrassing to stalk a has-been. Know what I mean?

HECTOR * I even thought about dropping you. I tried working that Ukranian skater that looks like Elvis, but the fact is I'm too old to start over. (MORE)

CONTINUED: (2)

Hector proudly holds up the thick book: "The International Skating Federation Handbook."

He tilts it so Jimmy can read it.

Jimmy contemplates the idea as he takes the scissors,cuts off a lock of hair and hands it to Hector. Hector sniffs Jimmy's hair likea fine wine, then devours it. He starts to walk off.

Chazz waits in the wings,trying to slap himself sober. Behind him, the wizard's head sitson the prop table. He doesn't notice but several fliesare swarming into the head. Sam walks by.

She just grunts and keep walking.He looks out onto the ice. The rink is dramatically lit. Fog machines hiss as smoke billows across the ice. In the middle of the rink are three skaters dressed as a FOX,SQUIRREL, and BEAR. They huddle together as their recorded voices crackleand blare through loud speakers.

Maniacal laughter spills out over the speakers. Chazz quickly dons his head and skates onto the ice.

A fly starts buzzing around Chazz's face.

Chazz moves hishead around trying to lose the fly.

The audience looksa bit confused as the wizard's head twists about madly. Soon,Chazz is using his wizard arms to swat at his wizard head. He's running around, completely out of ''--'. control. Finally,he just rips his head off with a scream.

ANGLE ON THE AUDIENCE

Kids are freaking out, parents are trying to console them. The crowd begins murmuring Chazz's name. The forest creaturesgawk at him. The music dies. Off the rink, Bryce smiles athim with intense anger as he grabs the microphone.

The crowd instantly turns on Chazz. They boo,throw popcorn and cotton candy. Chazz just takes it.

A box of Milk Duds hits him in the throat,leaving him gasping for air.

Chazz, his wizard costume half-on and half-off, is forcibly shoved out the door by two security guards,FRANK and STEVE. Bryce is behind them. Chazz rips off thecostume and throws it at Bryce.

Bryce just smiles and gives his patented head shake.

This, of course, gets nothing but a smileand a headshake.

Chazz charges at Bryce full steam but then he notices \.__;· something very disturbing -- Bryce is no longer smiling.

He is also in what looks to bea martial arts position. Chazz tries to stop,but momentum keeps him going forward where the awaiting Bryce takes Chazz's legs outfrom under him with a leg sweep and then pile drivesChazz to the pavement with a powerful open handed punch.

CHAZZ'S POV

Everything is fuzzy. But as it starts to clear he sees Bryce hovering over him and slicking back his hair. Bryce takes a deep breath that turns intoa light chuckle and then a smile. He and the guards head insideand slam the door shut.

A JarnbaJuice style place. Jimmy stands with Coach at the counter. Coach looksa little slimmer and better groomed than when we last saw him.

The CASHIER, a skinny whiteguy with dreadlocks, interrupts.

Jimmy smiles, a little surprised.

Jimmy and Coach take their smoothies and step toa table. They both try to takea sip but the drinks are so thick it's a real struggle. Throughout the scene they try to suck up some smoothie to no avail.

Coach's head snaps up.

Coach takes a thoughtful suck on hisstraw. He still can't get any juice though. He gives up.

Jimmy takes a last,determined suck on his straw, but only succeeds in turning red in theface.

Families pour into the arena. Chazz, wearing a baseball hat and sunglasses, tries to melt into thecrowd as he approaches the entrance. He is stopped short, though, by Frank, the security guard,who shoves him back outside.

Frankgives Chazz a rough shove. Chazz walks off. Once he's * out of sight, he zips around the back of the building and starts trying doors. One opens.

Jimmy wanders around the backstage area.

Jimmy turns to seea smiling Bryce. Jimmy smiles back.

Jimmy's smile fades. Bryce's hasn't.

Bryce's eyes narrow, but he continues to smile.

JIMMY * Look, it's a free .... *

Bryce's smile fades and he assumes his martial arts position. * Jimmy senses he better get the hell away from this nut. *

Ji=~ backs away as quickly as he can without running. *

Chazz enters to find Steve, the other security guard,putting on the wizard costume and practicing his lines.

Chazz grabs a cut-out of Michael Douglas from "Basic Instinct" and slips out the door. *

Chazz sneaks through the backstage area with his cut-out. Someone walks by and Chazz sets up the cut-out and hides behind it. After they pass, Chazz heads off.

ANGLE ON JIMMY

Heading towards an exit. He feels something-- A PRESENCE. * He looks up and sees Chazz sneaking across theroom, cradling the cut-out of MD.

Chazz feels a presence, too. He turns and seesJimmy. Their eyes meet for the first time in over three years. Forgetting all pretense of hiding, they head towards each other. Jimmy looks Chazz over.

A small crowd of skaters and techies begins toform. Chazz lets go of the cut-out.

They're now chest to chest.

Jimmy and Chazz crack their knuckles menacingly.

They both swing at each other at the same time. They end up in a clench and punch and wrestle their way onto the stage.

CONTINUED: (2)

The crowd gasps in recognition,and several people immediately train their videocameras on the fight.

Chazz and Jimmy sit by side in a holding cell with several other men. Chazz tries to affect a cool jailhouse demeanor.

Chazz glares atJimmy then gets up and walks away,but every corner he walks to hasa tough-looking inmate there. Chazz endsup sitting back down next to Jimmy. He glances over at the lone,open toilet.

A TV plays in the corner.In the B.G., Coach is painting on an easel.

ON TV

A NEWSWOMAN in studio.

Jimmy throwsa punch at Chazz. Chazz ducks out of theway and Jimmy shattersa wall of the set with his fist.

BACKTO SCENE

Coach turnsfrom the fridge to the TV.

Jimmy slams Chazz's head intoa stage light.

BACK TOCOACH

Disgusted.He moves to turn the TV off. But suddenly he stops, arrested by an image ofChazz holding Jimmy over his head and spinning him around.Coach snatches up his remote and hitsa button. The image rewinds, then plays in slo-mo. ThisTV has Tivo. Dramatic music fades up.

ONTV

Chazz holdsJimmy in a skater's lift position. Jimmy spreads his armsand the two spin gracefully.

BACKTO COACH

Mesmerized.But then--

ONTV

Chazz slamsJimmy onto a prop tree stump, crushing it. Not so gracefulanymore.

BACKTO COACH

He blinks.Now he's watching Jinnnyand Chazz tug back and forthon a CROWBAR. He sighs, having lost the fantasy. But then,Coach's gaze intensifies. He hits the rewind button and watchesagain in slo-mo. Dramatic music fades back up.

ON TV

The two skaters spin around joyfully,each holding an end of a log witha face painted on it. They fling their armsup as the log fliesaway like a dove being released to the heavens.

Jimmy takesChazz by the waist and hurls him through the air. Chazz twirls ina double axel and sticks a perfect landing.

BACKTO COACH

A huge smile spreads over hisface. He grabs his coat and runs out of the garage.

CONTINUED: (2)

ON TV

Cops and security guardsswarm and tackle Chazz and Jimmy.

Coach sits on a folding chair outside the cell. Chazz and Jimmy sit inside the cell,looking a bit shocked.

CHAZZ

You're nuttier thana horny squirrel in * an acorn factory. *

Coach glares at Chazz.

COACH

What the hell does thatmean?

CHAZZ *

That you've lost it,old man. *

JIMMY

It is pretty crazy,Coach. I mean, I don't think two guys wouldeven be allowed to skate together.

COACH

Nothing in the rulebook saysyou can't, I already checked.

Chazz stands.

CHAZZ

No. No way. ChazzLewis goes it alone. That means no coach andno partner. Especially not aguy. And especially not this daddy's boy.

Jimmy leaps to his feet.

JIMMY

Quit calling me daddy's boy,you don't know anything aboutme or my life.

CHAZZ

I know a lot more than you thinkI know.

JIMMY

Oh, yeah? Like what?

CHAZZ

Wouldn't you like toknow.

The guys continue to glare but sitdown.

Jimmy hangs hishead. Chazz chuckles.

Coach stands.

The guys glance at each other. Chazz shakes his head.

CONTINUED: (2)

Coach exits.Jimmy and Chazz run up to the bars.

An INMATE stepsup next to Chazz and smiles warmly.

Coach unlocks the door. Chazz and Jimmy stand behind him holding their suitcases.

COACH * You're both staying withme for the * duration. If you're going to skate as a * pair you'll have to live asa pair. *

They step inside.

Jimmy nods butChazz snorts derisively. Coach doesn't notice. Chazz snorts derisively louder. He's about to give it another shotwhen he notices Jimmy looking at a painting on the wall: it depictsa muscle-bound, golden-locked Fantasy Hero wearing only chest armor and loin cloth.He is riding a saber-toothedsnow beast across a frozen Tundra.

A door opens and closes off screen. Coach smiles.

Chazz and Jimmy turn to the door to see KIM breeze in. Kim isa young, petite Asian man. His hair is pulled backand held with a scrunchy and his walk sashays a bit likea well trained geisha.

The place looks like it's ready for a spread in Metropolitan Home. Kim gives Coach a tender kiss on the lips then playfully smacks his ass. He then shakes hands withJimmy and Chazz,who are standing there, slack-jawed.

CONTINUED: (2)

Kim breezes out. Chazz and Jimmy are still in shock. Chazz looks around,taking it all in: Leopard-print curtains, a white baby grand piano,ornate wrought-iron sconces, a framed poster forCabaret, back issues of Out magazine on the coffee table. Coach is seriously gay. Chazz turns. Coach is inches from hisface.

Coach opens the door forJimmy and Chazz, revealing a tiny room furnished with bunkbeds.

Coach stares both of them down. Chazz and Jimmy stare back defiant a moment, then back down.

Coach exits. There is an awkward beat, then the guys start unpacking. Chazz pulls out his toiletries and puts them on the bureau. Jimmy does the same. He moves Chazz's stuff to the sideand puts his stuff there -- lots of hair product. One of the bottles grabs Chazz's attention.

It looks like a shampoo bottle but hasa well groomed horse prominently displayed on it. It says, "Tail and Mane - For a Lustrous Coat." Chazz picks it up.

CHAZZ

Tail and mane? You gota pony in there?

(REALIZES) Wait, you use horseshampoo?!

Jimmy snatches it back.

JIMMY

It works, Brillo head!

CHAZZ

Calm down. I was just being (WHINNIES) neighhhborly.

Jimmy ignores Chazz and pullsa handheld blacklight wand from his bag. Jimmy flips it on.

CHAZZ (CONT'D)

A light up dildo. Is that so you can find your ass in the dark?

JIMMY

It's a blacklight. After all those years on the road I learned that this baby is a traveler's best friend.

Jimmy shuts off the overhead light,then flips on the blacklight. Theroom is bathed in an eerie glow. Jimmy shines the light around. There are very few white spots.

CHAZZ

Ooooh. Are you going to tell ghost stories?

JIMMY

You want to hear scary stories? This illuminates any stain ... especially human emissions.

CHAZZ

You mean like loads? Gross.

Jimmy keeps carefully scanning theroom.

JIMMY

You bet it's gross. That's why I don't take any chances about what I'm lying on. On any bedspread you'll see at leasta few comets. That'swhat stains look like because they glow in the dark and are streaky.

CONTINUED: (2)

Jimmy givesthe beds the once-over. Nothing illuminates.

He flipson the overhead light and turns off his black light. Chazz flopsdown on the bed.

Chazz looks caught. He quickly changes gears. *

CHAZZ * Iwas talking to myself -- the only * person Ican really trust. *

Jimmy justshakes his head and flips off the light. *

Skaters sign in at a table being overseen by Commissioner Ebbers. A crowd of reporters is gathered to the side,in front ofa podium with microphones. Around the corner, Stranz, Fairchild and Katie stand. Fairchild is caking on make-up. Both she and Stranz have on their gold medals. Katie comes forward holding two baseball caps. They are segmented into red, blue, and yellow wedges and havea beanie propeller on them. She tries to put one on Fairchild who swats itaway angrily.

Stranz grabs one and reads the writing on it.

KATIE

It's a chat line ... sort of.Part of your endorsement agreement is thatyou wear these hats at all media events and hold one phone party every month.

FAIRCHILD

You said that we'd be endorsing cell phones! I want a Sidekick!

Stranz takes Fairchild lovingly by the shoulders.

STRANZ

Don't worry, my little princess, everything is going to be different this time. We are going to make ourown publicity by going out there and guaranteeing a victory in the Nationals.

This brings Fairchild around.

FAIRCHILD

Then after we win, every major corporation will fight tosponsor us.

STRANZ

But we'll go with Nike --I want to see "Just Do It" undera picture of us.

Stranz and Fairchild embrace,then head out to the podium. They slap on the biggest,fakest smiles you've ever seen and wave to the reporters. They keep waving long after the photographers have taken any pictures.

STRANZ (CONT'D)

Okay, if everyone's rolling tape,what I am about to promiseyou will astound and possibly frightenyou.

The reporters can't help but be intrigued by Stranz's intro. Stranz smiles at Fairchild. They've got the reporters just where they want them.As a matter of fact, a reporter in the back, JAWORSKI,looks particularly astounded.

JAWORSKI

Holy crap, it's Macelroy and Lewis-- together!

Everyone turns to seeCoach leading Chazz and Jimmy to the sign up table. They quickly abandon Stranz and Fairchild to crowd around the guys.

CONTINUED: (2)

STRANZ

We are guaranteeing--! ISAID WE ARE GUARANTEEING ...

But it's too late. Stranz and Fairchild stand alone, scowling. Katie steps up,intrigued by the scene.

JAWORSKI

Chazz! Jimmy! What'sgoing on?!

Chazz stops walking and leans againsta wall with a heavy sigh.

CHAZZ

No comment.

The reporters immediately leaveChazz and follow Jimmy and Coach. Chazz tries to catch up without looking tooawkward. Coach starts filling outa sign up sheet.

COMMISSIONER EBBERS

What is going on here? You know damn well I am not letting either Lewis or Macelroy sign up. They're banned!

COACH

Commissioner, I'm not here to sign up Lewis m;:Macelroy. I'm here to sign up the pairs team of Lewis.andMacelroy.

There is a beat of silence,then an explosion of comments and questions from the media. Jimmy and Chazz can't help but smile as they elbow their wayup to the table to sign in.

Chazz, pumped, walks withJimmy and Coach through the lot.

CHAZZ

That was crazy! Mind bottling!

JIMMY

Did you just say mind"bottling"?

Yes, mind bottling. It'swhen something is so crazy it's got your thoughts all trapped, like in a bottle.

Chazz just shakes his head and walks off.

NEWSPAPERS spin intoframe: 1) PAN DOWN from the main headline to the bottom right-hand corner,and a tiny headline reading, "Forgotten RivalsTeam Up." 2) PAN UP from the headline to the top left-hand corner,"Icemen Cometh, Story D- 43." 3)The New York Post backpage banner headline, "FAGS?"

Stranzand Fairchild, reading the papers, are getting sideby side massageson tables set up in their living room. Katie sits in a chair and is engrossed in the paper she holds.

Katie stops laughing when she hearsno response. She lowers her paper to see Stranz and Fairchild glaring at her.

Fairchild snaps.

Stranz pauses. He looks at the two masseuses.

The masseuses quickly exit.

Katie notices Stranzand Fairchild staring at her.

KATIE

What? No, no way. I'm nota spy. I can barely even lie. Ialways talk too much and people know I'm lying. You guys are good liars, why don'tone of you do it?

STRANZ

They'd recognize us. But your lack of skill, talent, and appeal could finally pay dividends. Who better to get lost in the woodwork than you?

FAIRCHILD

Katie, even though you don't skate anymore, or really bring anything of value, we've stuck with you. Think of this as a way foryou to finally say, "Thank you."

Katie, looking guilt-ridden,nods.

STRANZ

Good, and send our masseursback in on your way out.

Katie exits. Fairchild wrinklesup her nose in disgust.

FAIRCHILD

Stranz!

STRANZ

Oh, c'mon, I'ma vegan.

Coach stands in the center of the rink. Jimmy is off to one side, skating in little nervous circles. Chazz is off to the other side, sitting on the ice. Neither will make eye contact. Coach takesa deep breath.

COACH

Well screw it,we gotta do this some time. Gentlemen, first position.

Chazz and Jimmy tentatively come to center ice. But Chazz holds up his finger to "wait one minute," then skates to the side and punches the padded wall. He skates back to Jimmy. With great reluctance,they go to join hands, but end up wrestling for top position.

Jimmy drops his hand and just givesChazz an "I can't believe I'm hearing this" look.

ANGLE ON THE RAFTERS

Katie, sitting ona catwalk high above the rink, trains her video camera on the guys.

CAMERA POV

Jimmy bends over and throws hisbody into a handstand.

BACK ON THE RINK

Jimmy pivots from one hand to the other.

But Chazz is already doinga handstand of his own.

CONTINUED: (2)

Chazz and Jimmy jumpout of the handstands and skate off. Coach just sighs and takesa seat on a bench.

IN THE RAFTERS

Katie watches through herDV camera. She works her way down a ladder for a better vantage point.

ON THE ICE -MOMENTS LATER

CLOSE ON: Jimmy and Chazz in starter positions.

WIDEN ON: Jimmy and Chazz skating towardtwo folding chairs. They jump them like hurdlesand keep skating toward ...

A second set of"hurdles" -- two sets of double-stacked folding chairs.Chazz clears his set, Jimmy grazes the top of his.

The final hurdle-- the rink's dividing wall. Both men make -- huge leaps,but Jimmy catches on the wall and falls. Chazz clears the wall,but can't stop his momentum.

As he SLAMS right into alocker bay.

ICE RINK SNACKBAR - MOMENTS LATER

Chazz holdsup an ice cube.

Chazz puts the icecube behind his back, clenches his ass cheeks and crushes the cube.

CONTINUED: (3)

He laughs as he dumps the ice chips intoa glass of water. Coach watches this with dismay.

BLEACHERS - CONTINUOUS

Katie peeks through some bleachers with her camera. She works her way closer to the ice for an unobstructedview.

ON THE ICE - MOMENTS LATER

Chazz and Jimmy are at opposite ends of the ice.

Chazz skates full speed at Jimmy. Chazz leaps intoJimmy's arms, and Jimmy tries to lift him but can't. They collapse to the ice. Coach steps up as they rub their bruises.

Chazz snickers at this. Jimmy is bummed.

Coach storms off. Now it's Chazz's turn to bebummed. The guys get up and start off the ice.

Chazz and Jimmy turn to see Katieon her butt on the ice. She tries to shove her videocamera under the bleachers as the guys rush over. She sits on the ice, rubbing her butt. * Chazz nods at her butt sexily.

CHAZZ

You've got a boo boo, I'llbe happy to * kiss it and make it better.

KATIE

No, it's fine.

CHAZZ

That's too bad because Ilove kissing boo * boos and making them better. *

Katie doesn't look exactly sold asJimmy steps in. *

JIMMY *

That was a hard fall.Are you okay? *

Jimmy gets down to help Katieup. Their eyes meet and there * is a definite connection. Chazz stands hovering in the near * background. *

KATIE *

Thanks for your concern,but I'm fine. *

Katie uses her foot to kick thecamera under the bleachers. *

JIMMY

Well, if you're sure you'reokay•..

KATIE

I'm fine. You run along and I'll ..•Find my skates .. whichyou should always wear when you ... skate.

JIMMY

Okay. But you shouldknow we have this rink reserved the next couple of weeks for a private training session.

KATIE

Oh. That's okay. I'll just find somewhere else for ...the birthday party... for my grandmother.

Katie cringes at herown words.

JIMMY

Your grandmother skates?

CONTINUED: (2)

Chazz leans in between them. *

CHAZZ * I should probably explain. I didn't mean * any offense. It's just thatI'm a sex * addict. *

Neither JilTimynor Katie even glance over. *

CHAZZ * (mournful sigh) *

Chazz slowly skatesaway, trying his damnedest to look * soulful, sexy and tortured all at once. *

CONTINUED: (3)

Katie nods involuntarily.

Katie nods again. She looks back at her video camera guiltily. Jimmysmiles at her.

CHAZZ {O.S.) Let's go, cocksmoker!

Red-faced, Jimmy turnsand heads off. Katie grins despite herself.

Jimmy sits withCoach and Kim at the dinner table. They're in the middle ofa nice big dinner.

WIDEN TO seeChazz is on a treadmill set up next to the table. He's walking along, sucking wind.

Chazz looks embarrassed he said this in front ofCoach and Kim. He turns tothem.

{CONTINUED)

CHAZZ (CONT'D)

No offense.

They give "Pshaw," "none taken"gestures.

KIM

So, Jimmy, I loved that fur vestyou wore when you skated to that Stingsong--

(sings)

"If the Russians love their children too." Are you guys going to wear something like that at Nationals?

Chazz snorts derisively.

CHAZZ

No way. We're going to skate to something with balls. Like "They're Coming to America" by NeilDiamond!

JIMMY

Shut up. We need something witha good beat, maybe "Hungry like theWolf."

I'm the wolf, you're little red riding hood.

JIMMY

Shut up!

CHAZZ

Come here and make me.

JIMMY

Why? Too fat to waddle over here?

BAM! Coach slams hishand down on the table.

COACH

STOP! Okay, you two littlewhiny shits are going to start learning about communication, compassion,and ...Kim, honey, what's the other "C"?

KIM

Connectivity.

COACH

Right, right. Connectivity. Kim taught me and he's going to teachyou.

(MORE)

CONTINUED: (2)

COACH (CONT'D)

And you better learn or I will kick your asses up and down the ice wearing hockey skates until you do.

Chazz and Jimmy sit on a bench. Kim is literally prancing around on the carpeted area beforethem.

KIM

Whether you dance on land or ice or water, let a beautiful image guide you. For my master's thesis,I pictured a butterfly, and I just traced thatimage on the floor with my dance. I first danced the shape of the rightwing ...

Kim runs in a loop.

KIM (CONT ID)

... and then the left wing ...

He runs in another loop,then lays out on the floor, arms stretched out above him.

KIM (CONT'D)

... and ended up as the antenna.

Coach claps appreciatively. Chazz and Jimmy clap politely, definitely not sold.

JIMMY

Which C is this for again?

I think it's for"Bull-shit." *

Chazz turns to seeCoach is right in his face. *

COACH

What did you just say? *

CHAZZ

Uh ... Idon'tknow.

COACH

That's right. You don't know crap! Do you have any ideahow figure skating got started? People literally carved figures in the ice with their skates. So if Kim tells you to picturea butterfly in your head, you picturea goddamned butterfly.

Coach walks off.

Chazz and Jimmy skate in waltz position. Kim walks around the ice,clapping his hands to keep rhythm. Coach oversees.

The guys make a turn, but they head in opposite directions, right into each other. They hit the ice.

The guys get to their feet and we

A SERIES OF SCENES

1)The guys trying to skate together. Kim skates alongside, literally pushing them closer together.

2) The guys take a turn, but Jimmy goes crashing intoand over the wall.

3)Katie, hiding in a locker, videotapes them.

4)Chazz on the treadmill. He's clearly less winded. Widen

H

to see everyone is watching "The Cutting Edge.

5)The guys pull off a nice move.

6)Kim runs around in his butterfly pattern. Chazz and Jimmy mirror him.

7) Chazz is sharpening a skate. Sparks fly. Jimmy is * getting annoyed at waiting and sticks his skateon the wheel * at the same time, causing even more sparks to fly. *

8) A POV shot from Katie's camera. It'sa close up of Jimmy skating. Reverse to see a mini-camera stuck ina plant. We * follow the wire out a window to the parking lot where Katie rncnitors it witha smile.

9) Chazz is now jogging nicely on the treadmill. He looks slimmer, but seems to be crying. Widen to see everyone is watching "Ice Castles." Everyone butCoach is crying.

10) Chazz and Jimmy move around the ice in sync. Coach and Kim look very pleased. The guys go tomake a turn, but fumble it and fall down.

Coach storms up to them.

Coach rejoins Kim as the guys prepare to skate.

Stranz and Fairchild sit together in one of those big round chairs and watch Katie's video. Fairchild clutches some stuffed animals. A shot of Jimmy stretching plays for a while on screen. Katie can't help but smile.

KATIE

... hehas so much trouble keeping his hair out of his eyes.

Katie watches fora moment then can feel Stranz and Fairchild's gaze. She turns to see them glaring at her.

Their final routine is next ...

They all turn back to the screen. Chazz and Jimmy are skating now. Stranz and Fairchild watch intently. On screen, Chazz and Jimmy wobblea bit. Stranz and Fairchild light up.

Whoa, that'll costthem on the judge's scorecards.

FAIRCHILD

It looked likeChazz was doing an axel and Jimmy was doinga Salchow!

Stranz looks at Fairchild lovingly. He traces his finger down her cleavage.

STRANZ

Sis, make room on that chest of yours for more gold.

FAIRCHILD

You too.

Fairchild tickles his chestand then his stomach.

STRANZ

Why don't we go test our body mass index?

FAIRCHILD

After you.

Stranz and Fairchild hop upand run to the bedroom leaving Katie alone watching theTV. She smiles when Jimmy comes on.

SUPERIMPOSE:Madison Square Garden *

The marquee announces the "National Skating Championships."

DICK BUTTONAND SCOTT HAMILTON sit in their booth.

Scott Hamilton looksover to Dick Button, who is staring at * him with a giant grin on his face. Scott just sighs. *

Skatersmove in and out of the locker rooms, all dressed in their garish costumes. It looks like the Warner's Commissary in the thirties,with people dressed like Antony and Cleopatra, Jeannieand Major Nelson, a football player anda cheerleader,etc. The men's locker room door opens and everyone turnsand becomes immediately silent.

Chazz and Jimmy walk out. Chazz is wearing a leather jacket and has his hair poufed up. Jimmy has his hair poufed as well and is wearing a blousy shirt. A SKATER looks them over.

Chazz and Jimmy head to the rink. They hear the closing notes of "Gangsta's Paradise." Stranzand Fairchild leave the ice, dressed as gang bangers. Stranz hasa toy pistol in his waistband and Fairchild is wearinga spangly do-rag. The crowd is cheering them wildly. Stranz catchesChazz and Jimmy's eye then makes a show of cupping his ear to listen to the crowd.

A smirking P.A. who has overheard all of thissteps up.

CLOSE ON: Two pairs of men's skates step onto the ice.

The jeering fans rise, tasting a fiasco.Jimmy and Chazz are obscured by the waving banners and blinding spotlights as they take their positions center ice.

SIDELINES

Coach watches intensely. A rock of support.

After a long, arduous moment, the noise diesdown. It is replaced by the opening notes of Hall and Oates "She'sGone."

THE ICE

We hear scattered chuckles from thecrowd. Jimmy and Chazz exchange scowls before pushing off in a synchronized,one- footed glide.

They come together in a waltz dance.They move around the rink together, gaining speed, their feeta half step out of sync. They shoot each other irritated looks.

With each"She's gone," Jimmy skates away from Chazz. But he does it hesitantly, still not happy being the"she."

Jimmy and Chazz then speed upand turn in preparation for the first double axel.They jump, spin twice in tight, synchronized coils,and land. The laughter ceases. Jimmy and Chazz lock eyesand nod.

Jimmy andChazz gain speed for another jump, this time it'sa triple.They take off into the air and hit the three spins like they're nothing.The crowd goes wild.

Jimmy and Chazz skate to oppositeends of the rink for their final jump.Jimmy turns, skates quickly toward Chazz. Chazz readies himself.Jimmy jumps. Chazz catches him and raises him overhead.

Jimmy spreads hisarms and Chazz spins them around. Cameras flash all over the arena.Chazz lowers Jimmy and then swings him around in a classic dip.The crowd erupts!

SIDELINES

Jimmy and Chazz arepumped. They fly off the ice into Coach's arms.

Coach just holdsup his hand to wait a second. *

COACH * Hang on,hang on. *

They all turn to see the huge scores appear on the board: "5.9, 5.8,5.9, 5.9, 5.8." *

The crowd goes wild. So do Chazz and Jimmy.

Chazz andJimmy high five and go to hug Coach. Coach holds \'-"' them off,though .

---------- -----··---

Coach walks off. The guys have had the wind taken out of their sails a bit.

Stranz and Fairchild sit acrossa desk from DR. RAINES, an unnaturally tanned plastic surgeon with unnaturally full blonde hair. Katie sits in a folding chair behind them.

Fairchild turns to Stranz.

He gives them a bigthumbs up and heads out.

As Katie slumpswe

'--"' Coach sits on thecouch, watching an old tape of Stranz and Fairchild, skating asSonny and Cher. Chazz and Jimmy enter.

Chazz and Jimmy looka little bummed, but Coach is leaning back with a smile.

The guys hit the ice. A driving rock song accompaniesa series of scenes of thenew routine coming together.

1) The guys,skating full speed, grabbing arms and whipping each other in rapid circles.

2) The guys leap froggingeach other, getting more and more air.

3) Coach watching,pleased.

4) Chazz slideson his knees. Jimmy does a flip over him. They high five,then glare at each other and skate in opposite directions.

5) Coach stands beforea chalkboard in his living room. He diagramsa move for the guys as the music cuts out.

The guys look a little unsettled at thename. *

CUT TO: *

ICE RINK

Quick shots of Chazz skating atJimmy and leaping into Jimmy's arms fora kind of flying cartwheel move. Both keep 1.._,,· falling to the ice-- they just can't pull it off.

The place is decorated forChristmas. Jimmy and Coach are in the kitchen,making eggnog. Chazz enters and goes to the freezer. He pulls outa bag of frozen peas and sticks it down the front of his pants.

Coach looks worried.

Neither guy seems wild about this.

The guys look at theeggy concoction less than thrilled. Coach exits. Jimmy notices something out the window.

Chazz joins him. They see Katie moving boxes into a house across the street.

Chazz smooths his hair and starts for the door. Jimmy trails after him.

Chazz sprays some Binaca in his mouth,then rubs some into his wrists.

Jimmy grabs Chazz to stop himfrom going outside.

They continue to wrestle,falling to the floor.

Jimmy lets Chazz go. Chazz stands and straightens himself. He takes a deep breath.

Chazz grabs Jimmy's faceand pushes him down. He races out and shuts the door behind him,then wedges a lawnchair against the door.

\..- Chazz hustlesup to Katie who is carrying a box inside.

CHAZZ

Ho, Ho, Ho, Want to go insideand make

Santa come early this year?

KATIE

That's ... really inappropriate. *

CHAZZ

Hey, you think I want to be here right * now? I'm a sex addict. I'm not proud of

it.

KATIE

Really, because I've only metyou twice

and both times you've mentioned it.

Jimmy runs up.

JIMMY

Hi Katie! Are you moving in here?

KATIE

Yeah, can you believe it? Small world, huh?

Chazz does one of his dramatic sighs.

you're all alone in it.

Jimmy and Katie stare athim a short beat then turn back to each other.

KATIE

So we should all go outand celebrate being neighbors. Really tieone on, pull an all-nighter. Drive around drunk. Maybe try crack -- orhow 'bout Meth?!

JIMMY

That sounds great, butwe can't -- curfew.

CHAZZ

Screw the curfew -- I'm in.

KATIE

Oh... Okay. You sureyou can't come, Jimmy?

CHAZZ

He's sure.

CONTINUED: (2)

Suddenly, two hands grab Chazz andJimmy by scruff of the neck. It's Coach and he looks pissed. He drags them off.

Katie sits alone in her nearly empty house. There are a few boxes lying around anda small, electric Christmas tree. She eats ice cream from a big carton and looks across the street.

KATIE'S POV

Coach's house looks very merry. We can see Chazz, Jimmy, Coach and Kim inside hanging lights.

BACK ON KATIE

She picks up her cell phoneand hits a button.

INTERCUTWITH:

The table is set fora romantic Christmas Eve meal. Fairchild is dressedin a very sexy Santa outfit and is feeding Stranz by hand when the phone rings. Stranz answers.

Stranz shuts off his phone. He turns to see Fairchild dangling mistletoe over her cleavage.

Chazz, Jimmy,Coach and Kim continue to hang Christmas lights. They've goneway overboard -- lights are everywhere. Blue, red and white flickering lights border the mantelpiece, the moulding and frame all of Coach's paintings. Kim pulls out a string of the classic bubbling light bulbs.(For the unassimilated Jews,these are remarkably phallic with a glass tube that bubbleupwards as the light heats up).

Coach looks at the bubble lightsand blushes.

Coach andKim laugh warmly at the memory. Chazz and Jimmy look a little uncomfortable. Suddenly the room goes dark.

Katie is holdingsome bolt cutters and has clearly broken the electricity panel to shit. She looks proud and drops the severed cableshe was holding. It whips around and sparks with electricity and she quicklyjumps away.

We can just see the figures ofChazz and Jimmy getting up and stumbling towards the hall.

It's nearly pitch black. We can hear the guys stumble along.

As they go down the hall you can seea glow emanating from their room.

Jimmy hustles into the room and comes out brandishing the blacklight like a light saberand making light saber noise.

Jimmy goes across the hall toCoach and Kim's bedroom. Chazz follows. They both stop short themoment they enter. Their amazed faces are illuminated by the blacklight glow. Gary * Wright's "Dreamweaver"begins its spacey introduction. *

REVERSE ANGLE

The room filled with what looks like thousands of little white comet streaks. They areeverywhere. The floors, the walls, the furniture, the ceiling. It's like an asteroid shower. Chazz and Jimmy turn to take in theroom, making it seem like the room is spinning psychedelically,with the streaks looking like they are moving across thesky and reflecting on Chazz and Jimmy'sface as the song continues.

They just look on in amazement as thesong continues.

Chazz and Jimmy are on the ice. Coach, lookinga bit tired, walks up.

Jimmy can't help but laugh.

Chazz and Jimmy snap into their serious mode and skate to center ice.

Coach just explodes.

Chazz leans in helpfully.

Jimmy stares at Chazz in disbelief.

Chazz gets pissed off and gets in his face.

Jimmy gets right back in Chazz'sface.

Coach storms off. The doorslams shut.

Chazz skates away.

Chazz starts doing a mincing parody ofJimmy's style.

Now Chazz is rigidly moving around likea robot. Jimmy skates out too. He snaps his fingers in Chazz's rock out way and skates in an exaggerated version of Chazz's style-- lots of tough guy expressions with assshaking and finger guns.

CONTINUED: (2)

Now Jimmy is doingawkward pelvic thrusts.

Chazz gets right inJimmy's face.

This really setsChazz off.

This stops Jimmy cold.

Chazz slidesdown to the ice, his back against the wall.

A FLASHBACK

The frozen lake we sawin the prologue. We see the dark haired boy skating a solid routine. A few kids are watching.

Chazz ignores the other kids. It's obvious he's playing to a crowd of two -- a young DarrenMacelroy and his wife. Chazz nails his finalmove and holds up his arms triumphantly. Darren and his wife rush overto young Chazz.

This is it. The momentyoung Chazz has been waiting for.

Darren gives a bigknowing smile.

Before the word is out ofhis mouth, though, Darren's view of Chazz is blocked by three year oldJimmy. Jimmy has obviously taken whatChazz taught him and run with it.

He looks and skates likea little angel -- fluid, graceful and capable of moves an adultwould be challenged by. Darren and his wife are immediately smitten.

Young Chazz can see where this is going. He turns his antics up a notch but the parents only have eyesfor the little boy who goes into the amazing spin moveChazz showed him how to do earlier.

Darren and his wife sweep littleJimmy up in their arms as young Chazz watches,devastated at first, then pissed. Some of the other kids skateup to him, sympathetic, but Chazz shakes them off and turnsand skates away. The Father skates up to Chazz.

Chazz looks like a ball of twisted rage.

And with Chazz's first grandiloquent speech about his pain and loneliness out of theway, he skates off.

BACK TO PRESENT

Jimmy looks down sympathetically atChazz. Chazz springs to his feet.

Chazz quickly skates away.

Most of the lights are out and all is quiet. That is until we hear keys unsuccessfully trying to unlock the door.

Coach enters from the kitchen and opens the door.

Coach pulls him in then shuts the door.

Coach shoves Chazz intoa chair.

Coach just sits down and stares at Chazz,who isn't so drunk that he isn't a bit disturbed by this.

Chazz looks shocked at this.

Coach walks to the back leaving Chazz alone.

Jimmy is on the ice,stretching. Chazz shows up with two coffees. Jimmy eyeshim warily as he approaches.

\.,..., Chazz smiles then chucks the coffee into the trash.

ANGLE ON THE TRASHCAN

Katie is inside with her camera. She tries to wipe the hot coffee off as quietly asshe can.

BACK ON THE RINK

Coach hits the ice.

Chazz and Jimmy start their routine. They both seem a little awkward with each other. They talk as they skate.

Chazz's neutral coolness cracks slightly witha smile.

Chazz turns a little away. Jimmy realizes he might have been a little too sharp.

Chazz looks back. Jimmy gives a slight smile. They are now really skatingin sync.

CONTINUED: (2)

Chazz lights up with recognition.

The guys are skating witha smoothness and effortlessness we haven't seen before.

Coach is beaming. This is what he'sbeen waiting for.

The guys look to each other and nod.

CHAZZ/JIMMY Let's do it!/Yeah!

They separate and both build upspeed. Then they suddenly skate at each other and grab each other'sarms sending each other in a physics defying cartwheel where each one sails through the air and then both stick their landing just inches from each other.

IT IS REMARKABLE!

Chazz and Jimmy high five. Coach rushes over and gets them in a bear hug.

ANGLE ON TRASH CAN

Katie videotapes the celebration. She wipes a tear from her eye, then some mustard from herarm and fingers.

Jimmy is getting dressed up. He's like a teenage girl the way he keeps putting on shirts,looking in the mirror and yanking them off in frustration. Chazz walks in holding the blacklight.

Jimmy quickly tosses on a dress shirt. Chazz can tell something' sup.

Jimmy gives a smile and leaves happily. When Jimmy is gone Chazz goes over to Jimmy'sbureau and takes his bottle of Tale and Mane and heads off to theshower.

Jimmy, clutching some banana bread,knocks on the door. Katie opens the door halfway.

He hands her the banana loaf.

Katie looks back into the house,which is filled with surveillance equipment and photographs ofJimmy and Chazz.

Jimmy musters up his nerve.

Katie is too overwhelmed to speak. She just nods like an idiot. Jimmy giggles. The two of them giggle and nod.

Christmas lights twinkle around thissmall outdoor rink set up in the center of town. Jimmy guides Katie onto the ice.

They begin to skate. Katie is obviously a very good skater and quickly picks up the pace. Jimmy is clearly surprised at how well Katie skates.

Although Katie is trying tochuckle at the memory of her brother mocking her, she can't pull it off.

This clearly affects Jimmy.

They look into each other's eyes.

·-..._,,Celine Dion starts playing over theloudspeaker, and Katie and Jimmy skate with intensity together. He dips her in a wide circle and people stop skating to watch them. Their bodies yield to each other with complete unity. It's like they were made to skate together. After a cradle move, Jimmy guides Katie up and then skates off intoa solo spin move. He arches his back so he can watch her as he spins. He comes out of themove and stares across the ice at Katie. Inspired, he holds hisarms out like wings and begins gently flapping them. He cranes his neck out to create an even more swan like look. With each flaphe gets closer and closer to Katie. His flapping beckons her towardshim.

Katie doesn't see this as the most ridiculous thing she's ever seen, she thinks it's magnificent. She glides towards Jimmy until he is able to enfold herin his wings.

Sir Mix-A-Lot's "BabyGot Back" starts to play over the loudspeaker.

CONTINUED: (2)

Katie enters and falls against her door witha happy smile.

Katie turns on the light to see Stranzand Fairchild.

Fairchild hits play on theVCR. Tape plays of Chazz and Jimmy nailing the Kimspin.

Katie shrinks against this onslaught.

Fairchild places a tender hand on Katie's shoulder.

This rattles Katie. Stranz also looks a bit surprised and disturbed by this but carries on.

CONTINUED: (2)

STRANZ

,._,.; Well, wait. There actually is another

way. A violent dangerousway that can only end painfully for your little skate pals. Is that what you want sis?

Katie shakes her head"no."

Katie looks beaten. She nods.

We are flying over ahuge outdoor stadium, filled to capacity. Thousands of camera flashestwinkle below.

SUPERIMPOSE: World Winter Games,Saskatchewan, 2006 *

A Torch-bearer runs ontoa stage at the center of the stadium.

ANGLE ON:

The torch-bearer, Jason Priestley,on the stage. He holds up a hockey puck and lights it with the torch.

A Games Official hands Priestley a hockey stick.Jason smacks the flaming puck. It sails through the airand ignites a huge FLAME on top of the stadium.The CROWD ERUPTS.

IN THE STANDS

Jimmy and Chazz cheer with their fellowcountrymen. They all wear matching fur-lined stocking caps and suits with slowflake-patterned bowties.

It's Media Day and tables are set up all around the massive room. Athletes sit at the tables to be interviewed by reporters. Butno one is interviewing Stranz, Fairchild or pretty much anyone else. Everyone is gathered around Chazz and Jimmy, who are clearly enjoying themselves.

JIMMY * More like a land bridge. Of course when

we first started Chazz's gutwas like a * continent. *

Chazz laughs and pulls up his shirtand shows off his flat stomach.

The reporters laugh. A SURLY LOOKING REPORTER stands.

Jimmy looks a little stung. Chazz tries to backtrack.

Chazz is trying to figurea way out. Jimmy jumps in. *

CONTINUED: (2)

JIMMY * I've got one thing to say: The past is * the past but Chazz and Iare the future, * and the future is NOW! *

The reporters are blownaway by Jimmy's emotion. He smiles * and turns to Chazz who also starts tosmile. *

CHAZZ * (finally got it) * Yeah, but what you guys can'twrap your * mind around is how crazy passionate the * hangers in my closet are. *

Chazz looks completely satisfied. *

Chazz and Jimmy are both pumped. They high-five. Then Chazz * checks his watch. *

CHAZZ * I gotta run. SAA meeting. *

Chazz takes off. Before Jimmy can head off a DELIVERY MAN

comes hustling up tohim. *

JIMMY * Uh, yeah. *

The delivery man handsJimmy a package. He opens it, * revealing some hotcocoa packets. Jimmy reads the note.

ANGLE ON NOTE

It says: Jimmy,my room tonight at midnight. We'll drink hot cocoa and wish on a star.Love, Katie

Jimmy smiles.

A junior college classroom. There are about eight to ten men and women gathered around in a circle. They look like an average bunch of middling looking people. They're not in particularly good shape,but neither are most people. Chazz is giving a soulful oratory.

Chazz puts his head in his hands. A FEMALE SEX ADDICT uncrosses her legs and leansforward.

There is something in her voice. It isn't a question, it's a come on. The COUNSELOR notices itand looks warily at his group who have all started shifting in their seats.

The group looks like it could turn into an orgy at the drop of a hat. There's a lot of inadvertent rubbing and eye darts. The Counselor seesa brush fire about to turn wild.

The Counselor looks around quickly. They seem to be calming down and settling back in their seats.

The group shifts forward. The Counselor looks worried.

It's like beating back the ocean witha broom but it does get the group in line.

At that moment the door opensand Katie hurries in. Every guy in the place immediately perksup. They all make room for her, but she sits next to Chazz,who looks shocked, worried and happy all at once.

Chazz looks at Katie. He can't believe it. *

The sex addicts mill outside the entrance,drinking coffee * and smoking cigarettes. They've all paired up and a few are * making out. Chazz stands next to Katie, still blownaway. *

CHAZZ * You're a sex addict too? *

KATIE * Sex. Sex. Sex. What can I say?

CHAZZ * You said it all. Sucha burden. *

Katie flips her hair and leans sexily towardsChazz. *

KATE * Yeah. Why don't youcome to my room * tonight and we can comfort each other? * 11:55 sharp. *

She walksaway with Chazz staring at her the whole time. He * doesn'teven notice that other sex addicts have really started getting serious.

Suddenly,BRIGHT HEADLIGHTS illuminate all the sex addicts. * We see the counselor lean out of the car as he honks.

COUNSELOR * C'mon, break itup! *

They all scatter like rats in different directions. *

Chazz still just stands there,a lone figure looking out in * the distance at Katie'sswaying ass.

Jimmy isfast asleep. Chazz checks his watch and gets up from his bed.He pauses at the door and takes one last look at his friend. Once he leaves, Jimmy's eyes spring open.

Chazz arrivesand knocks on the door. He reads from his palm.

The door opens, revealing Katie, dressed only in a teddy.

CHAZZ {CONT'D) (lustful gasp)

She instantly bursts into tears but quickly pulls herself back together.

Chazz enters the room.

Jimmy exits a cab with a big bouquet of flowers.

The room is romantically lit. Sexy music on the stereo. A champagne bucket sitson the floor beside the bed. Chazz is trying to maintain,but the mood is getting the best of him.

Chazz looksup at Katie. She's so hot in that negligee. He's sweating andstammering now.

Katie cringes at thesound of herself trying to be a vixen.

Chazz sitsdown on the edge of the bed. He looks up. Katieis seated directly beside him.

Chazz reaches out grabs Katie's breasts at the exactsame moment he blurts:

CHAZZ

I think so ...No, yes! Yes, I do! I can't go through with this.

KATIE

Thank God!

Jimmy, about to knock on Katie's door,sees the door is slightly ajar.

Jimmy opens the door and sees ...

Katie and Chazz are stillon the bed. They look up and see Jimmy and suddenly noticethat Chazz's hands are still on her breasts. Katie swats hishands away.

KATIE

Jimmy--

JIMMY

You bastard!

Jimmy charges Chazz. Chazz retreats as Jimmy trips on the champagne bucket and crashes through the bedside table.

CHAZZ

Hold on, you got it allwrong here!

JIMMY

How could you?!

Jimmy attacks again.

KATIE

Jimmy, stop!

Jimmy stands before Chazz,his fists clenched.

JIMMY

I trusted you! I thoughtwe were friends!

Jimmy fights back hisrage, then turns and runs out of the room.

They run into the hall intime to see the elevator close.

Jimmy runs out of the hotel.After a moment, Chazz and Katie run out too. Jimmy isnowhere to be seen.

Chazz sits awake on his bed. The alarm goes off. He looks to Jimmy's bed. It hasn't been slept in. Chazz sighs.

The pairs program is underway. We see several shots of teams on the ice.

1) A couple dressed as Sid and Nancy skate around with big fake smiles plastered on their faces.

2) Frankenstein and the Bride of Frankenstein-- big smiles!

3) A couple dressed like Grant Wood's American Gothic--even bigger smiles!

4) Stranz and Fairchild,dressed as John Smith and Pocahontas,grab hands and twirl together in a solid pairs spin. Theirnames move into first place on the scoreboard. They flash the biggest smiles yet.

ANGLE ON THESIDELINES

Chazz, wearing a doctor's outfit,paces impatiently. Coach nervously checks his watch.

Chazz just looksaway.

They all turn to seeJimmy, also dressed like a doctor, approach.

Jimmy blows by him. Coach looks concerned but the music, Foreigner's "Urgent,"starts to play. Chazz has no choice but to follow Jimmy onto the ice.

The guys start their routine. The crowd is already cheering. Jimmy is stone faced. They come together in a clinch.

The guys skate apart.

ANGLE ON STRANZAND FAIRCHILD

Listening to thecrowd cheering the guys on. They are clearly not happy. Fairchild rips the head off one of her stuffed animals.

ANGLE ON THE SIDELINES

Coach watches with Kim.

Kim looks disappointed asCoach signals the guys.

ANGLE ON THE GUYS

Before Chazz can respond,the final notes of the song hit and the guys strike their final poses.

The crowd rises to their feetand cheers loudly. Jimmy quickly skates off the ice ahead ofChazz.

Jimmy stops and looksup at Katie who is leaning over the stands with a pleading look. He turns away and hurries off. Their scores areannounced.

Chazz and Katie exchangea look as Jimmy disappears down the runway.

Fairchild lays on her bed, totally depressed. Stranz sits on his bed, head in hands. A copy of the newspaper lies between them. Chazz and Jimmyare pictured on the front page.

Stranz stands, determined.

Stranz smiles.

Now Fairchild smiles. After a moment, they both stop smiling, unsure.

FAIRCHILD * Internet'? *

STRANZ * Right. I'll just type in"Thug * Saskatchewan." No, what we need is an

expert. Imean, when you've got a leak * you call a plumber. * (has an idea) * And I think I've got just the plumber to * call. *

CLOSE ON Stranz. He's talking to someone across from him.

REVERSE to see Stranz is talking toTONYA HARDING. She shakes her head.

Stranz gets up and walks through the bar. He passes a big guy.

The big guy just turnsaway. Stranz is completely exasperated. He yells out:

Nobody reacts. Defeated,Stranz exits.

Chazz gets out ofa cab and he's dressed like a bull with little horns anda swishy tail. He fishes out his wallet and pays the cabbie.

The Cabbie pullsaway. Chazz turns and is immediately smacked on the head witha sap.

We widen to see Stranz is his attacker. Stranz panics and start swatting madly at Chazz's head. It looks annoying and very painful but it's notknocking Chazz out. Chazz is about to turn aroundwhen a large hunk of wood whacks him across the head. Standing there is Fairchild,but she's not holding anything. Tonya Harding,on the other hand, is holding the hunk of wood.

Tonya walks away leaving Stranzand Fairchild to pick up and cram Chazz into the trunk ofa car. It's not easy but they eventually shove/roll him into it. Stranz slams the door shut but it makesa yucky soft thud sound instead of the crisp metal sound ofa trunk shutting. He looks in the trunk and winces. He then doessome rearranging of all the shit in the trunk so thatChazz can actually fit. This time it closes.

Chazz, unconsciousand still dressed in his bull costume, is on the floor trussed up withrope so his legs are stuck under him and his arms are restricted. He also seems to be tied to a large Molson Beer Moose advertisement. His eyes flutter open. He struggles to stand and realizes he's all tied up.

CHAZZ * What~.~ Where am I? *

He looks around theroom and finally notices that Stranz is * behind him putting the finishingknot in the rope that ties him to the moose. Stranz is wearing a sixties era suit and tie and his hair is brylcreamed to the side.

Chazz snaps. *

Stranz just shakes his head.

The truth of his predicamentdawns on Chazz. Stranz just calmly walks around as if he's Olivier doing Shakespeare.

Stranz laughs and shakes his head.

Chazz actually looksa little impressed by this soliloquy. He slouchesand glowers as dramatically as he can.

For some reason,this puts Stranz a bit on the defensive.

Chazz continues to play it supercool.

Chazz stops,Stranz's outfit finally registering.

CONTINUED: (2)

Stranz opens the door and starts out.

Stranz exits and closes the door behind him. Chazz immediately loses his cool veneer and starts trying to rip free from his bonds.

The finals have started. A couple dressed like aliens skate to the theme from "2001 A Space Odyssey."

ANGLE ON THE SIDELINES

Jimmy, wearing a matador outfit, stretches asCoach walks up, pissed.

Jimmy shrugs like a sullen teenager. Coach looks likehe wants to clock Jimmy when Katie comes up.

Jimmy starts off but Coach grabs him.

Jimmy stays but refuses to make eye contact with Katie.

Jimmy looks hard into Katie's eyes. He can see she's telling the truth.

Jimmy and Katie hug and kiss.

\.,../

CONTINUED: (2)

They all look over to see Fairchild, who's signing autographs.

Chazz has managed to break offa moose leg and scoot in his trussed up manner over to the door. He's using hischin to try and turn the doorknob.

Click -- the door opens. Chazz scoots outand finds himself on the ice of a rundown skating rink. The exit is across the rink. Chazz scoots like mad towards it.

Across the rink, next to the Zamboni shed,stands Stranz witnessing Chazz's determined scooting. He checks his watch and then shakes his head.

BACK ON CHAZZ

He's actually making decent progress whena sound makes him stop. He cocks his head, then turns and looks behind him.

A Zamboni is bearing down on him. Stranz is driving,murder in his eyes. Chazz scoots as quickly ashe can but the Zamboni is too fast. At the last possible second,Chazz scoots to the side. The Zamboni whizzes past,but starts to turn to come back for the kill.

Chazz notices an old pair of skates on the ice. He slides over to them, and by wedging them against the wall of the rink gets enough leverage to start cutting hisropes against the blades. It's slow going, though, and theZamboni is bearing down on him again when, Snap! the rope cuts.

Chazz quickly stands and races off the rink just before the Zamboni crashes into the wall. Chazz stumbles outside while Stranz angrily climbs down from the Zamboni.

Chazz limps outside. He's in a crappy,abandoned part of town. He looks to the left then turns to the right to see Stranz running at him and swinging his sap likea madman.

Chazz looks off to his side. There is a steep hill that leads down to the frozen river thatruns through the city. He makes a dash for it,pausing just long enough to grab an old pair of skates lying ina pile. He then leaps over the railing and rolls down the hill towards the ice. Stranz looks over the railing. He laughs at Chazz, who sits at the bottom of the hill, putting on the skates.

But Chazz just shoots Stranza bird and skates off down the river. Stranz looks off in the direction Chazz is skating. He sees the dome of the skating arena in the distance.

Stranz races to his car and peels out.

Jimmy, Coach and Katie plead witha Canadian Mountie while Fairchild affects her most innocent demeanor.

Monty salutes. Fairchild smiles until the Mountie Mascot is gone. Then she looks deeply worried. She reaches for her cell-phone. It is pink with fakediamonds all over it. It looks like something a rich Barbie would use.

Chazz races towards the arena. A pair of recreational skaters are wowed by a man in the bull costume whizzing by. Chazz zips around a bend in the riverand frowns. Just ahead, Stranz has parked at theedge of the ice. He finishes lacing up his skates, then moves onto the ice blocking Chazz's path.

Chazz lowers himself intoa crouch and picks up speed. Stranz seems unconcerned. He pulls his hand out from behind his back and Chazz sees he's holdinga big metal pipe.

Stranz winds up to swing,but at the last second, Chazz veers off the ice and jumpsonto the river's embankment. He does a sickening face plant into the grass. Stranz smiles until he sees Chazz get up and start tohobble off. Alarmed, Stranz follows. A very slow,careful chase on land ensues.

Chazz awkwardly crossesa street. His blade gets stuck in a grate. Stranz slowly makes hisway closer. Chazz just manages to get free, He gingerly takes off, Stranz on his tail.

We hear Snoop Dogg saying,"Ring shnizzing a ding" coming out of Stranz's pocket. It's his cell phone. He checks the number and flips it open impatiently.

Stranz puts away the phoneand continues hobbling after Chazz.

Up ahead, some skateboarders are sliding downa stair railing. Chazz hops up and balances carefully ashe slides down on his skates. Stranz follows but slips and lands on his nuts.

Chazz hits the ice of the river again. Reveling in being back in his element,Chazz lets out a victory cheer.

He then notices severalyoung children skating nearby.

CHAZZ (CONT'D)

Sorry.

Chazz looksup and immediately hits the brakes. Ahead of him, the ice ends ata bridge under construction.

CHAZZ (CONT'D)

Sonuvabitch!

(then, to kids)

Shit, sorry!

A concrete stairwayleads off the ice. Chazz starts climbing up as best hecan. Over his shoulder, he sees Stranz rapidly approaching.

CHAZZ (CONT'D)

Excuseme. On your left. Coming through.

It's hard toremember to lift his feet enough to clear the skate blades,so Chazz keeps tripping. Finally, he gets to street level and finds himself at the entrance toa mall. He looks fora way around but hears the whoosh of Stranz's pipe. Chazz rushes inside.

Chazz skate/walks across the marble floor. Stranz is in close pursuit. They hit an escalator. They both try to climb the steps but it's wobblyfrom the escalator grooves. At the top,Chazz looks around and then awkwardly gets on the * down escalator. Stranz swats at him as they pass but can't * balance wellenough to get Chazz. Stranz gets to the topand * followsChazz on the down escalator. *

Chazz runsdown a small embankment and onto the ice again. The arenalooms large just ahead. Moments later, Stranz hobbles out, still in pursuit.

Coach is talking toa rink official.

RINK OFFICIAL

Lewis and Macelroy skate in ten minutes. If they're both not here,they're scratched,

ANGLE ON JIMMYAND KATIE

Waiting nervously.

Katie is touched by this. She's tempted.

Jimmy and Katiehug before they rush off.

Chazz begins to build a lead on Stranz. The arena is just up ahead. He yells over his shoulder.

Chazz whizzes around a corner. His eyes go wide. REVERSE SHOT to see that a mass of yellow caution tape is just ahead, blocking his way. A sign says, "Danger ThinIce." Beyond the tape, part of the ice has broken away revealing the ice cold river.

Chazz is going too fast to stop. He hasno choice but to veer off the ice again. But there's no soft grass here,only a guardrail blocking the way from a steep cliff. Chazz flips over the rail and disappears from view. His screams drift off into the abyss. Stranz skates up and looks over the guardrail.

STPANZ'S POV

Of the steep cliff and nothing else. Chazz is gone. Stranz smiles, then quickly skates away.

Coach walks up to Jimmy and Katie.

Jimmy and Katie are smiling like idiots.

Coach storms off. Jimmy and Katielook a little sheepish.

At that moment,Stranz hurries by. He gives them a smug wave.

Jimmy isabout to go after Stranz but Stranz quickly steps onto the ice with Fairchild,who is now dressed up like Marilyn Monroe. Elton John's "Candle in the Wind" plays.

ANGLEON STRANZ AND FAIRCHILD

Stranz'sJFK chases Fairchild's Marilyn Monroe around the ice. Once he catches her, they segue into an extremely sexual routine,mostly involving her skirt billowing up in the Classic Monroe fashionand JFK coming at her from behind.

BACKON JIMMY AND KATIE

A rink official walks by.

Jimmy and Katieexchange a look. All seems to be lost.

We are CLOSE ON the top edge of the hill Chazz tumbled down. After a beat, a skate appears. It is held in a hand and is being used as a pickaxe. Another skate appears and we see Chazz struggle to hoist himself up.

Stranz and Fairchild skate off the ice,disheveled from their romp and beaming. The crowd cheers loudly all around them.

ANGLE ON ANNOUNCERS' BOOTH

Dick Button and Scott Hamilton in position.

ANGLE ON THE RINK

The Rink Official stands with Coach, Jimmy and Katie. He's checking his watch.

Coach tries to comfort Jimmy.

But Jimmy doesn't look placated by this.

ANGLE ON THE STANDS

At the very top row, a door bursts open and Chazzstumbles in. He's one bedraggled bull. He looks like Dustin Hoffman yelling down to Katherine Ross in "The Graduate,"but in a bull costume.

There's no one around to witness this dramatic entrance, though. Chazz looks surprised to be so high up. He runs up to an USHER.

The usher points to the opposite end of the arena. Chazz looks down to the ice.

CHAZZ'S POV

The Rink Official is looking at his watch and shaking his head.

BACK ON CHAZZ

He runs up to the back row of seats.

CHAZZ

Hey, everybody, Ineed some help!

Everyone turns, shocked to seeChazz standing there in his costume.

FANS

It's Chazz Lewis!/Chazz,I love you!/Lewis, you suck ass!

CHAZZ

I need to getdown to the ice -- now! Crowd surf!

And with that,Chazz runs and leaps on top of the crowd. No one was expecting this,though, so Chazz crushes several people but they soon recover and start passing him down over their heads.

CHAZZ (CONT'D)

Faster! Over thatway!

(slapping a hand away)

Hey, no freebies!

ANGLEON THE RINK

The Rink Official is countingdown the last seconds. A sudden cheer from thecrowd distracts everyone, They look up to seeChazz being passed down the crowd towards them.

JIMMY

There he is!

Jimmy, Coach and Katie race over to catch Chazz.

RINK OFFICIAL *

Lewis and Macelroy...You're up!

Coach shovesJimmy forward. *

COACH *

Get on the ice. *

As Jimmygets to the center of the rink, the crowd dumps * Chazz onto the ice. He scurries to the center to meet Jimmy. *

JIMMY

Katie told me everything-- I'm sorry I doubted you.

CONTINUED: (2)

Jimmy nods

The music starts -- Seal's "Kiss From A Rose." Chazz looks confusedand slightly panicked as they start to skate,but goes into the routineanyway. They hit their first triple axeland the crowd cheers.

The guys continue their routine. Their joy and camaraderie come through. They're hitting all their marksand the crowd is loving it. At one point, Chazz bends over andJimmy flies up on top of him so his back is resting on Chazz's back. They spin in opposite directions.

ANGLE ON STRANZ AND FAIRCHILD

Watching, worried. Stranz looks up at the crowd,already on their feet. He sees the judges, who are actually smiling, enjoying theshow.

He reaches down into his bag and furtively pulls outa gun.

ANGLE ON CHAZZ AND JIMMY

They skate together towardsone end of the rink.

ANGLE ON STRANZAND FAIRCHILD

Fairchild notices Stranz twistinga silencer onto his gun and * crouching intoa darkened area beneath the stands. She looks * concerned.

FAIRCHILD

Now, go for Chazz's head you couldn't miss that melon.

Stranz nods. He sees Chazz and Jimmy skating towards them. He carefully takesaim. He's about to pull the trigger when a hand suddenly swings in and grabs thegun. It's Hector!

HECTOR

You can't kill Jimmy!

He yanks thegun away, then points it back to the ice.

HECTOR (CONT'D)

I must be the one to killJimmy so we will be joined together for eternity!

Stranz shrugsand happily lets Hector through. Hector hurriedly aimsand gets off a shot.

ANGLEON CHAZZ AND JIMMY

Skating together.

CHAZZ

Okay, this is--ooph!

Chazz wincesand grabs his arm. He reels back in pain, nearly knockingJimmy over. They just manage to recover.

ANGLEON ANNOUNCERS' BOOTH

DICK BUTTON

Oooh. What happened there?

SCOTT HAMILTON

I'm not sure. But that may have just cost them the gold.

ANGLEON CHAZZ AND JIMMY

JIMMY

Are you okay?

CHAZZ

I think I pulleda muscle.

JIMMY

Your arm's bleeding!

CHAZZ

Actually, I think I just got shot.

Jimmy's eyes widen.

ANGLE ON HECTOR

HECTOR

I shot Chazz! No! I don't want to be joined for eternityto Chazz!

He goes to aim again, but sees the cops rushing over. Hector quickly shoves thegun in Stranz's hands and races off. Before Stranz can react,the cops fly in and tacklehim.

ANGLE ON CHAZZ AND JIMMY

CHAZZ

I don't know ifI have the Kimspin in me.

Jimmy notices Chazz's blood is trailing onto the ice.

JIMMY

Oh, my God! We have to stop!

CHAZZ

No! We're not quitting! We're so close. We just need a finish. Get us there, Jimmy.

JIMMY

What can I do? If we can't do the--

CHAZZ

Improvise!

JIMMY

I-- can't ...

CHAZZ

Yes,you can. I've never said this to anyone but myself-- you're the shit. All you have todo is forget about all that focusing crap and skate. Skate like that first dayI saw you on the lake.

ANGLEON ANNOUNCERS' BOOTH

ANGLE ON THE RINK

Indeed,the judges look less than pleased. The crowd is also out of ita bit.

ANGLE ON CHAZZ AND JIMMY

Jimmy notices thatChazz is losing more blood on the ice. He looksaround the rink.

Jimmy nodsand starts to lead Chazz around the ice.

ANGLE ON COACH

Standing with Katie. He looks confused.

Katie looks transfixed though.

ANGLE ON CHAZZ AND JIMMY

Jimmy is ina zone. He dips Chazz so that Chazz's injured arm ison the ice. He skates in big, dramatic loops with Chazz laid out on the ice below him. The crowd is silent, a little confused.

ANGLEON CHAZZ AND JIMMY

Chazz'sarm bounces a little on the ice.

Chazz's eyes flutter. He starts hallucinating.

Jimmy dipsChazz again and spins him around in a small quick circle. The song ends and Jimmy lifts Chazz up and they strikea final pose. There is complete silence for a beat. Then,the crowd explodes in a huge cheer. This jolts Chazz back to life. He's mystified by the cheers, but smiles. He then noticessome blood on the ice.

Jimmy points to the big overheadTV screens. We see

SHOTSON THE SCREENS OF A HUGE, PERFECTLY SKATED ROSE.

OVERHEADSHOT - THE ROSE IN ALL ITS GLORY

Jimmy has used the blood from Chazz'sarm to paint a giant red roseon the ice.

BACKON JIMMY AND CHAZZ

·"- ANGLEON DICKBUTTON AND SCOTT HAMILTON

PA ANNOUNCER {V.0.) Scores for Lewis and Macelroy: 6.0, 6.0, 6.0, 6.0. Lewis and Macelroy win the gold!

The crowd goes even wilder. Chazzand Jimmy embrace. Katie and Coach rush over and hug them too.

A team of PARAMEDICS comes running up.One starts feverishly * checking Chazz's vitals. *

PARAMEDIC * This man's lost a lot of blood! *

Jimmy excitedly keeps talking. *

PARAMEDIC * We gotta roll! *

CONTINUED: (2)

The other paramedic urgently waves the ambulance to back up * to get to Chazz. *

Darren wrestles his way through the crowd to Jimmy.

Darren tries to embrace Jimmy, but Jimmy holdshim off. He holds up his hand and extends the middle finger. Darren looks at the bird, shocked. Jimmy moves his finger off to the left, and Darren follows it with his eyes. POW! Jimmy uses his other hand to deck Darren.

Coach smiles. Katie smiles. Jimmy looks over to Chazzwho * is giving him a thumbs up as he's wheeled on agurney into * the ambulance. *

He turns and gives Katie a long passionate kissand then * breaks away to hop into the back of the ambulance.

Coach and Kim are standing there with their arms around each * other, smiling happily. *

COACH * You can ride with us, Katie. *

The ambulance pulls out. From inside the ambulancewe hear * Chazz's weakening voice. *

Coach, Kim and Katie head for the exit. The ambulance heads * down the length of the arena, then turns into one of the large service exits. As the ambulance turns we reveal Hector * is clinging to the opposite side. He shimmies over to the * back and as the ambulance disappears into the passageway * Hector opens up the back of the ambulance. *

FADE TO BLACK. *